From Oprah winfrey -- for gauri. - Page 2

Originally posted by: woman11

I don't think there are many of us who celebrate our enemy's misfortune and cry at their success, no matter how much we hate them!!

Actually woman11, I am such a person -- I have five times celebrated my enemy's misfortune -- (threw really large parties too! ) and also cried at their success. I hated them with a venegeance. I understand gauri well.

Originally posted by: khusi_*

Yes, j's concern for A is a factor for g's irritations to wards A but definitely not a solo reason. She has the problem with A coz for anandi only she was rejected on child hood. more than concern it is that matter of rejection plus her own nature!

Yes ! Gauri still has not forgotten the childhood rejection which was done to her. But J's behavior is not really helping the situation. J could have gone to save A - but even before that, J has been showing concern for A (where his concern was not even acknowledged by family) and it was crystal clear to G.

Today's episode showed G's reason for frustration in a clear manner - Jag's lies 😉 Waise, it's good that she has ultimately taken a decision what to do with Jag's lies - as of now she has decided to accept his lies. 😉 Let's see how long she can continue with it.


@ tinoo - seriously?!!!! well, if you are serious I must congratulate you for your brutal honesty.😃 Waise, what I have seen in my life is that most people gets upset with enemies' success and gets joyous with enemies' failure. So it's not uncommon. Less number of people remain unaffected and there are rare souls who truly wish good for enemy,


@woman11 -

G went to J because she thought she can put A's prestige down before J !

One of the main reasons to make A down before J is Js' concern! As khusi said, G's dislike for A is also for her childhood rejection, nevertheless, J's concern for A in Jetsar and his list of lies before G is not helping the situation either.

I would rather call it jealousy instead of sadism. If jealousy makes people sadist, then it's another matter because most people do enjoy enemies downfall. 😉

G would never have been happy if A was really raped or molested or killed - because then how come A's prestige be down before J?

G's main aim is to stop J and others worshiping A. 😉 So, she felt that she has ultimately got the opportunity to bring down A in front of J after hearing her "elopement"


That's why I am saying if J would have shown little less concern for A and be honest to G completely, then things would not have been so bad,

Originally posted by: doyelpakhi

[@ tinoo - seriously?!!!! well, if you are serious I must congratulate you for your brutal honesty.😃 Waise, what I have seen in my life is that most people gets upset with enemies' success and gets joyous with enemies' failure. So it's not uncommon. Less number of people remain unaffected and there are rare souls who truly wish good for enemy,

ahh!! OK ..so complex is human psychology. :)

absolutely it is :)

tinoo: i really admire your honesty. Yes, I do personally know people who rejoice at even deaths in their enemy's family! I have also felt satisfied at the misfortune of an enemy of mine, but that's because that girl had consciously done severe harm to me. And when she suffered for her own actions, I felt satisfied as justice was meted out. But such sense of rejoice arises from a sense of retribution, not so much from jealousy. However, I guess it all varies from person to person, and depends on how intense your hatred is.😊

Doyelpakhi: I think people who can wish good for their enemies are pretty rare. My take would be indifference. If I hate someone, I would rather not take interest in his or her life, the best is to keep distance from such a person whom I can't stand. I will not make good wishes for them, but yes I will not rejoice at their misfortune, unless I see it as a retribution.

The point of retribution is a different dynamics altogether. If I feel somebody has done me harm consciously and start hating them as a result, then I will want that person to be punished for his/her deeds. In such a case, I will rejoice at the misfortune of my enemy because I see the misfortune as a punishment for bad deeds----the whole concept of "jaisi karni waisi bharni", poetic justice, divine intervention etc etc.

But for Gauri, Anandi's misfortune is not a punishment for the conscious harm Anandi has done to Gauri. She hates Anandi simply out of jealousy, not because Anandi has consciously done something to her. So there is no point for Gauri to rejoice that Anandi is paying for her deeds. That's why I see her intense hatred as sadism. It's pretty OTT if you wish bad for the person you are jealous of----it's almost like wishing for a thunder to strike down my neighbor's house because I am jealous that her house is prettier !!

But anyway, we all are going to differ on this. I guess we all make judgments on these characters based our personal perceptions, so we will keep disagreeing.

Originally posted by: woman11

I disagree on the arguments for Gauri's defense for the following reasons:

1. Jagya did not know about Anandi's abduction. As soon as Gauri heard the news, she couldn't wait for him to come home. She had to brave her own pregnant state, take a taxi and go and inform the news as a spicy gossip. If Gauri had remained indifferent and totally unconcerned about Anandi, it would have still made sense. But celebrating and relishing somebody else's infamy , even of the person you hate, is sadism. Ironically, it's Gauri's allegations against Anandi that drove Jagya to the rescue mission.

