Chapter 51

"Arjun." She said out loud, her words unsteady due to the way she was quivering with the multiple number of feelings that were running wild inside her. Her pulse rate dropped, the fragile heart of hers not being able to sustain the pressure of it all, as in an instance she was down on her knees, accelerating into losing her unconscious. Arjun and Anita together rushed towards her quickly, with Arjun gathering up her messed up from, and directed by Anita placed her on her bead, Aparna consciously aware of Arjun's presence around her.

Anita hustled around for Aparna's medicines examining the contents of her bag thoroughly until she retrieved the medicines, and giving the correct dozes that she herself being Aparna's doctor had prescribed gave it to her, Arjun holding steadily on to Aparna's hand, his entire face painted with colors of intense worry. Digesting the medicines, it slowly showed it effects all this while Anita and Aparna on her heels, seeing those signs of recovery coming on her face.

"Arjun." She said after sometime, collecting all her strength, tears still making their way down her cheeks, as Arjun kept his finger on her lips silencing her down.

"Sshhh." He pressed his finger assuringly on her lips, with her staring in his eyes, and then looked away, her hand extending towards his hand, however as he followed her line of sight, before she could get hold of his hand, he had removed his hand away, that hard, cold look returning to his eyes, as she looked up into them searchingly, trying to find an explanation for his action, but that terrifying pain in his eyes, broke her, the signs of defeat appearing in her eyes. Aparna slumped back in her bed, her entire body going numb, Arjun removing his finger from her lips, his eyes stinging with tears that hadn't been unleashed in nineteen years. He had heard people saying that the military made people heartless, but he knew better, it was her decision that had made him heartless, she had made her life decision against him, he was not ready to forget that in one moment of weakness.

Anita stood there on the corner of the room, seeing her husband moving out, and Aparna staring in despair at his moving form, uncontrollable tears flowing out of her eyes. Her legs shaking with what she thought would be a fairly easy thing, seemed to have gone way beyond her reach, she walked towards where Aparna was lieing, sitting by her side, Aparna, turning her head to look at Anita miserably.

"It's not his fault. I deserve this. I deserve this because I trampled upon his care myself. I took his pleas for my safety as jealousy for my happiness, I took his truthful words not as the truth, but as a bitter horrendous lie. It's my fault. I am to blame." Aparna said in a shattered voice, her eyes shedding tears, for the things that she had lost, the people she had given up, for that one person who, who had given up on her for everyone else.

"Aparna. He just needs time. It's not easy for him to see you, to see you like this, after all these years. You know that he still cares. I know you could tell it just by looking at him once. He cares, but he needs time." Anita told her assuring her of Aryan's come back by squeezing Aparna's hand tightly, seemingly as broken as Aparna and Arjun were. It was not easy. It wasn't easy for any of them.

Outside Arjun, stood in front of the pictures of Khushi and Aparna hanging in front, his back resting against a strong concrete pillar, eyes boring into the cheerful yet distantly sad faces of Khushi and Aparna. He closed his eyes slowly, letting the previous events seep into his mind, sending shock tremors down his spine.

"Ani..ta..this is.." Arjun began, his voice extremely cold. But before he could even get the chance to complete his sentence, the white washed door before him flung open and in front of him stood her, the women, the female that made his life mater all the more, her, Aparna Malhontra. His senses seemed to have gone numb seeing her standing there, as her eyes mirrored the same shock that he had absorbed himself into, taking two steps back at a time, her entire body shuddering with the effect of what stood on her front door.

Aparna could feel her breathe constricting, and heart almost stop breathing, when her eyes wandered around him, the same meery blue eyes, perfectly chiseled face, now a lot more mature then she had last seen, flexes that showed that he was in the military, however that feeling of fondness about his bold persona could not be neglected in any case.

He opened his eyes again, sight still trained in the pictures, for the first time his eyes resting on a small framed picture on the far side, of Aryan, Aparna and Khushi. His jaw tightened, as he looked into that picture, that genuine happiness reflecting in the eyes of Khushi and Aparna. He tore his eyes away from that picture and looked at the other pictures of Khushi and Aparna only together, that hollowness in their smile haunting him now. He hated to believe it, but that was the truth, that man, that man was their world. That man completed their world. His tongue shivered, and body trembled with fury, that heartbreaking thought entering his head; and yet he, Aryan had left them.

"Your best friend had a stroke." Anita Raizada said, keeping her voice inhumanly low, as if breaking out drastic news, which in fact it was, the buzz on the other side of the line, making it evident to her of her husbands very expected reaction.

