Dia Mirza - "Why Can't Women get Pregnant before Marriage?" - Page 2

While I can't help but find it convenient that Dia is now claiming her marriage had nothing to do with her pregnancy, with the timing being what it is, I do accept and understand her point. I know so many people who would have benefitted from their parents either divorcing or having never gotten married in the first place. And I don't even mean that the households are abusive or toxic (though some are), but also just so many of my friends who are terrified of relationships because for their entire lives the main relationship they witnessed was basically a loveless obligation, in which two people loved their child/children but shared basically nothing else in common.

Also, on a personal note, I am someone who is asexual/aromantic, but I do want kids, and I plan to have them by way of adoption eventually. I know some people still consider this a non-ideal situation to bring a child into, but if you ask me children really just need a stable support system of some kind and lots of love, which I know that I would be better equipped to provide as a single woman than if I were in a relationship of obligation/convenience.

Originally posted by: HearMeRoar

Children from 2-parents households fare better. Doesn't matter if you're married or not. It takes 2 committed adults to raise a child. But marriage is also something that keeps said parents together.

Call me feminist but it's not a MUST to have both mom and dad. It's a lot of single moms who do a great job raising leaders. Real life experience, a father can die when the baby is just born and a single mom raising her kids can make them independent in life to the point they don't need to depend on anybody. Even president Obama was raised by a single mom, I believe his dad was not part of his life. I know many kids who have both parents in the house who are in jail or made bad decisions in life. So no having 2 parent or 1 parent does not make a difference, it helps with financially but destiny is written whether it's good or bad by the almighty. It's great to follow traditional marriage before baby. But if the husband dies Or you get divorce and the woman is a single mom, I believe she can be a better parent than having Two parents, I have seen many examples of this. In school, I used to see kids who have single mom raising them doing better getting A's and B's while the ones who have both parents in the house are not paying attention in class, skipping school and etc. Some of the women I know in real life who are business owners who have successfully personal and professional life was raised by a single woman. So let's not underestimated the power of a woman.

If a woman is ready to have a child and give it a good life, then it doesn't matter if she is married or single. I don't think children need two parents. They just need a loving supportive environment. There are plenty of single parents who do a great job and plenty of couples who mess up their children real badly. Also, marriage is not going to guarantee that the father will stick around or be involved. Many people co-parent together despite not being married. Many women end up being the sole caregiver for children despite being married.

It's time we shed the archaic perceptions of marriage and children. Also, there is no way of knowing whether the marriage was due to the pregnancy or pregnancy was a coincidence for a couple that was getting married. I have friends who got married within a few months of having a baby, but the marriage was planned well ahead and they had been trying for a while. Many people with high-risk pregnancies do wait until they are into the second trimester before announcing pregnancy.

My idea is if a woman or a teen girl gets pregnant before marriage, the society should take it normal as to not put any kind of pressure on her. The society can advise her but must not make her feel awkward about it as to make her living difficult living in society.

In England, more than 65% women are unwed mothers. Mostly these are white women. Their society is so open and understanding.

What a coincidence i was just listening to a audiobook of a novel abt it

That 2-parent households fare better is proven by studies.

That marriage makes parents stay together is also statistically proven.

There may be myriad reasons behind the numbers, including income. But it is what it is.

So I don't understand bringing feminism into it.

You can argue about not sacrificing yourself for you children (I don't; if you have kids, they need to be priority). You can argue about not ostracizing single parents (they shouldn't be). But how can numbers be argued with? They're either there, or they're not.

P.S. numbers show gay parents who are married have the same success with their kids as straight parents who're married

You married because you want to spend your lives together, Im sure you married the first time for the same reason? What happened? 😆

Originally posted by: Lalakhun1

You married because you want to spend your lives together, Im sure you married the first time for the same reason? What happened? 😆

People are not allowed to make mistakes?

Oh really, spare us the feminism. Why get married then with the pregnancy. Just like you dont need a marriage to get pregnant, you dont need marriage to raise a child. You need two agreeing responsible adults to raise a child. Sadly marriage does not guarantee that either. Either go all the way with your feminism or just say you too think being married is just the expected thing to do and so you too did go that route. These bolly people talk so much BS but the minute they get pregnant, they also get married like all sanskaari Indians.

She needs to be asked Why do women have to marry because they got pregnant.