In the blue diamond Stadium.
"He is here, finally he is here..."
"Awww he is sooo cute.."
"And soo handsome."
The crowd was cheering for him. For whom I don't know. I looked at simmi who were jumping on her seat to see the face of him. I sat there without any interest. I'm not a sports person and this simmi, she will die for it. I don't know how she can watch those boys fully covered with smelling sweats; yuck. I made a face at her over enthusiastic nature. I hate being happy, those were always short lived.
"Yippieee Sharon finally I saw him." I came out of my thoughts when she shook me with my shoulders.
"Huh. Who?"
"You were not watching." She asked with a weird face.
"No. Was that any matter to care?"
"Are you crazy, are you really a girl...?"
"You don't know the star player of the event. Every girl in India has crush over him and you are here telling me that you don't know him." She made a mess over it.
"I don't know him. Care to tell me." I asked her irritated.
"Ok ok. Don't get irritated."
"He is cute; he is a man with charm. He has everything that a girl can die for. He is handsome. When he plays we can only watch him. We could not take our eyes from him."
"Stop stop stop... don't exaggerate. Just say the name." that time I didn't know that minute could change my life and it did.
"His name is Swayam Shekawat."
The earth slipped out of my foot. My breath hitched at my throat. Someone squeezed my wind pipe. The air refused to enter into my system, I felt choked.
After some time the match started. Simmi continued to cheer for him, for my Swayam. The crowd followed her. I felt pure jealousy.
The moment I looked up my eyes got connected with his, for a moment he stood there immobile. He didn't move nor did I. The world stopped for us, to connect those two hearts, which refused to be with each other.
***
When I could not stand under his accusing gaze, I ran away from there.
"You can't run away from me Sharon. ...You can't do that again."
I stopped dead on my track. I did not have the guts to turn and look at his eyes. His blue eyes haunted me in day and night.
We stood there without moving for some time, after few minutes he effortlessly jerked me towards him. I crashed with his broad chest.
"Why were you running?"
"Sharon..." he said softly. I couldn't stop my self from looking at him.
He looked the same, the same old boy who made my life beautiful, who filled love in my pallid life, who taught me the meaning of love, my lover boy, my Swayam.
Have I ever had the right to call him mine?
May be No. I smiled at my fate. This guy standing in front of me, the only one who loved me, who cared about me... but what I did... I pushed him away. Just far away that he could not touch my heart again with his love, but distance was nothing he continued to do that without his own knowledge.
He held my chin with his two fingers.
"Won't you even smile at me Sharon?" He voice was so painful that I wanted to hug him so tight so that I can take his whole pain out.
"Swayam." I said quietly, if he was not this close to me then he would not hear what I said.
His arm tightened around my waist, he pulled me close to himself as it was possible.
We both stared at each other.
"I'm still in love with you Sharon."
That was enough for me to come to my real world. I pushed him harshly away from me. He stumbled back to few steps.
I once again tried to run away from him but before I do that he held my wrist firmly and said without waiting for me to turn.
"I still love you Sharon, after these seven years I still love you. And I will make sure that this time I get what I wanted"
After this he left my hand and I turned to see him but he was not there. He was gone.
***
"You love him Sharon, give it a chance."
I stared at Simmi as if she has grown into a witch. She is really crazy, she thinks, Sharon is in love, the Sharon rai prakash in love. Impossible.
"It is possible Sharon." her voice broke the silence of the room.
"Did I say that loud?" I said quietly.
"Yes you did." She smirked.
Her smirk grew wide when she came to know that I'm getting irritated.
"Simmi.. you go home we will talk later."
I crossed my arms across my chest and stood there looking at the woman who were giving me lectures about love.
Love is this, love is that... stupid thing!
"Love is not stupid Sharon."
"Haa. The most beautiful feeling." I quoted.
If I hate anything in this world then that will be that four letter word. "LOVE" the non existent word in my life, and I will not let any one to enter that in my world again.
"I hate it with a passion."
"What?"
"I hate the feeling love simmi."
