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Shreya

@Wandering_mind

Navigator

+ 2

Posted: 8 years ago

#41

Reserved coz I have quite a bit to say!😊

*Unreserve*

Okay I know I have already said it twice but I am going to say it again that the flow is just impeccable. I love the way how one thing is leading to another so perfectly and its adding so much to the already appealing plot .

I really can't buy that this is your first FF! Brilliant work there:)

Moving on to the update, you potrayed Sharon so well here, her anxieties thinking about how she's going to survive in the alien family she's now become a part of is written so aptly.

Looking at Anjali's behavior I feel my perception about her was somewhat right. Although her actions are only aimed towards making Sharon familiar of the so called luxurious lifestyle she's gonna be living now ,there was a tinge of sweetness I felt. I don't find Anjali fake,she's just gotten herself adapted to this materialistic world to such a great extent that now the real feelings and emotions don't mean much to her.

Taani is still grey for me. She does seem a bit real and different from the weird family but still I couldn't understand her coldness towards Sharon considering that she does seem the most sensible one of the lot,as of now atleast. I have a feeling there's a reason for it,but lets put my imaginations to rest.

"You are my wife "

What was that? As much as Swayam was totally unbelievable here, I couldn't help but get a bad feeling about Vicky. What was Swayam hinting exactly with that possessive claim is unknown yet ,but I feel it was more for Vicky then Sharon.😲

The little conversation between Swayam and Sharon was interesting here. Swayam is becoming annoying but then I kind of liked the carefree attitude. Atleast there is no tension or ultimate hatred between them for starters.

"Couch, bathtub, floor - pick your favorite,"

This line was lol!! 🤣 He was really mean here,but then I couldn't help but laugh. He was weirdly funny(if that even makes sense :P. Sharon sulking and cursing him is totally understood !

To top it on ,planning for the grand party is going to be a tough task looking at the amount of stuff she's got to take care of!

If first day was like this, I wonder what the rest are going to be like!..

Looking forward to some more adventures in Sharon's life with the mad family.Also Swayam needs to come in the spotlight now,I'm sure there's lots to explore in there.

Superb work !! 👍🏼 :)Update super soon and PM me please:)

Love,

Shreya

Edited by Spark.Shreya - 8 years ago

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SHAhira-Swaron

@SHAhira-Swaron

Dazzler

Posted: 8 years ago

#42

Im jst glued wid ur stry.the use f wrds the way u potray der emotions der pov its jst blows my mind idk hw sharon is gng to live correction survive n dis famly i wnt to knw swayam pov nd d lst prt ws d highlight "couch bathtub floor pck ur fav" lol upd sn

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ErisedWitch45

@ErisedWitch45

Dazzler

+ 5

Posted: 8 years ago

#43

Originally posted by: tinku82
One word Awesome...👏
Cant imagine Swayam giving cold shoulder to Sharon...
but liked the part where she ask
" Where do i sleep?"
to his reply...😉
" Couch, bathtub, floor - pick your favourite...😆
But 1 thng for sure Shekhawats will b a tough shell for her...

Thanks for reading! Sharon does have a tough road to navigate. 😊

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ErisedWitch45

@ErisedWitch45

Dazzler

+ 5

Posted: 8 years ago

#44

Originally posted by: sneharay
Nice update.. 👍🏼
please give more swaron moments..

Thanks for reading. More SwaRon moments- got it 👍🏼

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ErisedWitch45

@ErisedWitch45

Dazzler

+ 5

Posted: 8 years ago

#45

Originally posted by: Rockingbhardwaj
Neha is assigned to sharon...
Oh god..
What a weird family...

I am loving sharon here..
She put up a small fight...
Nice..

Hope tasha get along soon..

Sharon love you girl...

Update soon

Thanks for reading. Shekhwats are not exactly the conventional family here. :D

As far as the family situation goes, Taani and Sharon are like 2 peas in a pod.

Next part will be updated pretty soon! Thanks again. :)

Quote

ErisedWitch45

@ErisedWitch45

Dazzler

+ 5

Posted: 8 years ago

#46

Originally posted by: ..MiStLeToE..
"Where do I sleep then?" Sharon asked.

"Couch, bathtub, floor - pick your favorite," 🤣

This one is my fav moment. I was so cracked up looking at Swayam's indifference with which he said this. 🤣

The situation must be so wierd for Sharon. I mean even in my imaginations it just gets wierd to wierder.

The way she is being treated in the Shekhawat house leaves me Speechless in a shocking way. Every encounter, every conversation so materialistic, flaunting arrogance and power in an uncanny way -_-

Where Swayam goes all aggressive at Vicky I was like Whoa! What just happened? Got a soft Swayam inside you? And then he explained it to her, 'MY WIFE!'

All the delusions of Sharon and mine went poof and I think we both landed on earth!!!

And the last conversation of them in room, I dont know why but his indifference to Sharon makes me laugh at him maybe because I really dont know if he was for real and I would have been in place of Sharon, how on earth I would deal with him! Its unconvienent for him to sleep in Guest room. Right! [((]

I hope Taani gives her a chance because she is the only real person she has got in that house, as of now!

And dude Swayam Shekhawat is getting on my nerves already and given my love for him thats saying something! Kudos to your writing on his and Shekhawat's charcterisation B|

Chitra :)

Hey Chitra,

I am glad you enjoyed this chapter and thanks a ton for reviewing it.

The Shekhwats are a crazy bunch of people, extended family included :D Taani is different from the other members and I love a nice girls-bonding story, so hopefully that will be explored.

I know this Swayam is very different from D3 Swayam (hence AU). But despite this you like the story and this makes me smile.

