Originally posted by: Spark.Shreya
You know your chapters are more like episodes!.. I can actually see everything happening for real and it is truly a visual treat as well! I am so loving the build up!
Every chapter brings out undiscovered traits of both Swayam and Sharon and surely it makes this ff a very engaging read.It was pretty much predictable in the previous chapter that Swayam would be avoiding Sharon as he can't let her peep into his insides.She had begun affecting him and that thought was enough for him to feel uneasy, but I was pleasantly surprised to see some noticeable changes in Swayam's behavior towards the end.He wasn't able to avoid Sharon's questions but what was surprising was he didn't try hard to.It was easier for him to just walk off and avoid her but it gladdens me to see his heart overpower his mind..One moment he was trying to ignore her questions ,next moment he was apologizing for being so careless ...and in yet another one he was lending her an ear as she spilled out her deepest fears and consoling her almost forgetting about his own.He didn't even realize that maybe, but it was one rare glimpse of the 'sweet Swayam' which couldn't go unnoticed.As for Sharon, Swayam is far more than just 'okayish' for her which is very much evident with the way she was scared to death in just two hours of his absence.Like I said earlier I love her majorly cuz she is never pretentious.She voiced out her anxiety without a second thought to Swayam.She let him know that she cares and doesn't regret it.He's much more to her than she even thinks ,perhaps that is why she could let out her secrets with so much ease that it really felt like she desired to do so even though it appears as an act just to persuade Swayam for the same.And with the revelation now,I am really curious how this truth is going to affect their lives,particularly Sharon as the thought of Swayam in love with someone else, whichever tense that is , is going to be very disturbing for her I think. Can't wait for the realizations to hit both their hearts.Commendable work once more!..I am so glued to this!!!...Update sooon!~Shreya
Originally posted by: .ButterflyNeet.
I can't help but applause that within such little time you caused such beautiful chemistry to develop. Absolutely in love with the plot of this story and more so with your Swayam, i think his past love will be so interesting to explore and i can't wait to see how his relationship with Kriya was. Rey is quite amazing in this chapter for me to because i like the relationship he has with Sharon or at least he is building on. The way you make your readers heart wrench is amazing, simply can't wait to read more!
Neet <3
Originally posted by: SHAhira-Swaron
Sry..bck to d updte t ws jst splend nd a ltl unprdctble fr me thou SWAREY convo ws nce nd wen she sd ds to swyum i gsd he wl be drunk nd i also gsd dat he mght blrt out bt fish nd den hs angr bt den also he didnt atlst t ws an emtnl outbrk gsh tq nd pm me
Chapter 19 - Aftershocks
"Kria?" Sharon repeated even though she had heard clearly the first time, "How? When?"
Swayam sighed, reminiscing about old times, "It feels like ages. I was 18, in the 1st year of college. Kria was in the same college, different class. She used to wait tables at the college caf, her part time job. That is where we met. She was funny and adorable; so full of life. I was, well, different than I am now. I was outgoing, had many friends..."
Taani had told Sharon this, "You were popular, I know."
Swayam scoffed, "I was a fool."
"What happened?"
"Well, what usually happens? We fell in love. Earlier I was infatuated with a girl in school but I knew, with Kria it was different. I was experiencing emotions which I never had. I was in love with her, the first girl who had stolen my heart, the first girl I had kissed, the first girl with whom I-," Swayam paused.
"I... got it... your first time... okay," Sharon responded, feeling uneasy. That was too much information.
He went on, "We were together for 4 years - 4 long years. I won't lie - those were some of the best years of my life. We were very happy. We were young, filled with zeal and ideas; the world was our oyster. I didn't have any plans of joining the family business then. I wanted to make my own success, or at least do something that I enjoyed."
"Which was?" Sharon asked.
"That's not important," he replied. "Anyway, I was deeply in love with her. I was young, not to mention stupid so after 4 years of being together, I asked her to marry me."
"What!" Sharon blurted, "You wanted to marry when you were 22?"
"Like I said," he asserted, "I was stupid. She refused my proposal too - the marriage part. She said we were too young. Another reason was my parents were trying to get me to join the business, something which I despised, so we planned to elope. We planned on travelling the length and breadth of the country- together as a couple."
"And how did you plan on supporting yourself during this adventure? Financially, I mean," Sharon inquired.
"We decided to do odd jobs here and there, whatever came our way. We weren't thinking straight. We had rosy colored glasses on our eyes," he smiled, "just like in movies."
Sharon shrugged her shoulders, "Frankly I can't picturize you like that, so carefree, such an optimist."
"A couple of days before we were supposed to embark on this great adventure she asked me to meet her. I thought she was getting jittery because let's face it, we had just graduated and we were very young. But imagine my surprise when she told me that she was breaking up with me."
"Why?"
"Beats me. Till this day I don't know why. Just 1 night ago she was telling me how excited she was and how much she loved me and the next evening, in less than 24 hours, she dumped me," Swayam concluded.
"Just like that? She must have said something," Sharon urged him.