"What! Apar'how could she' (his voice trailing away bitterly) no wait..which best friend are you talking about? I don't have any best friends" he retorted subtly, his head now covered with beads of sweat, mind churning back to produce the image of her, the image of the person he so missed, hadn't it been for that day, probably they would still be best friends.

"Arjun please, stop playing me, stop playing yourself. You know it's her. She has been your only best friend, 25 years did not fade away the effect of that friendship, it's still there Arjun nothing has changed" Anita Raizada replied in a serious, yet a closely offended voice, the labored breathe of her husband reaching her ears through the phone, making it clear of the way he would be acting right now.

"Everything has changed Anita, nothing is the same. She chose him over me, over our 19 year old friendship, she is the one who drove me away from her self, there was nothing that I can do about it"

"She's paying for it now Arjun. She's paying for every wrong decision that she made." Mrs.Raizada told him, her voice cracking a bit now, as tears flowed down her eyes, recollecting all those cherish memories of the perfect foursome that they were.

"What do you mean? Is she fine? Where is Aryan?" he asked her suddenly, the tension within him growing, all kinds of horrible thought invading his mind, yet he tried to calm his nerves hoping for the best.

"She had a major stroke, I just got over with her operation a few minutes ago." She replied him back slowly, the pain searing through her, hearing her husbands raspy breathe on the phone, his voice that she guessed hanging some where unknown in his voice box.

"And Aryan? Where is he?" he said with certain bitterness in his voice, the sour touch to it completely knocking Anita off guard, but then she knew she kind of expected this reaction, obviously because the 20 year old hate had only gone graver and stronger with time.

"He left her."

Anita's words ringed in his mind, and it was a surprise to himself, how he hadn't manage to crumple on the ground, but then it struck him, he couldn't crumple, because he had lost the ability to do so, he was no more a weak boy, no more a teenager who had no words to explain his pain, he was no more any of that, he was now a grown up man, a man with a family, a man who was serving the military, he was a soldier, a conqueror now.

"Arjun. Please. Please. Hold yourself, she'll realize, she'll come back." Anita said in a desperate voice, digging her fingers deep into her 20 year old boy friends shoulder, who had been sitting extremely silent since the last two days, not eating anything, not doing anything, just sitting by a pillar, staring into blank space observing the rise of the sun and its fall day and night. His parents had lost the patience to handle him anymore; he was no more than a living mannequin now, who was devoid of any kind of human activity.

Arjun sat their motionless, observing the shiny moon and its surrounding stars, uttering nothing for the past few days, his blood circulation fixed in one direction due to the lack of movement. Anita moved in closer to him helplessly, keeping her head on his shoulder yet receiving no response whatsoever. She had seen how he had shivered when in the house next doors the blast of music of her marriage would surface in his house, she had seen how his eyes kept searching for her from the balcony in hope that she would look up and notice him there, but even though he knew she had noticed him she wouldn't look up and that had left him shattered, like his soul had been ripped out of him.

"She wont come back na? Ever again." He spoke finally after what was 2 days of complete silence, making Anita for a split second tremble with surprise, and then she lifted her head off his shoulders looking at him still staring at the sky, but now she could see that his pupil had gone watery, and that expressionless look was also fading away.

"She wont come back na?" he repeated himself again, this time his voice shaking dangerously with sorrow, his entire features pulled inside, making him appear like a sick patient.

"She will Arjun. She will. She has to. She can't live without you." Anita told him regaining the strength to work on some ground now that he had spoken, her efforts of pulling him out of this trauma now seeming more promising.

"And if she learns to? If she learns to live without me? Then? Then she won't come back?" Arjun turned his face towards Anita, his voice entirely broken, eyes searching for some hope, just one flicker of hope that assured him that his best friend would be back, but the more he looked into Anita's eyes, the more he knew that they had gotten to the point of no return. Aparna was not coming back.

"She's not coming back. (Set of tears falling down his eyes) She's not coming back. She's not coming back." He repeated the phrase over and over again, his entire body crumpling with the force, that deep pain inside his heart finally finding its way out, as his entire form lost any stability, his head lurching towards the ground, just in time for Anita to hold him by his shoulders, to steady him up, that heart broken expression on his face, shattering her from within.

