Originally posted by: mads
Loved the post, Anu..thanks a lot for making it.
Meera might be hazy for you and me, but not for Abhi. He is such a simplistic person, all he can see at this moment is, the girl cared for him and his family in so many different ways, somethings that should be unimportant for a mere guest at the pant bhavan home stay:
1. celebrated rohan's bday
2.made sure the pant bhavan homestay property tax deadline was extended
3.Stopped that writer stephanie from leaving pant bhavan homestay
4.keeps on ensuring that Abhi is happy, he is smiling and he is okay. In the forest too, she burnt her clothes and wasted her perfume just to make sure Abhi was okay. No doubt it would look random and stupid to you and me, but for Abhi in that moment, all that mattered is how much the girl cares for him, possibly as much as nobody had cared.
5.Inspired the cousins to think beyond themselves (remember they all wanted to contribute at one point out of their piggy banks during the stephanie haadsa?)
If i watch all the epis then i will definitely find many more such small things that she has done out of her whim and fancies and her ping-pong ish nature, but all of those things nonetheless, seem selfless to Abhi. He doesn't care for her inconsistencies, he adores her despite that, rather, he doesn't even see all of that at the moment. For him, Meera=a girl who spreads laughter happiness by her selfless deeds.
For a guy who loves his family so much, or even someone else too, if they care for you so much, how can you not fall in love with them?
Surely, this might be the beginning of an infatuation or crush or whatever you may call it, but a guy like Abhi who has zero experience in romantic relationships will but obviously categorize his feelings as love- its puppy love or pehla pyaar. He loves her for what she brings to his life, it's as simple as that. For him, it lies somewhere between being smitten by her and falling deeply and irrevocably in love with her, after all, that is how all relationships begin. The depth comes in later as they interact more and more with each other. Whether those inconsistencies in her are a problem in their later part of relationship, who knows? Yes, they might be and probably they will-but that doesn't mean he cannot realize his feelings for her now. You are right, Anu...love is always a work in progress. No matter at what point you realize it, the growth is steady and over the time, especially if it is one that culminates into shaadi. So even if Abhi's love...or infatuation (if you will), is right now at a superficial level, considering the kind of guy he is, it will develop into deeper emotions only eventually.
Right now, he has just scratched the surface when it comes to Meera, when she reciprocates his feelings, that is when the real journey will start. Sure, love as in romantic love is only defined and realized when the other person feels it too, but there are some forms of love that are beyond any such conventional definitions- meera inspires abhi to become a little more selfish and fight for his own happiness than before. Now this show doesnt stress too much on it, but it is glaringly obvious if you read between the lines- also, full credit to PJ for this: his dialogue in friday epi, where he says to yogi uncle "itna toh main maang hi sakta hoon khud ke liye" is such a wonderful 360 from "main bas sabko khush rakhna chahta hoon".. This is what Meera's love and her presence in his life did to him, only he has realized it faster than other guys would, but i find this consistent with his character sketch so far.
Now this was Meera from Abhi point of view.
Apne aap mein toh Meera is no doubt a bunch of contradictions and i get it why people cannot connect with her- it is because if you try to rationalize her actions, it would be impossible to do so, hence she seems so inconsistent and lame. Meera is like modern art- you see something in the picture for a moment, its there and then in a flash, it's gone. The colours are a mismatch with one another, the shapes do not fit in perfectly to give you a feel of a real picture, unlike contemporary art you cannot dissect this one and explain to someone else why you saw what you saw. You just either accept it the way it is or you dont.. Now this might seem to some as a rather sophisticated way to say that a character was badly written, lol..but somehow, be it the narrative or the acting or direction, this modern art appeals to me a lot. I find her endearing, her bunch of contradictions are absolutely fascinating. When she says "main bas khush rehna chahti hoon", she means she WANTS to find happiness or is trying to find happiness in every situation, whatever life throws at her, not that she does that already, it's her longtime wish or dream- to be happy and satisfied in whatever she does, to be around people who tell her it's okay to do so..
.but what separates her from other FLs her type is her deeply seeded insecurities about not being good enough for her family, not living upto their expectations, being a failure in their eyes...all of these far supercede what would have otherwise seemed a confident, happy-go-lucky persona, that would not even think about stepping into such a seemingly lifeless marriage that is doomed to end in unhappiness. Par woh itna duur ki nahin soch rahi hai, Meera is craving for her family's love and respect and right now she thinks the only way to do so is by getting married...look how easily she agreed to get married in the first place.. Who does that?! This is the basic difference between her definition of happiness and with other FLs, who wouldn't compromise for their personal happiness with anything else. For meera, happiness is gaining her parents' love and confidence. Because her parents weren't around to pat her back when she was failing, to tell her that it is okay to be herself and that she doesn't need to uphold the family name. Sure, they accept her, love her, are patient with her, let her be, let her do all those 6-month courses etc...but somewhere keep on hoping ki "woh sudhar jaaye"...what they don't get is that, there is nothing to sudharofy here. And if there is, they are not doing a great job at inspiring that change by forcing her to do something.
The reason she finds a connection with Abhi is because of how he so easily told her that she doesn't have to necessarily be successful in life, be confident and smart and knowledgeable to feel good about herself. When he gave the analogy about failure pahad, he again spoke of exactly that- the pahad is still and does nothing, all it does is that it gives happiness and some much neede peace and quiet to it's visitors..and sometimes, some people need just that-someone who would stand by you, like a solid rock, support you through thick and thin and keep on caring for you no matter what the circumstances are...and Meera, for all her inconsistencies is exactly that. She isn't stable like the rock, but her affections for the people she cares about, are. Her unwavering loyalty, albeit, only to those she considers her apne log- are the only consistent feature in her otherwise weird and "inconsistent" character, look at her from this POV and you will suddenly start to see the alignment of the colours and shapes in this modern art.
Phew! That was a long essay, but a much needed one... Thanks again, for this post. 🤗
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