He shook his head, "Nothing. She just said it was over. I was in shock, to say the least. I kept hounding her for answers. 4 years we were together and suddenly she was leaving me. It just broke me. I know I sound like a sissy. I was supposed to be strong."
"There was nothing wrong with your reaction," Sharon encouraged him, "crying doesn't make you weak. You were in love with her, for 4 years. I would be surprised if you didn't cry."
"The worst part was the lack of closure. I didn't know what happened. For months I kept repeating all our interactions in my mind again and again. I went through each little detail- trying to find what went wrong. Did I misbehave with her? Did I hurt her unknowingly? I couldn't eat or sleep properly." His voice became hoarse.
"I don't know if you ever had your heart broken," he looked at Sharon, "but it sucks. I was in excruciating pain. I couldn't focus on anything. It tore me apart from inside. I crawled into a corner, figuratively speaking, to seek some solace. Kria, was a waitress by then, at an upmarket restaurant. I went there a few times, pleading her for some answers. But I got nothing. There was a huge hole in my heart. The pain was too much, I couldn't bear it. Weeks passed and I remained the same. I was still stuck in that day. Everything was moving around me, and I was at a standstill. To take my mind off the hollowness, I joined my parents' office and it helped. I made myself so busy in work, I didn't have time to think anything else."
"Swayam," Sharon uttered, "I am so sorry, you had to go through all that. Why didn't you tell anyone?"
"Taani was too young and my parents were never interested in my love life. The large circle of friends that I had, slowly slipped away and I didn't even realize."
"I have never been in love, so I can't imagine what you went through...," she sympathized.
He laughed, "That was the best thing that happened to me."
"Excuse me?"
"I was a fool, an idiot. I let her walk over me. After this entire episode, I realized how love can make you so weak," he sneered, "How it can almost ruin your life. I was saved that time due to work. I felt liberated, like no one could control me anymore. I wouldn't give any one so much power over me. No one would ever make me feel so worthless like Kria had. I would not let anyone trample over me."
"Swayam," Sharon began, "just because it happened once, doesn't mean you'll lock yourself in a cage. People fall in love, they get their heart broken, they rebound and move on."
"She crushed me Sharon," Swayam spoke, infuriated, "Because I let her. Say what you will but no one should ever hold that kind of power over you. You shouldn't let anyone."
"It's not a power game," she corrected him, "It's love. There is no logic or strategy in it."
He snickered, "You are so naive. Love is the biggest game we play. Look at us, look at our marriage. For the world we are a couple who have a fairy tale life but we know the reality."
She agreed, "We are not the ideal example of people in love but tell me Swayam, if you really think you are liberated now that you are no longer in shackles, why did Rey and Kria's wedding news affect you so much? You say that you don't want anyone to have that kind of power over you but from what I can see, Kria can still pull your strings, even when she is not in your life."
"That is not..." he tried to counter her.
"You are still holding on to the past, to that hatred. You are trying very hard to be someone that you are not. And that is why it's affecting you. You are still stuck in that time Swayam, everyone has moved on... except you," Sharon said.
Sharon gulped before asking, "Are you still in love with her?"
"No!" Swayam answered immediately and for some reason Sharon relaxed. "I hate her Sharon, I despise her."
"There is a fine line between love and hate," she said.
"Love doesn't exist for me Sharon. Like I said, it is a weakness and I will not let it have a power over me." He replied, coldly.
His voice sent chills down her spine. A moment ago she was relieved that he didn't love Kria but hearing his views on love, she felt tensed. She didn't expect him to open up to her, but he had. And now he was back to being his old self.
His honesty scared her.
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Swayam took his leave later that afternoon, leaving behind a very pensive Sharon. She was still in her room, going over what she had unearthed. Swayam had his heart terribly crushed by Kria, it drove him away from everyone. He despised her and took out his frustration on others, on his work and on himself.
Sharon was specializing in Cardiology - the science of heart, yet when it came to Swayam she couldn't make sense of it. He hated Kria to such an extent that even her sight or any news about her bothered him. She was relieved to know that he didn't love Kria anymore, but her relief had soon turned into anxiety when she realized he was incapable of feeling like that for any other girl - including her. She couldn't understand why it hurt her. She was not expecting anything more from their relationship yet his words troubled her.
She wanted answers and who better to satiate her curiosity than Kria herself, the source of all this mess.
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Sharon met a very busy Kria in her restaurant. It was dinner time - rush hour on Monday. She agreed to take out a few minutes for Sharon.
"We are in the process of starting late night delivery," Kria was speaking excitedly, "after 11pm till 5am. Many restaurants are trying it. There is untapped potential in this sector- there are many BPOs with night shifts nearby, so I hope it works out."
Sharon nodded, nervously. How was she supposed to start the conversation? Kria had a tumultuous affair with her husband and was now going to marry her brother - not exactly the perfect opening sentence.
"So," Kria spoke after a few seconds of silence, "What did you want to talk about?"
"Umm...," Sharon began, apprehensively, "You and... Swayam?"
Kria raised her eyebrow and let out a nervous laugh,"I don't know what you mean."
