Chapter 7
Present day
Sanour punjab
Yes y didn't he remained her best buddy…he thought sitting and staring into darkness
… y cant he be her just good friends…y on earth he fell for her……y didn't he let his dream and desire die within him…..y didn't he restricted himself………he thought as he sat in the car unmoved……he was in distress…..there was nothing except pain a pain tht showed everywhere in his creased forhead in his dry eyes it lived in his soul it breathed through his body………wish he hadn't listened to his heart…….never!……wish he could kill his emotions for her… wish he would have stopped himself loving her ……..who said love brings happiness to heart damm it hurts ! it hurts painfully……..! wish he never love her…...but god dammit love !... it didn't stop…….…! It awakened like a storm in his heart tempest so intense tht it plundered everything
He kept staring into nothing the past memories retraced in his mind…….
Flashback one year back
Sanour punjab
Gulaal was puzzled with last few incidents she thought to clear the matter between them……...but talking about their relationship under such circumstances was rather difficult….hence she tried to stay away from him she wanted to keep a distance from him she would go to her parents house she would ignore his anonymous call she would make an excuse wenever he would try to speak to her…..but was tht as easy as she thought?…… the more she tried to push him away the more he pulled her towards him
Both suffered equally….everyday they were fighting with their own self….he wanted to make her feel safe in his arms but she slept alone with lonilessness he wanted to hear her word but she remained in silence……he wanted to shower warmth of his affection but she shriveled in cold he wanted to love her but she starved in agony he wanted to enjoy the sunshine but she immersed in darkness making him restless day by day
It was late in the evening gulaal had arrived from her parent's house she asked preeto about kesar
Preeto said "nahi parjaiji kesarveerji ne subah se ek niwala tak nahi khaya hai…factory se aane k baad aapko puch rahe the…meine kaha apka khana laga diya hai par unhone ulta mujhe daant diya……ab aap hi sambhalo veerji ko" she went outside
Gulaal took a deep breath and went inside his room…he was sitting in his room in fury
Gulaal said "kesar tune subah se kuch khaya kyu nahi"
He looked at her and threw a angry glance at her he said angrily "tu bol gulaal tu kahan thi…..aur tu batane ki jarurat bhi nahi samjhati gulaal ki tu kab aayegi…apna phone bhi saath lekar nahi jaati biji se poocho to wooh bhi kuch nahi kehti… tujhe koi farq nahi padta ki mein yanha tera intzaar karta hun tujhe koi matlab nahi hai haina…..
Gulaal said "kesar mujhe kuch jaruri kaam tha"
Kesar replied back "acha aur kya tha wooh jaruri kaam…kya mein jaan sakta hun ki tujhe roz roz aisa kaun sa kaam pad jaata hai ki tujhe yeah bhi yaad nahi rehta ki mein factory se lautane k baad teri rah dekhta hun
Gulaal closed her eyes in desparation and said "meine preeto se kah diya tha tujhe khana pasrone k liye "
Kesar replied angrily "tujhe pata hai gulaal mein teri bina khana nahi khata hun"
Gulaal retorted "bas kar kesar yeah baar baar gulaal k rat lagana band kar…….bacha nahi hai tu jo tujhe har cheez k liye gulaal chahiye"
he came closer hold her hand and looking straight in her eyes he shoted back "chal acha hua gulaal ki tujhe yeah to samajh mein aa gaya ki ab mein bacha nahi hun……" he said with grave intensity in his eye he then freed her hand and walked out of his room angrily
Gulaal shrieked in fear
In the evening she went in the terrace to pick up the clothes and his words "gulaal tujhe yeah to samajh mein aa gaya ki mein ab bach nahi hun" kept haunting her was she viewing him as a man or was he still a boy to her? …she was so lost in her own thoughts tht she didn't noticed the wet slippery surface of the terrace suddenly her legs slipped and she fell on her back…..
Kesar who had just reached the terrace saw her………. he immediately ran towards her……he asked nervously gulaal….gulaal kya hua" helding her with his arms
Gulaal closed her eyes in pain and took a deep breath she nodded her head and said "kuch nahi dhyaan nahi diya fisal gayi"
She tried to stood up but before she could get up kesar scooped her into his arms and carried her downstairs
Gulaal was hesistant she said "kesar…mein…….."
