"If a system at equilibrium is disturbed by some change, the system will shift in a direction to minimize or undo the effect change." -Lee Chatelier's Principle
JULY 2015 (Four months ago), China
The equilibrium had been disturbed ever since that meet in the coffee shop, especially from Swayam's side. He was glad to be on an official trip, away from India, from her. The events of the past few days had made him slightly uneasy. To be fair, it was perfectly normal. She was his friend, a mutually acknowledged fact, who had some sorrows in life; naturally he'd want to comfort her. That is what friends were supposed to do, weren't they? Wasn't that the very social contract? What didn't fit in his rationalization was the kiss. The crying made sense, the comfort made sense, the kiss made none of it. He couldn't think of a reason to explain why they had kissed in his dream.
He drummed his fingers impatiently on the wooden table.
Perhaps, he could.
Sharon had been extremely vulnerable and beautiful, he had been very kind and empathetic. It was possible that his brain had decided to romanticize the situation and in the end, it was just a dream. Dreams never meant anything. It was completely normal for a man to dream about kissing a girl, wasn't it?
Wasn't it?
He gave a deep sigh.
--
India
It had become awkward and Sharon didn't like it. She had just gotten back to being a step closer to her old self and the sudden glitch in their relationship had proven to be a setback. She sighed. Maybe she shouldn't have pushed him to reveal his past? Any other person, she'd have bit her tongue than ask them but with Swayam she didn't know why she did. Perhaps it was because she knew that however big an arse he may be, he had a good heart, a kind heart.
You need to be willing to give if you're going to take, Sharon.
She didn't know if she could. It was too big a risk to take. Lost in her thoughts, she jumped as her phone blared.
"Hello?"
"Ready to give Sharon?"
--
They sat across the table placed in the centre of her living room. She had been surprised to see him stand outside her door, bouncing on the balls of his feet, clearly nervous. She surely didn't expect him to turn up at her door at 11 pm. She gazed at him, drinking in his features. In a state of sleep induced haziness, she found herself thinking how devastatingly handsome he was. His eyes; his esoteric brown eyes, made her heart flutter like a kingfisher. His long brown hair urged her to run her fingers through them and his thin mouth invited her, the smile on his face enchanted her. His tall and lean frame didn't help either and she accepted that she was attracted to him, physically.
He caught her staring at him and averted his gaze before she could realise she'd been caught. Swayam felt his cheeks warming as he felt her stare on him. This discomfort in the air was a new event and just as uncomfortable. He was incredibly nervous as the weight of what they were planning to do hit him. There was no turning back from this, he realised. Revealing their deepest secrets to the other would cement their bond for a long time, there was no walking away in the middle.
"Are you sure you want to do this? I do not wish to force you."
Sharon stared at Swayam. Was she ready? But then, that wasn't the correct question. Was she ready enough? Probably, yes. He had overcome his own apprehensions to reach her and she wasn't going to turn him away. It was only fair for her to let out her cats; who knew, it could possibly help.
"Don't you think it's too late for that question? You're already here."
"I could go, if that's what you want."
"No...I think I can do this. Which reminds me would you like to have a drink?"
"Alcoholic?"
Sharon shifted a bit in her seat. "I've got scotch, thought it'd ease our nerves a bit."
He let a loud chuckle and grinned at her "Yes please"
--
"Look at us Sharon" Swayam said, his voice drawling "We are halfway through the bottle and no one has said anything yet. How pathetic."
Sharon shifted a bit on the couch and looked sideways at Swayam. "I..I can't go first. It has to be you. I-"
"It's okay, I'll start."
He didn't know if he really wanted to, but he couldn't turn back now. The wheels had been set in motion. Swayam pushed his hand into his right pant pocket and fished out a platinum ring. Sharon looked at it curiously. It was beautiful; a thin band with a simple motif engraved on it.
"I was engaged, three months ago. It was flowers and violins; and balloons as the movies show. I was indeed very happy."
"Then?"
"Then, hell broke loose." he clenched his fists tightly. "I caught her cheating, with my cousin."
"Oh, Swayam." Sharon sighed and took his hand in hers, squeezing it gently "I'm sorry."
APRIL 2015 (Seven Months ago)
He had been such a fool, such a big fool to trust her. He should have known better, he should have seen the signs, should've understood when his brother had asked him about her. He let his head drop into his hands and felt tears leaking out of his eyes. He couldn't help but wondering, for the first time in his life; why him? He had loved her so much and...she had loved him back. How the hell did this mess happen then?
The door of his apartment creaked open and he looked up to see her walk in, the only sign of any guilt being the loss of confidence in her stride. Swayam was crushed at that realization and it made him want to cower on the floor in fetal position, perhaps cry it all out.
She came up in front of him and he was shocked and angry to see pity in her face. Just as he opened his mouth to lash out, he heard a metallic cling and stopped. He moved his gaze to the table and figuratively felt himself blown into smithereens. The ring, which he had lovingly bought for her, with which he had claimed his right, now lay forlorn against the dark paint of his table; much like him.
"I'm sorry." she whispered, sympathetically.
He gulped.
"I hate you. Please, go away."
He watched her walk out the door of his apartment and the door of his life, before falling into the inevitable spiral of misery. This was it for him; never again was he going to subject himself to all this torture.
Never again.
Edited by Rhapsody. - 8 years ago
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