"She told me. My Appy. My Appy. She told me she would never leave me. No matter what happens. My Appy (shaking Anita) She told me she would never leave. Then why? Why? Why, did she leave now? She promised me she wouldn't do it danmmit!" he said angrily now, letting go of Anita and slamming his fist into the tiled ground, that force he applied giving the same reaction to him, hurting his fist bones.

"Arjun. Arjun. (Anita takes control over his out of control form) Arjun. Listen to me. You have to move on. That's what she wanted. That what she would want. It was her life decision and she made it, but where does it say that her life decision means the End for you? Where? (Her palms on his cheeks) Its not the end, and I am sure she will come, despite everything, one day it will all be good. You might not be ready for it then, you might want to hold back, but you wont be able to, because she's your best friend, and irreplaceable too. (Arjun looks down, but she forces him to look at her) Look at me Arjun. I am here for you. You love me don't you? (Arjun nods slowly) Then? You can wait for her to come back with me. We love each other, our lives cant stop just because she has chosen to walk away. You have to understand Arjun, this is not the end." Anita said, out of breathe after her earth shattering words, as the hollowness from Arjun's eyes seemed to distance itself from him, and he looked like he had found a reason to live again. It was not the same like before, but then it was time he accepted that it would never be the same again.

"Arjun. You are mine. Are you listening to me? You are mine. I want to be yours too. Can I be it? Will you do justice to my feelings?" Anita asked him in a final attempt, to absorb all his pain and fatigue him to herself, as she crept in closer pulling him into a close, comfortable hug, him too numb to respond anything for a few seconds, until he hugged back with all his might, some lone tears making their way down his cheeks, his voice entirely cracked.

"Yes. I will. Yes, I will do justice to your feelings."

His senses went numb, every time he thought of those difficult times, when he had found it so hard to cope up with life without Aparna, but Anita she had been like a pillar by his side, when no one was there, that is why she was his wife, and Aparna was his best friend, yet that did not blur their individual importance in front of him.

"Arjun." Anita stood behind him, her hand on his shoulder, his eyes moving away from the wall of pictures and towards her, a complaining and hurt expression on his face.

"You shouldn't have done this Ani. You should have told me that we were coming here." Arjun said in a stable, yet filled with grief and complain voice, making Anita's feature turn very sober.

"You woudnt have come to meet her, if I told you."

"I would have. I was mentally prepared before I came to Stanford that in time I would have to face Aparna. But I needed some time to digest the fact that she was here in the same vicinity as me. That we were both living in the same area after what is 20 years." Arjun explained his point of view, Anita looking down in guilt her legs shivering in pain in front of her husband.

"I am sorry Arjun." She said in an apologetic tone, her eyes filled with tears to the brim but she was trying her best to not break apart right now. She knew her responsibilities as a wife were being tested right now.

Arjun lifted her chin upwards so that she was looking at him, and moving closer engulfed her in a tight hug, her face getting buried in her chest, their eyes closed.

"Don't be. I guess it's time some things do get figured out." He told her in a grave tone, and she opened her eyes, her face looking up at the certainty in his eyes, questioning that with her eyes, but his firm nod, told her that he was ready for it.

*************************************************

"Who is he?" he asked her in a curious yet, freezed tone, and in that individual moment being responsible, Khushi found herself face to face into accepting the biggest truth of her life.

"Who is he?" She half mumbled to herself, the other half to him drawing a perplexed, angry expression on his face.

"What? Gupta are in your senses?" he said under gritted teeth, trying his best to be patient, which with every passing second was starting to wither away. Khushi knew him just too well, to know that what was going inside his head but right now, she had only passed the bridge to not be in a state of denial herself, confessing it to him, was a hurdle she was not ready to pass just now. Before she could say anything as a response, the most cheerful voice ever reached her ears, and internally she rejoiced in happiness. Danm. She loved him so much for this, for everything.

"Chun!" Vivek shouted from a far distance, speeding towards her, much to Arnav's greatest annoyment, who was just not ready to let go of her, and held her in position, directing her attention towards himself, but she knew now that Vivek was here, there was little to worry about, he would get her out of this dreadful fix.

"Chun, I need to talk about something very important." Vivek told her masking a tone of urgency, as Khushi nodded, trying to get herself free from Arnav's grip but much to her surprise he wasn't letting go, instead his grip just got the whole more tighter.

"So do I. We are in the middle of it. Your talk can wait." Arnav told him in a throaty voice, making Khushi let her pupils bulge out with surprise. Middle of it? But she was pretty sure that they hadn't even started as yet. While she seemed a lot more affected, Vivek stood their unflinchingly, staring right into Arnav's eyes without moving.

