Two zebras are talking and one asks the other, "Am I black with white
stripes or white with black stripes?" The other replies, "Well I don't
know. You should pray to God about that and ask him." So that night he did
and God replied, "You are what you are." The next day he said to the other
zebra, "I still don't understand what I am because God just said, You are
what you are." The second zebra responds, "You must be white with black
stripes or else God would have said, Yo is what yo is."
@zabo great jokes my sweetz...
Thankx princess ani
An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess. The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop and stay overnight.
The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"
The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!"
<font size="3"><font face="Calibri">An airline captain was breaking in a new blonde stewardess.
The route they were flying had a layover in another city. Upon their arrival,
the captain showed the stewardess the best place for airline personnel to eat,
shop and stay overnight.</font></font><font size="3" face="Calibri"></font>
<font size="3"><font face="Calibri">The next morning, as the pilot was preparing the crew for
the day's route, he noticed the new stewardess was missing. He knew which room
she was in at the hotel and called her up wondering what happened. She answered
the phone, crying, and said she couldn't get out of her room. "You can't
get out of your room?" the captain asked, "Why not?"</font></font><font size="3" face="Calibri"></font>
<font size="3"><font face="Calibri">The stewardess replied: "There are only three doors in
here," she sobbed, "one is the bathroom, one is the closet, and one
has a sign on it that says 'Do Not Disturb'!" </font></font>
A man walks in a bar with his pet monkey. He sits down and orders a drink, meanwhile the monkey is running around all over the place and jumps up on a pool table. He grabs the 8 ball, shoves it into his mouth and swallows it hole.
"Holy crap!" says the bartender, completely livid. He says to the man, "Did you see what your stupid monkey just did?"
"Nope. What did he do this time?" says the man.
"He just swallowed one of the balls off the pool table, whole!" says the bartender.
"Yeah, well I hope it kills him 'cause he's been driving me nuts" says the man.
After finishing his drink, the man leaves.
A few weeks later the man returns to the bar with his monkey. After ordering a drink, the monkey starts running wild around the bar again. Up on the bar, he monkey finds some peanuts. He grabs one out of the bowl, sticks it up his butt, then pulls it out and eats it. The bartender is disgusted.
"Did you see what your stupid monkey did this time?" he asks.
"What now?" responds the man.
"He stuck a peanut up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it!" says the bartender.
"Well, what do you expect?" replied the man. "Ever since he ate that pool ball he measures everything first!"
</p>
<font size="3"><font face="Calibri">A man walks in a bar with his pet monkey. He sits down and
orders a drink, meanwhile the monkey is running around all over the place and
jumps up on a pool table. He grabs the 8 ball, shoves it into his mouth and
swallows it hole.</font></font><font face="Calibri"><font size="3">"Holy
crap!" says the bartender, completely livid. He says to the man, "Did
you see what your stupid monkey just did?"</font></font><font face="Calibri"><font size="3">"Nope. What did
he do this time?" says the man.</font></font><font face="Calibri"><font size="3">"He just
swallowed one of the balls off the pool table, whole!" says the bartender.</font></font><font face="Calibri"><font size="3">"Yeah, well I
hope it kills him 'cause he's been driving me nuts" says the man.</font></font><font face="Calibri"><font size="3">After finishing his
Heheh the monkey soundz cute
drink, the man leaves.</font></font><font face="Calibri"><font size="3">A few weeks later the
man returns to the bar with his monkey. After ordering a drink, the monkey
starts running wild around the bar again. Up on the bar, he monkey finds some
peanuts. He grabs one out of the bowl, sticks it up his butt, then pulls it out
and eats it. The bartender is disgusted.</font></font><font face="Calibri"><font size="3">"Did you see
what your stupid monkey did this time?" he asks.</font></font><font face="Calibri"><font size="3">"What now?"
responds the man.</font></font><font size="3"><font face="Calibri">"He stuck a peanut up his butt, then pulled it out and
ate it!" says the bartender.</font></font><font size="3"><font face="Calibri">"Well, what do
<p>
you expect?" replied the man. "Ever since he ate that pool ball he
measures everything first!"</font></font>
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