Social Realism in ChanChan - Page 2

Originally posted by: Oyster

That's really sad Harshu. And I loved you your referred to it as "upper-class prostitution"

I certainly agree that as a female, ChanChan is a much more well developed character than Khushi. I just mentioned in another post that ChanChan would have reacted very differently if she were slapped by her mother and taunted by everyone else for secretly marrying Arnav...

This might be personal Harshu so you are free to refuse replying.. But if you don't mind me asking.. would you refuse to marry a guy whom you thought was perfect if he asked for dowry? I mean everything else is perfect but the only thing is that his family asks for dowry...

Originally posted by: Senorita Sanaya

How is he good if he is asking for Dowry ? That reflects his upbringing too. The other day I was reminding my dad that under no circumstances will my bro take dowry or will we give. Or I shall create a scene. I stick to my words I can do it 😆 but I am sure that will not happen. I have not studied for just those marks & certificates I have studied to improvise my thought process & I would obviously expect the other party to do the same. When my relatives did that for my cousin I was wondering why study dammit ? Just for proof to get through the interviews ? Implementing what you study is called progressing - not passing those exams - this is one reason where India's study system needs to really improve.

I have a whole list of conditions when I get married & I have seen it that I also have those qualities in me before wanting it from else where it in due time.

I have strong opinions about such issues - this is off topic Sonya even Sati for that matter (I hope you know what I am talking about & we can always discuss via PM's)

PS - I typed this reply twice because I loved your post & because the net ate it darn.

Originally posted by: Jayne

Good!

If you don't mind sharing a few of those conditions... ?

I am curious to know if other people think similarly.

Jayne

Originally posted by: jaya100

Lovely post and I hope that it will be handled in a way that makes people think rather than a lecture we all have heard in dramas before. The custom of dowry I believe began as StriDhan which I guess was a way to give a daughter her share in her fathers property when she left his home and also it was only meant for the use of the girl and not even her husband had any rights on that share...in a way it gave the girl financial independance from her husband. That is the way it was explained to me but if that's incorrect then please let me know. Unfortunately human nature and greed can turn even the best thinking into something so base as the current dowry system. The people who are educated and still parricipate are the ones that sicken me. Don't the boys family think of this as selling their son to the highest bidder or the girls family realise that they too have educated their daughter and she will spend the rest of her life supporting that family at every level from financial to emotional. Is a daughter such a burdent that you need to pay someone to take her off your hands or in the hope that that will ensure a happy life for her.Personally I haven't come across a demand for dowry apart from the underhanded 'we don't want anything but you can give your daughter whatever you want'.In my marriage a family member of mine suggested my Dad should give a substantial sum of cash to my husbands family even though they hadn't asked for anything at all...my father just turned around and said whatever I have belongs to my children and when the time comes will be theirs only but that time is not now.

Originally posted by: Jayne

Why?

Why only that family?
What about her family?
She owes them more first...duty-wise... love-wise.

So, discharge the first responsibility ahead of anybody else... or to be fair do equally for both and make sure your partner does his/her equal share.
(equal = equitable)

Jayne

Originally posted by: jaya100

Lovely post and I hope that it will be handled in a way that makes people think rather than a lecture we all have heard in dramas before. The custom of dowry I believe began as StriDhan which I guess was a way to give a daughter her share in her fathers property when she left his home and also it was only meant for the use of the girl and not even her husband had any rights on that share...in a way it gave the girl financial independance from her husband. That is the way it was explained to me but if that's incorrect then please let me know. Unfortunately human nature and greed can turn even the best thinking into something so base as the current dowry system. The people who are educated and still parricipate are the ones that sicken me. Don't the boys family think of this as selling their son to the highest bidder or the girls family realise that they too have educated their daughter and she will spend the rest of her life supporting that family at every level from financial to emotional. Is a daughter such a burdent that you need to pay someone to take her off your hands or in the hope that that will ensure a happy life for her.Personally I haven't come across a demand for dowry apart from the underhanded 'we don't want anything but you can give your daughter whatever you want'.In my marriage a family member of mine suggested my Dad should give a substantial sum of cash to my husbands family even though they hadn't asked for anything at all...my father just turned around and said whatever I have belongs to my children and when the time comes will be theirs only but that time is not now.