Chapter 61- Fire Exit
Rey's POV
Rey opened the fire exit door and sighed. He was regretting it. He should have known. He should have known that Shivam was doing this for⊠He sighed again and sat there, his face in his hands. Suddenly, he was very unsure of his future. For the first time, he didn't know what was to be expected from tomorrow. The door opened again. He didn't have to look back to see that its her.
Taani's POV
She saw him. She knew how he was feeling. She felt his pain. She had always been great to understand people's body language. She knew he was regretting his decision now. He stood up. She wanted to scold him, but there was no use. The damage was done and she knew that he needed all the support he can get right now. She tried to relax and calm herself. She had to be strong now. He needs me.
Rey finally broke the silence.
Rey: (said so softly, all pain visible) I am sorry Taani. I know I shouldn't haveâŠ
Taani didn't need to hear it all. She didn't need any words from him. She knew he was beating himself. She knew she had to be strong right now, but it was very difficult. She could barely control herself. It was like a mental snap. She was very strong, but being the beloved had made her depend on others. Guess she didn't realize until then how much she was depended on him. He was a relief to her. Their professional relationship of GS and AGS, she had been taking it for granted.
Rey: (He felt like he needed to justify himself. He could not face the accusations right now) He was talking ill about you and I just couldn't control myself. I just snapped. I am sorry. (meeting her eyes, trying to tell her how much he regretted the outburst.)
They met each other's eyes. What words could not explain, their eyes said it all. Taani felt his pain. She knew he was sorry, but she was very furious. Not at him but at herself. Rey was the most important person in her life. She believed that he deserved all the happiness in the world and she was always the reason for trouble. What was wrong with her? The persons who she loved more than her own life, for whom she could do anything, why did they have to face problems because of her. She hated it. She hated being a weak link. Shivam's actions said it all. Girls have a certain gift. Boys' body language says more about what they are thinking than their words. She knew that Shivam was noticing her and Rey's involvement. It was not hard to put two and two together that he figured that Rey would snap if he abused her. The anger killed her. She wanted to kill him, but more she was very angry at herself. She hated that love which weakens people. She believed that love was very strong feeling. Log kehte hai, ki 'we fall in love.' She never liked it. Why to love, if people only fall in love? Why not rise in love? Her first relationship had matured her. The one thing she hated about Sagar and her relationship was that he broke her so easily. She remembered, before being in love, how strong she was. She was so strong. Not a tomboy, but her values in life were different. She believed in only one rule: "NO RULES." She had never followed any rules in her life even when she had been staying in a joint family. Her mom, naani, aunts etc always told her, girls do this and that. Don't do this and that. Tum ladki ho, tumhe ese hi behave karna chahiye etc etc. And she hated it. She hated if someone told her to do something, because she is a girl. So what if she was a girl. It sounded so lame to her that she had to follow restrictions just because she was a girl. She was not a tomboy, she felt all the things a girl feels, but when it came to caliber, talents, deeds, she hated that people underestimated her just because she is a girl. Like people believed that only boys had talent. That only boys could do things out of the way. Her family was very open. There were restrictions, but also freedom of thinking. The elder persons like her naani, they day by day scold her for her behavior, but she didn't care. She always did what she believed to be right. She matched up with everyone, boys and girls, but the girly tactics of girls, gossiping, giggling, chit chatting about someone behind their back, she hated it. That's why she matched up more with the boys. She had so many boys as friends. Someone who understood her. When Taani was younger, she had a dream. She wanted to do something for her country. To remove the bad things which happened, because she couldn't take it if someone did something wrong, if something was happening wrong. People watch news and gossip about it, telling how the government is doomed etc, she hated those talks. She believed in taking actions. Why do we sit still, if we have a power to do something good? Why can't we use our energy in making the world a better place instead of gossiping?