"In that case, your talk can wait." He told Arnav with a hint of finality in his voice, and in one swift move seeking the chance where Arnav had loosened his grip on Khushi, dragged her away, but this was Arnav Singh Raizada he was dealing with, when he held on to something, he wasn't going to let go of it that easily.

"It most certainly cannot." Arnav said coldly, his eyes boring into the two best friends icily, as Vivek retraced his moves backwards, and with one steady firm grip removed Arnav's hand from Khushi's wrist, and without any further notice, picked up Khushi in his arms, and trotted off away with her in the fairly isolated part of the jungle. Khushi and Arnav both were too stupefied to say anything, with Khushi looking right back at a heavily pissed Arnav, and then at the un-denying firmness with which Khushi was carrying her, startled was a word under estimating her feelings.

Arnav stared blankly, at the disappearing pair of them, his entire body slithering in extreme fury, as digging his feet in the muddy ground he went back to where the other students were, blood drowning his vision, and an unknown feeling of jealousy striking him. He was too stunned to believe, that someone with an easy going nature like Vivek would ever show case such power, but then when he thought of it he had little doubt, Vivek had done it before, rarely enough but he had done it before.

Vivek's eyes were boring into his figure like an angry ravished beast, as Arnav straightened his clothes and gave a hard look to Vivek, jolted right out of his wits seeing the furious composure of Vivek. Before Arnav could even say something, words had been thrown right at his face.

"Get out of the car!"

With the calmness of the lake on their left, and distant sound of their fellow mates enjoying themselves, Vivek came to a sudden halt and kept Khushi down, his eyes narrowed at her in an inquisitive manner.

"You didn't have to be like 'bitch please' to him Vivek. I would be shivering in the lake, hadn't it been for him." She said in a disapproving manner, causing Vivek to narrow his eyes all the more at her, and then shaking his head, he sat down on the muddy ground, looking ahead of him at the midnight blue lake.

"I feel like slapping you hard on your face right now, you know that? (Khushi looks at him with an awkward expression and sits down herself next to him) you have been way too lost." Vivek continued shortly, after taking a long pause, and said nothing after that leaving Khushi all the more in confusion.

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing that you don't understand. (looking straight at her) do you even realize what could have happened had he not been there? Just like you said, you'd be shivering in the lake, or most probably die too. Disappear. And none of us would know. The dark would take it all away and none of us would know." He related, in a sober mood, softly, losing his words time to time but managed to get his message across. That sight of her losing her footing, hanging by just a thread on that rock, sent shivers down his spine, as if a part of him was going to get lost. Yes, he feared losing her, more than anything, because she was close, because in his mind she was his everything. Khushi silenced, hearing his frightened words, and moved in closer to him, until their arms were rubbing against each other, him still looking miserably at the lake.

"It was just an accident Vivek. And see, (holding his chin, and turned his face towards herself) see, I am fine. I am perfectly alright." Khushi said a merry reassurance in her voice, but Vivek was still too deeply affected by what had happened, and that fear it wasn't going to let go of him that easily.

"And what if it would have been that moment? What if it had been the moment you die? What would happen then? I would never be able to hear, this I am perfectly alright ever again." He said in a choky voice, his voice trailing away, as he struggled to fight the tears that could possibly make their way down his cheeks. Stifling them, a loud throaty choke evoked from within him, causing Khushi to get immediately alert, and she cupped his face in her hands seeing his drowny features unable to maintain eye contact with him.

"Vivek? Vivek? You are an optimist. You have always been one, what happened today? Why do you want to think of the possibility that I could have died? (seeing a lone tear roll down his face) Vi..vek? Are you crying?" she said, worriedly, her own voice on the verge of breaking, him looking down somewhere, but not into her eyes, which were scrutinizing every part of his face, and that ghostly look on it.

"I don't want to think about it. But I cant really help it. (looking up at her) Chun, I cant afford to lose you. I have already lost enough. You are the only person, who knows me, who understands me, like the way people expect their parents to do. But you cant really be delusioned by that thought, when you know your parents are dead." He told her in a faded kind of voice, making the hair in her body stand erect, and she struggled for control over the drastic emotions that were going to overcome her thinking, digging her frosty hands more into Vivek's cheek bones.

"What rubbish are you talking? You are making me scared now."