Sharon interjected, tired of the charade, "Kria, I have been racking my brains all day, I am very tired, so let's just cut the crap and get to the point, please."
Kria shut her eyes for a second, rearranging her thoughts, "Who told you?"
Sharon was about to say Swayam but stopped. She gave Kria an incredulous look, "Who else knows apart from you and Swayam?"
Kria smiled, grimly. And Sharon knew the answer before Kria spoke, "Anjali."
"Of course - Anjali. I don't know why it didn't strike before," Sharon pondered, "I want to know from you Kria, what happened all of a sudden? Why did you leave him? What changed in 1 night?"
"Look, before I say anything, I want you to know that my feelings for Swayam were genuine, at the time. I really liked him a lot," Kria asserted.
"But you didn't love him?"
"I was only 18 when we started dating," Kria said, exasperated, "By 22 he wanted me to marry him. He was too serious. I liked him, a lot, it might have grown in to love..."
"But you were willing to elope. To go on your dream tour," Sharon felt like a reporter, structuring her questions.
"Yes! It was a great plan. We would take time off, travel all over India for a year."
"Then what happened?"
"I woke up from the dream," Kria remarked.
"In 1 night?" Sharon asked, with skepticism.
Kria replied, "Anjali Shekhwat helped me wake up. Apparently she knew all about our affair. She just wasn't too bothered because she thought her son was going through a phase, but when she got to know about our plans to leave everything and travel, all red flags were raised."
Sharon shrugged, "What did she do?"
"She showed me the truth," Kria stated, "People like you and Swayam were born with a silver spoon in your mouth. You didn't even have to do a day's hard work in your entire life. You had all the comforts and luxuries. But people like me- we don't get that choice, we have to make our own future."
Kria's eyes started tearing-up, "Swayam could take a year long holiday, try his hand at anything. If he failed, all he had to do is go back to his parents and they would make everything all right- Just like you got admission in IMC without having to bat an eyelid. You have everything handed down to you on a platter. If I had made the same choice, of leaving my full time waitressing job, I wouldn't have had any support. And what if Swayam decided to break up with me after a year, I would be without a job, no security and penniless. I would have to start from scratch."
Sharon listened to Kria each and every word. The voice was Kria's but the words were Anjali. After spending 4 months in the Shekhawat house, she could see very well through her mother-in-law's manipulation.
"So," Sharon reasoned, "Anjali showed you the harsh realities of life and you broke up with him? That doesn't add up."
"Well," Kria said, taking a deep breath, "she compensated me, generously."
Sharon jumped out of her skin, "She paid you money?"
Kria nodded.
Sharon's faced contoured in disgust, "And you accepted. Wow."
Kria protested, "I was 22. That kind of money was enough to literally make my life. I invested it in this restaurant. I made a life for me."
"By crushing Swayam," Sharon remarked.
"What was I supposed to do?" Kria demanded, "Say no to Anjali. And for what? A guy, whom I didn't even know if I loved."
"You were supposed to be honest to him. He loved you, like crazy, He wanted to marry you and you took money... I can't believe it," Sharon shook her head.
Kria spoke grimly, "It's easy for you to say Sharon. The world is not as black and white as you think it is. We have to make compromises and sacrifices. Every day is a challenge for us."
"Oh please," Sharon retorted, "stop your melodrama. My dad worked hard to start his company, even the Shekhwats did. I work hard every day to become a doctor. You don't get to play the victim card here Kria. I just can't believe Swayam forgave his mom for this."
"Swayam doesn't know," Kria responsed,"Till date he has no inkling that his mother was involved. Anjali wanted to keep it that way."
"Of course she did," Sharon snarled, "You know Kria, I have always admired you, looked up to you even. I thought you were so strong, running your own restaurant at this age. You inspired me at times. But now when I look at you, I see a scheming and cunning woman. I find you repulsive."
Kria put her head in her hands, "Sharon I told you the truth because sooner or later, it would have come out." She paused in thought and then spoke again, "Rey... he doesn't know... so please don't tell him."
Sharon looked at Kria, "And why not?"
"Because I love him, I really do," Kria emphasized.
Sharon scoffed, "Till a better offer comes along."
Kria pleaded; desperation evident in her voice, "Sharon please, I beg you. Don't drag Rey into this. We are very happy together."
Sharon shook her head, "I can't hide this from my brother. He has a right to know. You can't build a marriage on deception."
"Like your marriage is?" Kria mocked.
"Say what you will about my marriage, but we went in with our eyes open. No one deceived anyone," Sharon claimed.
"It was a deal, for God sake's," Kria spoke, "it was all a deception. Shekhwats and Singhanias did it for financial gain. I did the same thing 4 years back. How is it any different? How do you have the moral high-ground to judge me?"
"You can twist this argument all you want Kria," Sharon stood up from the chair, "But Rey has to know. Either you tell him, or I will. You have a day to decide."
Sharon left. She didn't look back at Kria, who was now crying.
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Originally posted by: yadnyasawant
pls update
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