She had decided, she would be a crime Journalist then. Because she was not to be a gossip girl, a girl who does nothing but point out mistakes in others. No. She wanted to do something in world, to influence others point of view. ButâŠ. Something happened, which gave strength to her dream and also shattered her dream. She decided not to think about it. It didn't help to think about it now. That way was blocked and chah kar bhi wo use khol nahi sakti thi.These all thoughts were going through her mind when these all things happened. Mind has different layers of course. While she was thinking about a way to stop this from happening she thought about all this. Her life had shattered because of love. Love is the most beautiful feeling. She had heard about this from childhood. She was a bookwarm always. She loved reading books whatever it maybe. She had heard about love all the time, but never experienced the feeling of having the effect that hard on herself before Sagar. It was bliss when they were together, but then he broke her in an instant. This feeling, she hated. Jo ladki, kitani bhi buri situation me se bahar nikalne ki shakti rakhti he, wo ladki sirf 'love' ki vajah se tut gayi. This she hated. That's why she was so resilient to admit her feelings for Rey. Because she hated love. She hated that because of love, she became weak. That because of love, she had gained pain and a weak spot. 'She' could handle it. But seeing Rey in this situation, she hated it. She knew that Shivam used her to get back at Rey and bhai. This she hated. She hated being the cause of wrong in Rey's and her bhai's life. She hated being a weak spot. Love is the most powerful emotion of all time. Being in a relationship is the most beautiful time of a life. Love should give gain, not pain. It angered her that because of her, that Shivam give problem to Rey. All these she felt while looking at Rey in the fire exit. She wanted to heal him, to get everything back to normal. But how? How to do it?
She hesitated. She could easily see his pain. She took a deep breath. But she had no idea what to do to make him feel better. She knew that he, just like her hated sympathy, hated the words without feelings, pretendence. He was the most truthful person she had ever seen. He never lied about his feelings, but he learned to cop up with his feelings.
She admired him. Respected him. In some divisions, he was her idol. Like his ability and his strength. She had no idea about his relationship with Kriya, but she had seen his pain and known about Rey's feelings from Sharon. But still after that he was daring enough to feel again. To love again. She admired him for that. He was the true leader. She tried again to calm herself. They both tried to relax. Rey tried to get control of his emotions and Taani too.They both
had been silent for so long. This situation had them all in a bad position.
Taani looked at him. He was in an emotional stat now, but not giving up. She liked it. He was too proud to give up on a situation. She knew that if she said that it is okay, then this would just irritate him more, because they both knew that it was not okay. He knew he was at fault, but he would never let the guilt over ride him. He was stronger than that. Taani took a deep breath, taking control of her fears and emotions. She hesitated, but took his hand and interwined their fingers together, sitting simply with him. Not for comfort, not for sympathy, she just let him know that she was with him, that whatever happened, whatever situation arised, they both would take care of it together.
He seemed to know it. He looked at her with a determined and respecting expression.
Rey knew in that moment that Taani was the best buddy he can get. Their relationship will not break them, it would rise them, it would strengthen him. That she would not let him fall, or she was not 'his prerana in his life' She was not the girl to sit back and enjoy all the action. She was too stubborn to be that. She liked to be involved in action. She liked to cause a difference in world. He relaxed. He liked it, that she let him take care of his own problems. Taani was always like that. So stubborn. She hated if someone controlled her problems and same way she let him take care of his problems.
Rey: I know it was my fault.
Taani: (stating) You were provoked.
Rey: (He pursed his lips angrily feeling absolute hatred towards Shivam) (Taani observed him) (Suddenly, in anger Rey) You know what, I don't regret it. He deserved it.
Taani: (stayed silent)
Rey: (calmed himself)
Taani: So, now what are we gonna do?
Rey: (He met her eyes) I don't know. For the first time, I don't know what to expect from tomorrow. (He looked at her with a thousand emotions. Anger, love, pain, hatred for that Shivam, longing everything) (He said softly) Taani?
Taani: (met his eyes. She was also feeling the pain.) Hmm? (She replied softly as well)
Rey: I am really sorry. I know you are blaming yourself because Shivam used you to get back at me. But don't do that. (Taani met his eyes surprised. How does he know me so good? Her emotions were so complex, so deep that hardly ever someone understood them. Rey was one of the few people to understand her. Actually, the third one only to understand her. One of the two persons alive to understand her. She met his eyes. She never said all these things to him. But she never hide it too. He could see this in her eyes. This was one of their silent conversations, which she never liked to give words to. She was comfortable in keeping these emotions to herself only. But it was a relief to know that someone understood her.) (Rey met her eyes all the while. He felt a different kind of pain.) I am not regretting my decision or actions. (He said averting his eyes) The only thing which pains me is ki ab tum meri nahiâŠ. (Stopping himself) I mean, ab tum meri AGS nahi rahi. Ab hamare bich ki jo equation thi, ek GS aur AGS ki wo bhi nahi rahegi. (He met her eyes. For some reason, he was feeling so insecure. Sure their relationship was strong and it was not going to be over just because of this new development, but he wanted her to say something. He wanted to have an assurance from her that his fears were wrong. That this development will not distance them)
Taani: (His statement gave pain. All the feelings rushed back to her.) Its my fault. I am sorry.
Rey: (surprised. He cupped her face in his hands) No, no Taani. How is it your fault? Maybe he used you but you had no idea.