"I hid it from you. Because I thought it wasn't right of you to know. You kept your barriers to me in the beginning, I have been keeping mine too. But its time I let go of them, their edges just pierce me more, when I think I am not being completely honest to you. Mr and Mrs Mandvi, are my foster parents. My mother died, when I was one. My father lived the life of a drunkard and died too. I was put up for adoption then, and that's how I landed with the Mandvi's. (Khushi's eyes are going moist, but she forces the tears away) But I have no complains from life. Mom, Dad love me a lot, but understanding me is way beyond their grasp. They have never made me feel like I am their foster child. Probably if my real parents would have been alive, I would never have met them, never be in Stanford in the first place, never have met you. That would be a life I would regret. This I don't regret, I obviously have nothing to regret about. I am living the life of a perfect teenager. (his eyes now locked with hers) Yet, nothing of this would be as perfect as it sounds if you wouldn't be here. I had lots of complains from life, before you came, but knowing you, knowing your life, I feel privileged to not have been through, what you have seen. I admire you Khushi. I admire your courage. And I want to learn more, keep you with me forever, because you are that special to me. That special." Vivek ended in a slightly choky voice, but he had gained good control of his emotions now, and was waiting for Khushi to respond, but she remained silent, and instead of talking, picked up his hands that were on his thigh and enclosed them within hers.

"I won't be leaving this soon. I won't leave, until we have completed our forever. Together. (Putting up a naughty, cheerful smile) Now, stop being a douchebag will you? It makes you look like a whiny wuss. (Vivek smiles) You know what? I am glad you came there, I so was in a terrible fix. I was most certainly a gonner if you wouldn't have come. Oh well, I guess, not just a gonner a real gonner. (Vivek gives her a smirk) I realized something Vivek. Something really special." She told him, now her sight stretching wide at the isolated place, and the only lively sounds of mother nature surrounding them, making the entire scenery look more peaceful and enlightening.

"You love him don't you? You love Arnav." He concluded, smiling at her joyfully, her looking at him in intense shock, then nodding her head fiercely a look of ecstasy on her face.

"Don't be so shocked. I heard you shouting on the rock like an idiot (Khushi gives him a punch on his shoulder), besides you have been acting dream eyed, and googly faced since morning, I knew you would get this as an answer at the end of the day." Vivek explained her and she gifted him with a small smile, spraying away some sand next to her aimlessly somewhere else. A comfortable silence engulfed the two of them, which was finally broken when Khushi began to rub her eyes vigorously.

"Chun, you could do with a goodnights rest. C'mon we should be going back to the tents. *pause* (seeing the jagged marks under her feet, and the brutal cut on her limb.) Vishaka gave me this. (he gives her a small bottle of ointment) She was too shy to even look at you after that kissing episode (Khushi grins mischievously) This is for your wounds. Apply this before going to sleep, by morning you'll hopefully be a lot better." He told her, and keeping it securely in the pockets of her shorts, they both got up, walking back to the tent, Arnav and Karan nowhere in sight, off to the tent probably, while even Vishaka and her group of friends, seemed to have gone, leaving behind only a handful of students still sitting around the bonfire. Bidding each other good night, Khushi and Vivek went off to their own tents, along with the handful of students left, following them to their own tents one after the other.

Vivek opened the flap of the tent stepping inside, only to be greeted by a very hostile Arnav, a strike of understanding on Karan's face, and already asleep Mayank. He had barely made it to his bed, when Arnav held his hand back, and forced him to join eyes with him, his teeth clenched, and jaw looking iron manufactured.

"What did you do that for? All that power demonstration in front of Gupta?" Arnav questioned him rudely, his stare penetrating deep within Vivek, to provoke fear, but nothing of that sort was happening, and Vivek remained alien-ly calm.

"Like I said I had talk to her about something. Yeah I know I could have waited, but I am sure your talk couldn't be more important than mine. Sorry for that." Vivek explained him in a uniform tone and jumped into his bed without saying another word, leaving Arnav too shocked for words yet again.

"Whatever got into him?" he asked Karan, who bounced his shoulders up and down, shaking his head, and himself collapsed into his bed, dozing off to sleep, after saying a hazy good night to Arnav. Arnav looked around himself, batting his eyes thinking off how everybody had been acting weird since morning. Khushi staring at him all dreamy eyed, Vivek emerging out to be a X-Men or something, and Karan acting like he knew something that Arnav didn't. Shaking his head violently just one time, he closed his eyes tight, and went to bed, blocking out the thoughts of everybody for a peaceful sleep.

****************************************************