But he didn't budge he carried her to her bedroom and gently placed her on the bed
He cupped her face and asked her in concern "gulaal tu theek haina bata kanha chot aayi hai"
She sqeezed a faint smile and said "haan mein thek hun" and she tried to stood up but her back hurted badly and she grimaced in pain "aah"
Kesar was worried he immediately made her sit on the bed and said "gulaal kya rahi hai tu"
He then moved and sat behind her and touched her back gently and asked "yanha dard haina"
Gulaal closed her eyes and winced
Unabale to bear her pain…keasr immediately took off her pallu from the forehead….gulaal was clueless she resisted she said "kesar mein kar lungi……….."
Kesar replied "chup kar gulaal dekhne de mujhe" he then pushed her hairs aside……..she was wearing salwar kameez her back barely visible……kesar was reluctant for a second he took a pause then he untied the string of her kurta, and pulled her kurta slightly to see the bruise….gulaal shuddered she suddenly felt more alert again…the awkwardness increased manifold
kesar looked at the small bruise it wasn't severe yet he was concerned he touched her gently…gulaal shivered at his gesture ……. she gave a small shrug and said "mein thek hun choti si chot hai"
Kesar looked at her and said "acha chot si chot hai nishan pad gaya hai ruk dawa lagane de….."
And he started looking for an ointment
Gulaal resisted "kesar rehne de mein baad mein laga lungi
Kesar replied "mujhe pata hai tujhe apni kitne fikr hai"
He said in irritated tone "jarurat kya thi upar jaane ki"…… "aur dekh k kyu nahi chalti kitne chot aayi hai tujhe" he said squeezing some ointment in his palm….."Chal dawa lagane de"
He then looked at the bruise again this time little hesitant his fingers trembled …..his breath quickened he swallowed a huge lump in the throat and touched her again……….gulaal was shaking ………..he looked at her delicate skin and began to apply the ointment on her wounds the salve was cool as he pressed it to her skin..……….it calmed her senses…but kesar was lost at the touch of her skin…The sensation wizzled like fireworks through his system he was so lost in her tht he didn't knew wen his fingers started tracing her back involuntarily……all his senses were in fire ………one part of him desired her so badly the another part scared of those very desires…………he made a desparate attempt to command himself…..but her closeness made him dizzy a chill ran down his body ……. he never felt tht tempted before……… his mind was blank at the moment he closed his eyes leaned to her his breath tickled her
He moved his lips closer and kissed her back softly…….. his lips grazed her skin and he whispered "I like u so much"
Gulaal was numb she froze…….paralyzed by the horror tht happened just now……her face grew pale……… she felt as if she was stuck by the lightining she got up immediately and ran fast as she could…………….leaving him in distress
Gulaal was running frantically she ran and locked herself in the granary………..she was sweating heavily…she closed her eyes "I like u so much" the shouted words burned her ears tearing her heart……. they were loud and strong "I like u so much"
She slopped on the floor she remembered the kiss and broke into hysterical tears she cried inconsolably lost in the world of pain the tears flew and the heavy feeling at her heart reminded her tht her heart was broken…………..she felt lifeless……
She said to herself "yeah sab kya ho raha hai……..mein kya karu………… kesar wooh kyun…..kyun" and she cried and cried until her eyes didn't have any more tears to shed until her body ached from its tension…she wrapped her arms around her knees and pulled her closer she sat there motionless………..
For kesar it felt like a strom brewing inside him it was as if thousand of wasp were waging war on him inside pulling him this way or tht he felt a strange possessiveness and obessissiveness building inside in many ways tht scared the hell out of him the growing turmoil was taking residence he felt agrravated and irritated both with himself and gulaal…………he thought he would sort out this confusion he would talk to her as soon as possible he waited for her whole night but she didn't turned up…………. exhausted and tired his mind gave up and he went in deep slumber
Next morning gulaal stood up she was determined she went straight into biji's room
Biji saw her she was worried gulaal tu..yeah kya haal banaa kar rakha hai aur tu itni subah baat kya hai"
Gulaal looked at biji and she went near her she sat near her feet and said "biji baat hi aise hai ki mein khud ko rok nahi paayi…biji meine kesar k liye kuch socha hai…. aapse anumati lena chahti hun"
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