Taani: (desperately. She pressed her hands on his.) I know, but⊠I⊠I don't know what now? Rey? What if that Shivam became GS? I can't handle him. I can't be away from you Rey. (She said all the emotions in her words)
Rey: (he felt calm. He said softly) Taani? I want let that happen. Its not gonna happen. Just trust me.
Taani looked at him with fear in her eyes searching for truth in his eyes. His eyes made her sure of it. She looked at him like he is the most important person in her life and hugged him. Rey didn't expect it. Her force pushed him back a bit, but he balanced himself by pressing his hand on the wall and hugged her back tightly. Both just being with each other, each knowing that they were not alone in this. That they both were together in this battle.
Swayam's POV
Swayam was in the LCD room. Trying to fight his emotions. He knew he was not wrong. How was he supposed to handle all those things that Shivam was talking about Taani. He was very angry at Shivam. He wouldn't say it ever to Taani, but he felt angry at her too. He did, knowing it wasn't her fault. In fact, he couldn't find any fault of hers. But still he was angry.
Sharon came. She saw him. His face told her that he was very angry. Just like when rumors about Taani and Rey had been there. She was very angry at that Shivam too and she was furious at Swayam for stopping her. But she tried to get hold of her situation. This time, she was going to respect his space though. Experience told her that Swayam preferred to stay alone in an over emotional stat. They had work to do though. She walked up to him. She pondered over the fact how to make conversation with him. Swayam was not looking at her. But he spoke after sometime.
Swayam: (Still looking down) I am sorry Sharon. I know I behaved rather impulsively. But (meeting her eyes, with that wise guy look) he was talking rubbish about Taani and I couldn't take it. Believe me, I was not in control of my emotions and I messed up.
Sharon looked at him with a bit surprise and anger fading because of his statement.
Sharon: I know. (She said safely and composed) (Swayam didn't respond. She placed her hand on his and told him) Swayam, I understand how hard it was for you. I know. But right now we don't have time for this. Hume kuch major karna padega aur apne emotion ko control me rakhke hamare aage ke steps decide karne padege.
Swayam: (met her eyes. Still a little angry, but talking with Sharon calmed him) Right.
Sharon averted her eyes. Guess they both knew that they both were in no position to decide further. This incident had shakened them from within.
Sharon: (furiously) I can't believe how much pervert that Shivam is. He used Taani to get back at us. Swayam, we need to do something. We can't let him be the GS. Hume Shivam apna naam elections ke liye de isase pehle hi kisi promising student ke naam dene honge, sothat Shivam doesn't become a GS.
Swayam: (still disturbed but controlling) Right. To, the captains of various fields?
Sharon: (nodded) I called them here. I hope one of them gives their name. Rey se achha GS ki position ke liye hume nahi milega, par if we support someone then Shivam ki elections jitane ki probability kam hogi.
Swayam: Right, authorities use support kar rahi he. Both VP and AVP. So, hume apni side aur strong banani padegi. There they are. (All three captains come. 2 boys and a girl)
Sharon: Oh, hi guys. Thanks for coming itani short notice par.
Swayam: Haan guys actually tum sab ko isliye bulaya he kyunki as you all know elections vapis hone wale he and aap log apne apne fields me achievers he. Rob you are the sports captain
Sharon: Smita Dramatics leader
Swayam: And Roger hamare academics field ke guru
Bob: But point kya he guys?
Smita: Hum sab yaha ek sath?
Swayam: Actually. Well, kuch cheeje college me ho rahi he jo pehle kabhi nahi huyi.
Sharon: Exactly guys, the thing is ki GS ki post suddenly empty ho gayi he aur hum nahi chahte ki koyi bhi random student aake apna naam de de. To hum soch rahe the ki agar aap me se koi consider kare is post ko to it will be great.
Swayam: Yeah guys at least, apply for the position.
Sharon: Right
Swayam: Aap log har criteria me fit bethate ho
Rob: Guys, Itani badi responsibility aur me? I really don't think I can take this guys.
Smita: Ham log apne department me hi itana busy hote he ki aur kisi cheez ke liye time hi nahi milata. Mujse to nahi hoga.
Roger: GS and me? Not my thing. (Same dialogues as in the show. I thought it was okay. Hope you don't mind.)
Rob: Guys, consider karne ke liye thanks but agar esi bat he to why don't you consider yourselves
Sharon: Umm
Swayam: I wish
Sharon: The things is ki rules ke accordingly cultural team aur kuch nahi kar sakti so⊠we're tied.
Swayam: Yeah.