Thanks again for reviewing. I hope the you enjoy the future updates too!

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ErisedWitch45

@ErisedWitch45

Dazzler

+ 5

Posted: 8 years ago

#47

Originally posted by: Spark.Shreya
Reserved coz I have quite a bit to say!😊
*Unreserve*

Okay I know I have already said it twice but I am going to say it again that the flow is just impeccable. I love the way how one thing is leading to another so perfectly and its adding so much to the already appealing plot .
I really can't buy that this is your first FF! Brilliant work there:)

Moving on to the update, you potrayed Sharon so well here, her anxieties thinking about how she's going to survive in the alien family she's now become a part of is written so aptly.

Looking at Anjali's behavior I feel my perception about her was somewhat right. Although her actions are only aimed towards making Sharon familiar of the so called luxurious lifestyle she's gonna be living now ,there was a tinge of sweetness I felt. I don't find Anjali fake,she's just gotten herself adapted to this materialistic world to such a great extent that now the real feelings and emotions don't mean much to her.

Taani is still grey for me. She does seem a bit real and different from the weird family but still I couldn't understand her coldness towards Sharon considering that she does seem the most sensible one of the lot,as of now atleast. I have a feeling there's a reason for it,but lets put my imaginations to rest.

"You are my wife "
What was that? As much as Swayam was totally unbelievable here, I couldn't help but get a bad feeling about Vicky. What was Swayam hinting exactly with that possessive claim is unknown yet ,but I feel it was more for Vicky then Sharon.😲

The little conversation between Swayam and Sharon was interesting here. Swayam is becoming annoying but then I kind of liked the carefree attitude. Atleast there is no tension or ultimate hatred between them for starters.

"Couch, bathtub, floor - pick your favorite,"
This line was lol!! 🤣 He was really mean here,but then I couldn't help but laugh. He was weirdly funny(if that even makes sense :P. Sharon sulking and cursing him is totally understood !

To top it on ,planning for the grand party is going to be a tough task looking at the amount of stuff she's got to take care of!

If first day was like this, I wonder what the rest are going to be like!..

Looking forward to some more adventures in Sharon's life with the mad family.Also Swayam needs to come in the spotlight now,I'm sure there's lots to explore in there.

Superb work !! 👍🏼 :)Update super soon and PM me please:)

Love,
Shreya

Hi Shreya,

Thanks so much for this amazing response!

It really makes me happy to know that you (and other) are liking the story. And your description (this one and previous) of Anjali is right. I didn't set out to write her as an out-right negative person. She does have her moments though :D

Swayam in this story is very different from Shantanu's Swayam in D3, hence the need for AU. I am planning to write some parts from different character's POV, like Taani had a small one in this and Anjali had in part 2, but majority will be from Sharon's. Swayam's POV is something that I am working on.

I will be updating soon. Hope you like the upcoming parts too!

Thanks again :)

Quote

ErisedWitch45

@ErisedWitch45

Dazzler

+ 5

Posted: 8 years ago

#48

Originally posted by: SHAhira-Swaron
Im jst glued wid ur stry.the use f wrds the way u potray der emotions der pov its jst blows my mind idk hw sharon is gng to live correction survive n dis famly i wnt to knw swayam pov nd d lst prt ws d highlight "couch bathtub floor pck ur fav" lol upd sn

Thanks for reading and reviewing. :)

Sharon sure has a long way to go. I am working on Swayam's POV but major portions will be from Sharon's POV only.

I am working on the next part. Should be up pretty soon.

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Anu_TanHa

@Anu_TanHa

Stunner

Posted: 8 years ago

#49

Awesome update beautifully penned down.

I'm liking the way you portraying sharon's character, i always liked sharon as strong person.

U have dress up properly for breakfast now this is some real crazy family 😆, They are more like to show off and live false life more keen to protect their repo.🤢

I never thought swayam would be like this but i think he actually is not like this and only pretend to be rude to hide hurt(something related to swayam-rey past) Bilkul khadoos nikla poor sharon 😆. For a sec i was so happy that yeah i hero protected his princess but muh khola aur sab barbad ker diya 😆

Is vicky in negative character 😳

And i'm getting a feeling that ryt now sharon might be feeling that her sasu ma is better than other "the shekhawats" but in future she'll be the one creating mu's between SwaRon.😛😆

Overall loved the update and i liking how story moving ahead. It will be treat to read how this cold hearted swayam will fall for sharon and she will own his heart

Update soon pretty soon

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mythreyii

@mythreyii

Navigator

Posted: 8 years ago

#50

Hola

Amazing amazing and amazing

This is jus amazing.u killed it seriously

Sharon's reaction on a girl being there to help her and the wardrobe part..

All the more funny yet sad truth was the dress code for breakfast that literally shocked and confused her.

U have described the scenes in simple yet connectable way that adds charm to the ff.

Sharon's character was highlighted when she asks her to call her Sharon by name when no one is around

U wrote Sharon beautifully here

Well undoubtedly u justify every character to the point.

The convo in breakfast table was crazy.

Taani is one another character that is yet to be explored.

I feel she could be the one with sharon in the house.

Anjali is certainly a success oriented woman who wants things under her control as is ppl.

Well Sharon is going to have a hard time arranging party.

What I like the most in the ff is how u managed to describe the business life style of the ppl. U have caught it right .

And swayum fight with Vicky was shocking though his answer cleared the shock.

I love the way its all from Sharon POV which was lacking in the show according to me . it was much of swayum.

Swayums last lines are the best..

P.s. I have not seen d3 from initial days.

It was after 2 years of the show did I c it . but still Sharon was what I loved. And still could understand the complication of her.

Lovely ff update soonish.

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