Chapter 33

 

"Why I feel I am loosing this battle" he rubbed his hair and turned

"and why do my heart and each cell in my body want to loose this battle. Why I feel I will not be able to fight anymore" he got up, went to washroom and splashed water on his face.

"Why I don't want to fight anymore"

He then heard a knock on the door. Thinking it to be his mother he opened the door.

But there stood the one from whom he had run away. Geet was standing in front of him, with flood of emotions sparkling in her eyes.

She just pushed him in to the wall behind the door, keeping her restless head on his chest. Maan who himself was in such vulnerable condition, did not realize what happened so soon.

His heart was beating fast, Geet could feel and hear it; hers was beating at its own unknown speed.

"Geet leave" he uttered, unknown if he really wanted it.

"No, I won't leave, why should I" this made him more determined to say "leave I say"

Geet was now loosing, she cannot bear this separation and she knew by the dance today how he too was holding himself very badly. Her heart was completely restless and so was his. Tired of his denial

"Nahi jaoonge, kahin nahi jaoongee" with this she slided down, her hand running down the center of his shirt, breaking all his buttons as she slid down and she landed sitting near his leg, holding his leg tight, tears flowing down her eyes.

Maan just kept looking at her helpless, broken and vulnerable condition. He felt completely weak seeing this condition of her, his resolution which was already on verge of being broken felt like shattering down'

"Geet uttho" but Geet shook her head still holding on his leg and then he felt her tear drop on his bare feet.

Maan closed his eyes with the feel of her tear drops, not able to hold it anymore he sat down. Man closed his eyes to calm down his nerves which were behaving erratically.

"why are you doing all this Geet, how much will you test me"

Geet on this looked fiercly into his eyes, she held his collar and pulled him towards her

"How much will you test me? I can't bear this separation from you. In which way you want me to tell you, you only tell."

Geet was now in no sense; she only knew she could not stay separate from him anymore.

Maan was just looking at her, blank; trying to figure out what was right and what was wrong, while his mind was just numb.

"How do I make you trust me. Test me whatever way you want but I can't bear this sepeartion anymore, it's killing me everyday. I better die"

"Geet!!!" he roared

"I can see your pain and it kills me, its biggest punishment for me to see you like this in pain but if you think any other punishment, give me but I can no more bear this sepeartion and witness you pain in front of my eyes everyday."

She placed her head on his bare chest and her tears flowed down freely from top to bottom of his bare front, jolting him in thousand of ways.

 "who am I to punish you when I have no right on you. I am just keeping my self safe"

Geet again held his shirt and pulled him towards her "why don't you understand, you are not keeping yourself safe, you are killing yourself everyday and in process killing me too. "

Maan kept quiet, he wanted and needed someone to clear the cloud that has gathered his life, which was not letting hm see anything clearly.

 

"Ok, I don't love you but you love me, that's what you claimed right? What kind of love this is that to keep youself safe you are pushing me, your love in pain' sab jhuta, aapka pyar jhuta "

 

"Geet!!!" Maan roared her again. Geet looked into his eyes and he could see only love for him in her pleading eyes. She cupped his face in her palm

 

"Maan I love you" Maan kept looking at her, trying to read her eyes in many ways to prove himself right but all it showed was opposite, her eyes were only proving him wrong, it in all ways only showed true love for him.

 

Mentally giving up he asked "when did it happen and how."

 

Geet looked up at him, his one sentence and his look on her gave her so much confidence. He was ready to listen to her, she knew then he was somewhere giving up this fight. She has to be very genuine in explaining him everything.

 

There was one thin string holding him, restricting him, preventing him from complete trust. His heart wanted that string to break. He wanted to trust her but she have to make him trust her or else he will not be able to leave that string of mistrust.

 

Geet smiled and hugged him, Maan just stayed still, nor hugged her back nor removed her.

 

"I will tell you everything" she settled down and placed her head and one hand on his bare chest. It felt soothing to Maan but he tried to stop himself to fel anything so he again stayed still.

 

"You know, I had always been a very practicle and business oriented person. I always believed that I was so strong mentally that it was impossible for any man to make me fall in love with them and thus when anyone would talk of love and such things, I though and claimed them to be a fool."

 

"Then one day, dad showed me your picture my eyes just got stuck there, I was completely blown away. Your look, your smile and style with which you were standing.You know I had never felt of any person like that, the way I felt for you n that picture"

 

"Then Dad's word came and I was brought back in reality. I slapped myself in mind for thinking like a fool. How could I accepted and my ego came in between. I said dad if he is interested, I am fine but then coming back to my old self I did not show much interest.

 

Within my heart, somewhere I had decided that you will be the one."

 

"But I was I Geet handa, I could not bear anyone making me fall of him and thus when Dad asked me to meet you I completely avoided. Somewhere I was fearing, I will loose my hert completely to you and then I trusted Dad, I knew he will get the best one for me. Not making anyone obvious, not even myself I got myself even busier in projects and work. Did not even tried to find anything about you coz I was Geet Handa, and any man has to work hard to get my attention.But you never came to meet me, I then imagined you to be a similar person like me, full of attitude and I was loving that."

 

"We were getting married and I saw you in Sherwani dad had gifted you. That day, first time, Geet Handa had goosebumps. I felt myself blushing.I never knew things could ever feel sacred, but the way you placed Mangalsutra and vermilion on me and that soothing smile of your when our eyes had met, I felt I was loosing everything but then I was a strong girl and Geet Handa cannot be such blushy blushy' I recovered my self back to a practicle Geet"