2. Why did Gauri cry when she heard Anandi had not run away and Jagya saved her? The only possible interpretation is that she was hoping Anandi will be defamed in front of Jagya and the whole family. Again, I would say that it is possible for a person to feel dislike, anger, contempt for the person she hates. But to wish that something bad should actually happen to my enemy, and to get upset when it doesn't, is the height of sadism.

Gauri's hatred for Anandi might have a reason, but the magnitude of her hatred makes her inhuman. I don't think there are many of us who celebrate our enemy's misfortune and cry at their success, no matter how much we hate them!!

i agree wid u!! and i also bcum happy on seeing my enemy getting punishment but just like u said as a retribution or 4 justice sake & not bcoz he/shes my enemy. many ppl bcum enemy of human beings in his lifetime but its not essential that they r always wrong. sumtimes a prsns thinks wat he/shes doing is rite but its also possible that in terms of huamnity or morality(basic things & not like live-ins or homosexuality which always keeps on changing wid tiem) is wrong!!

Originally posted by: woman11

absolutely it is :)



But for Gauri, Anandi's misfortune is not a punishment for the conscious harm Anandi has done to Gauri. She hates Anandi simply out of jealousy, not because Anandi has consciously done something to her. So there is no point for Gauri to rejoice that Anandi is paying for her deeds. That's why I see her intense hatred as sadism. It's pretty OTT if you wish bad for the person you are jealous of----it's almost like wishing for a thunder to strike down my neighbor's house because I am jealous that her house is prettier !!

But anyway, we all are going to differ on this. I guess we all make judgments on these characters based our personal perceptions, so we will keep disagreeing.

That's what jealousy is 😉 If X is jealous of Y's shirt, then he would be happy if Y loses that shirt. Yes - jealous can lead to sadistic pleasure.

Gauri is jealous of everyone praising A; she knows that even J thinks highly of A. So she will be happy if there is any one opportunity when people can bash A,

I know that we will differ in this topic, but I would again like to repeat that,G is extremely jealous of A's "popularity" among everyone and hence tries to find flaws in her.

If ever news come that A is having accident or she is being molested (God forbid), G would not be happy - she would remain indifferent instead of being happy. But of course, if J starts showing concern for A, then there would be other complications. 😉

Well, cannot understand G. Had A harmed/injured her? Had she invited her to be her 'enemy'? If anyone has reason to cry foul on an action, ( J and Gs arbitrary discard on their pet pretext 'Balvivah), it's A. But she struggles to keep her injury private and tries her best to refrain from indicting anyone-(neither G/J nor her elders- much as some dismiss this as unreal holiness there is some consistent hint within her original positive sketch)-other than society's ill custom. In fact it is she who had lent any support to J/G's 'balvivah' cries- not only by lip service dialogues but by actively refusing to take any legal action, in spite of instigations by enraged elders or malicious provocations by same G. In perusal of her take of society's ill custom, she continues to stay sympathetic to J. She supports THEIR- and not only HIS- financial needs. What more proofs of a benign stand can she keep on feeding Gauri to detox her? More than inventing A's 'normality'- read 'defects'- she should introspect her own jealousy and rivalry which no one but her own self has braced with open arms.

Jagya was nt honest frm begining and even she knows that. Just for sake of his image he was hidding the fact that he is married in clg. We can understand that its shamful 4 any guy to admit that he is married in clg life but dnt understand y he changed his name. He never told gauri that his real name is jagdish nt jagat even when they were in relationship. Gauri accepted him after knowing everything abt him. So y she is so much surprised? Was she expecting something extra ordinary frm him? The guy who cant remain loyal with a gal who took bullet on her head just to save him than how could she expect that he will remain faithful with her? Everything was clear before marriage but still she was ready to accept him. Even she knows that her husband has done PHD in making fake stories still she takes risk of trusting him.
To cellebrate failure or misfortune of ur enemies there should b strong reason. We cant curse any1 just becoz we r nt happy with their existance. If i m nt wrong anandi has never been rude with gauri and neither she had used any abusive word 4 her. Only she knows y she is so much jalouse and insecure? Cursing anandi would nt help her to solve her problem. To solve her complex life she need to control her husband. That would help her a lot.

with the same husband unchanged even a bit,one wife (A) resorted to humiliation at her real insecurity and trying hard to pull herself to become some one in the society of apes,while the other wife (G) resorted to hatred on the exploited victim at her apparent insecurity (as G can lead an independent life unlike A)...none is happy except the hubby...