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Recap
Divya felt such a heart wrenching pain! She realized her dreams and reality are like day and night—can never be together at the same time and same place!
Part Nineteen: The decree
Amar noticed the shadow of sadness in her expressive face. He tried to divert her from her current thoughts. "Tell me, how have you been? I knew you went to Cornell and then joined UNDP. But didn't know how you actually were?" They arrived in front of the ice-cream stand. Amar asked what she will have and ordered for them.
Divya was surprised he knew what she did in these years. "How did you know I went to Cornell?"
"That's easy. Did you ever google yourself? It's almost impossible to disappear in the world of internet." He chuckled.
Divya smiled. "I was well. Thanks. How about you?"
Amar became unmindful for a moment but regained his confident self and looked directly at her and said, "busy." Divya couldn't read his eyes but she was sure they meant something – he wanted to tell her something! What Amar? Why for once can't you say it loud you really care about me, care about us! There is an US! May be I am the one who is day dreaming all the time. May be you never wanted me to be any one special-may be you always thought of me as just a friend. Oh God!
She breathed out loud. Looked at him and said as nonchalantly as possible,
"That's understandable. You have so many patents at such a young age and you are a full time faculty at Harvard. Obviously you had to work hard."
"Well I didn't work hard for these." He smiled in a sulking but mysterious way and delved into the ice-cream the waiter handed them.
"Why did you work hard then?"
He looked up, a sudden shade of grief covered his eyes for a split second. "To keep my mind off of something." He said in a melancholy voice. But straight away tried to be jovial, "So tell me about yourself. I don't see any ring in your finger, no sindur either. Still waiting for Mr. Right?"
He doesn't know! May be he doesn't care either. Or does he? How am I going to say this! Divya felt she is signing the decree of her own death. She took a deep breath, and whispered because she didn't want him to hear the crack in her voice.
"Amar, I- I am engaged to Sharad. He proposed last night and I..." She touched her neck and twined her fingers in the chain which had her ring. Her heart became numb; she looked down and could barely speak.
He sat silent for a second but kept looking at her. "That's--That's wonderful news. Congratulations! Sharad told me there was a surprise for me tonight. I am sure you two would have all the happiness in the world!" he smiled but this time he didn't meet her gaze, rather looked down at his shoes.
Divya didn't speak for a minute but then added, "Sharad told me there was a surprise for me too. So the surprise is you!" She whispered, also looking down, trying her best to control her uncontrollable emotions, to stop tears forming in her eyes and force a smile on her face.
"Poor Sharad. His surprise for us is ruined." He concealed his sigh "It's getting dark. Do you want to ride again or want to head home? "
"Let's head home." Divya replied.
The entire ride home, both of them were quiet and listened to Frank Sinatra's melodious voice on the radio.
Blue Moon
You saw me standing alone
Without a dream in my heart
Without a love of my own
Blue Moon
You know just what I was there for
You heard me saying a prayer for
Someone I really could care for
And then there suddenly appeared before me
The only one my arms will hold
I heard somebody whisper please adore me
And when I looked to the Moon it turned to gold
You know just what I was there for
You heard me saying a prayer for
Someone I really could care for
And then there suddenly appeared before me
The only one my arms will hold
I heard somebody whisper please adore me
And when I looked to the Moon it turned to gold
Blue Moon
Now I'm no longer alone
Without a dream in my heart
Without a love of my own
And then there suddenly appeared before me
The only one my arms will ever hold
I heard somebody whisper please adore me
And when I looked the Moon had turned to gold
The lyrics wrenched both their hearts, both tried their best not to show it, not to meet each other's eyes but secretly glance at each other as if they will never see each other again. Amar dropped her off at her place, said goodbye and went away.
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