"But why, you know its..."
"To know, to feel and to give we need to get it too. I can't give anything I don't know what is. And I can't feel it without knowing how it feels. I don't know how to give something which I never got."
"And how can you hate it without knowing how it feels?"
Her question made me speechless. I could not open my lips to reply to her.
"You are lying Miss Sharon; you are just afraid; just afraid to let him in. You are being so weak. Let your mask down and be a woman."
After this she stormed out off my room.
I stared at her back without blinking; I know I had started to cry by the time. She knows me so well.
I thought about my college days where I saw him first, where I fell for him, where he made me fall for him. Sever years passed, and he still love me,
Did I do anything wrong by hiding my feelings? I asked myself.
No Sharon, you didn't. He deserves happiness. And your happiness is short lived. Let him go.
My mind told me and I did the same. I let him go. I laid on my bed to sleep with his thoughts clouded my mind.
****
Somewhere else in the city:
"I will make you fall in love with me Sharon... again and this time I will tie you with me like you can't run away in your life time. This time I will make you accept it. You will not able to hide it anymore. I will bring it out. The all love that you had buried inside your heart...it's my promise on my love. And this is the last time I'm letting you to run away. From tomorrow you will face me anywhere anytime." Swayam said looking at her photo.
The tears had blurred his vision when he finished talking to her.
We are together forever by Ana
"I love you"
"I l-o-v-e"
"Mrs. Shekhawat? Mrs. Shekhawat?" He nudged her to gain her attention back.
"Yes.. Yes I'm here" she gathered herself. The sweat drops travelled through her back tingling her senses. He handed over his handkerchief. Sharon took it and wiped her face.
"Ma'am if you want we can have this interview some other time. It's completely alright." "Oh no vivan, it's OK. I guess someday it has to come out why not today." She took a deep breath and then continued "So as I was saying swayam shekhawat." She clutched her coffee mug and smiled at nothing in particular.
"Sharon! Sharon! Where are my keys" an irritated swayam screamed from the room. "Second drawer to your left." Sharon shouted from the kitchen. "But I already saw and.." He stopped. "And?" Sharon held a mug of coffee in her hand and entered the room smiling. "And let me guess, you didn't search it through my eyes." She continued speaking keeping the mug on the table. "Oh well I guess I would need you for that" Swayam by now had engulfed Sharon in his arms. He bored into her eyes and she looked on. The freckles of her hair, were disturbing her eyes to which he very softly moved it aside. "Swayam aren't you getting late for rehearsals?" Sharon asked bitting her lower lip. "Well I was. But I did figure out we have our duet rehearsals in the evening why not just shift for now" saying so he leaned forward making Sharon close her eyes. But the phone rang and broke their moment. "Sorry but it's rey" Swayam looked apologetic. "Ya I understand." Sharon smiled. "Yes rey, yes man I'm coming" he pecked sharons cheeks and left the house talking over phone. Sharon got back to her daily chores. After a while the landline rang which made Sharon's world go upside down. Swayam had meet with an accident and he was in the ICU. Sharon rushed to the hospital. "Doctor! Can I please meet him! Please!" "Yes Mrs. Shekawat but I doubt he has more time." She ran into the ICU and was devastated to see him like that. He pulled out his hand to reach her. She ran towards him and held his hand crying her eyes out." "I love you Sharon." He said smiling through all his pains as that was what made him happy. "I love you" Sharon cried her heart out kissing his palms. "I l-o-v-e" and the machine beeped a loud noise. That was the last words swayam said to Sharon. And that was the last he was going to say anything. He was dead.
"Thank you ma'am for Sharing swayam sirs life stroy with us. He was is and will always be the country's dancer. Ma'am this will be featured in our tuseday edition. Thank you for your time ma'am." saying so vivan left. Sharon locked the door behind her and walked towards the living room where his portrait lied. She stood and smiled staring at her husband's face. she tightened her grip on her shawl which she had wrapped around herself and spoke.
"I love you swayam"
You forgot to do something
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