Smita: I hope hame acha GS mile
Swayam: Its okay guys thanks
Sharon: yeah thanks. Thanks for coming. (They leave)
Sharon: (sighing) Great. Now what?
Swayam: (thinking) Ek aur idea he.
Swayam calls Rey. Rey is with Taani talking to her, they too are trying to decide what actions should be taken. Rey attends the call and they decide to meet with the whole team at Rey's house.
Chapter 62- The candidate
All twelve of the team- Rey, Swayam, Taani, Sharon, Nil, Vicky, Neha, Rinni, Vishakha, Amar, Simmi, Bharat meet at Rey's house. Some sitting on the sofa and some on the floor. They all were thinking about the candidate.
They all thought that Taani as she is the AGS, she would be the best. But Taani refused. Her defense was that, she would surely mess it up. Everyone thought that Taani would be best because of her skills and records and Rey even tried to blackmail her emotionally, but Taani didn't want to. Swayam also agreed to it.
Rey: But why Swayam? I mean, Alien is the perfect choice.
Taani was irritated. She felt she is better as AGS.
Swayam: No Rey, Taani is right. She can't stand up. Firstly because she is very knew in the collegeâŠ
Neha: Shivam newer is⊠(Everyone agreed)
Swayam: (Going on) And secondly because, she can't take that right now. She is not matured enough for it. (Everyone confused. What was he saying?) I mean, she takes her decisions by heart. If she faced some problem then she would freak out aur problem wo face kar payegi ya nahi ye hame nahi pata. And as a GS, decisions affect the whole college. Har decision professionally lena padta he. So, you know she is not the right person. She is used to being dependent on others.
Taani: (irritated and angry) I take it as a challenge bhai.
Swayam: (giving her a sharp look and a bit angrily) This is not the time Taani. You know I am right. Lets just focus on the situation right now.
Everyone exchanged looks. Swayam was in a bad mood. Taani was still irritated but she knew her bhai was right. He and Rey both knew her inside out. But she took that problem to the side like her brother asked. Rey stayed neutral in this.
Sharon was not an option As a CS.
Swayam as ACS was out of the consideration.
Nil backed out as he didn't feel he could do it.
Bharat had speech and English problem so no.
Vicky's academic record was not good enough.
Simmi did not feel right to be the leader.
Rinni felt she could but she was still not an option.
So, Amar was the right option. The only problem was that he was refusing for that. But they convinced him. Amar's name was given for the elections and they started working on the campaigning ideas. Shivam started his cheap tactics for campaigning. The team decided on ideas which highlight Amar's talents like food, dance, cheerleading, Taani and Swayam wrote poems, Taani was a great artist so she even drew sketches and pictures and Sharon and Taani worked on the design section for the betterment of the college. Rey was holding the speech department. Amar's and others speech he decided. Campaigning budget control was controlled by Rey and Swayam. Simmi and Rinni were holding the gossip department, how to make others see Amar's talent and make him popular. Nil, Vicky, Bharat and Amar were working on 'Give me the beat guys'. They worked as a team. VP was impressed by their campaigning and so was the whole college, and Amar was leading in support from the students.
But Shivam knew very well how to use the one advantage he had. Once again he knew the weakness of Amar. He was going to use it to his advantage.
Chapter 63- Girls room
Amar and Rinni's love blossomed further during elections. Amar came to know the real reason why all were voting him and it disturbed his self confidence. This tactics of voting because of his unusualness became strong because of Shivam's speech. Taani and Swayam started to get idea of what Shivam was upto. His speech and the people's reaction worried Swayam. But both believed that they still had upper hand in support so Amar will win. So they both decided to ignore it. As they didn't consider Amar's self respect in this. They decided to ignore it.
Taani had been pondering over Swayam's words when she was thoughtful at home. His words had substance. She knew it. It was just hard to admit. However indivualistic and controlling she was of her life, she always was dependent. She knew it. But hearing this from Swayam, it irritated her. Firstly because, it is really hard to admit your mistake. But Taani could not accept this fault in herself. If we know the problem then we should try to find its solution right? She wanted to get rid of this. She that's why tried to mentally prepare herself to be totally self dependent. She knew she liked to hold on to people while she was emotionally not well. She liked to be in her comfort zone. She knew that she could think practically but in the end it did not matter as she always ended up doing what her heart felt. She was not very professional like Rey, Swayam and Sharon. But there are no problems without solutions. She decided that she would not let her emotions keep control of herself. Her potential was not going to stay hidden because of this lack of professional attitude she had.
During Campaigning, Rey came illegally in college to help in campaigning. Once in a tight situation, Taani helped Rey from getting caught by VP's personal peon by dragging him to the girls' room. Our very favorite girls room scene. The butterflies were flying in Rey's heart. This election was dragging them both closer to each other. Love blossomed further and this strengthened their relationship and made them strong emotionally. They both knew to the core that they both loved each other. They both didn't know if it was made for each other love, true love or anything. These words sound very romantic and lovely, but how do we know if we both are made for each other or not. How to know that the love they felt was true love or not. They both didn't know. And frankly both didn't care about it. What mattered was that they loved each other, they enjoyed each others company and both understood each others mentality and understanding. They both supported and respected each others decisions. There were no sacrifices. They both loved each other because this relationship made them be what they were, it gave them strength. Their relationship acted like water to their plants of talents. They were in love with each other, the others personality, their actions, and their beliefs. Love mattered and nothing else. The only thing mattered was that their life was in their most beautiful phase with the existence and company of each other.
For them both, their friendship or relationship which they didn't know what was called, was very important, very special, it was not a burden, it was the feel of freedom and love. Something else. Something which could not be defined. Love is a very complex feeling. This relationship, this feeling, use ek word me define nahi kar sakte. Jese Swayam kehte he. Love covers it all happiness, sadness, dard, gussa, takrar, excitement, love, helplessness, physical appeal, platonic relation, affection, attachment, kindness, compassion, selflessness, concern, desire, romantic feelings, devotion,complexities everything. It cannot be defined in one word.
Taani sometimes felt ki it was nice ki she had a break up first. Then she met Rey. Jese Swayam usako kehte the ki 'jo hota he achhe ke liye', she sometimes found it to be true. Though Rey usake liye khud se jyada important the, love usake liye jaan se jyada important tha, this break up made her remind time to time that there is more in life than love. Love is just an unbreakable part of life, but it is not life. More things matters in life than love. Our dreams, ambitions, family, friends mattered. Rey knew the balance between Dil Dosti Dance the way he was, but Taani was just realizing the different aspects of life. She was very much to say in frank words weak at heart, helpless by her emotions. Her emotions ruled her, which sometimes was a problem. But this phase of her life, the love for Rey, was making her realize that if thought negatively love is a weakness, but if thought positively, love is strength to live life to its fullest and for her it was the most important thing in her life.
For Rey, love was everything. He lived alone and while his parents loved him very very much, he was used to living alone. It was not over saying that Taani was the most important person of his life. For him, Love was something he craved, which gave him strength to follow his ambitions, to improve his life, to pursue his dreams. This approach of their relationship had given a more matured and lively way to him. He was stronger than ever in the company of Taani.
Back to the track, Rey wanted to have this beautiful feeling with Taani to be his forever. Somehow, he could not imagine his life, his future without her. Like in every decision of his, when we think about its effect on ourselves first, Rey thought first about Taani. His priority she was. She was his sun, the brightness of his life. She was his part. Part of himself. He could not imagine himself without her. Like she was part of his personality. He could not imagine his personality, his existenence without her. He could not stop thinking about her. Every thought of his, every dream of his, had her in it. Rey was helpless against this feeling. He loved her. Love seemed like a weak word to explain this feeling he had for her and he wanted her. He wanted her to be his.
By the third person view, (taken Sharon) she thought they both were best for each other. Rey was very impulsive and he needed someone like Taani who could give his thought process the right direction. Taani needed someone matured and practical like him. And Swayam anyways had no idea about what was brewing between his best friend and his favorite sister. With days, Swayam had calmed himself of that Shivam incident and his irritation that Shivam used those words for Taani also was gone.
Back to the scene, Taani put his finger on Rey's lips. They shared some⊠you know what same as in the show. And Rey started to make a move on her. He wanted her to admit her feelings. But as decided by Taani, she was not the one to give easy win to anyone. She wanted this to be a challenge. And Rey's monologue, you all know.
Precap: Okay. Am I boring you? I know all those thinking talks and all. I don't know why I am writing it. I mean I am just writing it feeling these characters. For me, the emotional attachment matters more. So, I need an honest and only honest opinions, totally frank opinions without any biasness from your side, of my development of the story okay? I want to know if its boring, entertaining or what. Please honest and frank opinions or criticisms they matter to me a lot. Okay guys? Just because I am your friend it does not mean that you have to tell me its good. The true opinions is what I want. And I am sorry I took so much time. I had to prepare my self to write this story as there had been a big gap between the chapters.
Story: Precap- The result of election, end of Rey's suspension and his attempts to trap Taani.
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