MT: Ladies, take note

I literally am not a people pleaser and never will be one

what abt u ppl?

I like you about that. I don't think I'm a people pleaser either. My actions or behaviour depends on how the other person treats me Or behaves with me. If they are nice with me I would be nice with them too, if they behaves the opposite I do the same or I just ignore...like most of the time I either care or ignore, only two modes depending on the person. I don't have time for hate or grudges.

Honestly I have had people pleasing tendencies in the past, and didn't even know that it could stem from ingrained traumas/attachment styles etc until I was like 16, educated myself about mental health and allowed myself to introspect over uncomfortable truths. Tried observing myself from a third person kind of perspective and it hit me that I had this pattern of giving in to people gaslighting me and was always ultimately expected to apologize even when I did nothing wrong or asked for the bare minimum. All that only to avoid conflict because I'd been subjected to seeing violence since early in life. It's easy to attract energy-sapping parasites when you have those tendencies, but by now, I've personally thankfully learnt, managed to get a grip over things and make sure to prioritize my self-respect, even if in the moment it feels selfish. There are still little moments of struggle but it's thankfully rarer and manageable :)

Took me quite a bit of time and efforts tbh because it's not easy to dismantle those traumas; they can be so deeply rooted in you. So to anyone who might need to hear this, remember you are your own sun 🫶

It's hard to please so many people then you end up not pleasing yourself

If I was a people pleaser I would stop being Deepika's fan

Originally posted by: DushtKanya

Honestly I have had people pleasing tendencies in the past, and didn't even know that it could stem from ingrained traumas/attachment styles etc until I was like 16, educated myself about mental health and allowed myself to introspect over uncomfortable truths. Tried observing myself from a third person kind of perspective and it hit me that I had this pattern of giving in to people gaslighting me and was always ultimately expected to apologize even when I did nothing wrong or asked for the bare minimum. All that only to avoid conflict because I'd been subjected to seeing violence since early in life. It's easy to attract energy-sapping parasites when you have those tendencies, but by now, I've personally thankfully learnt, managed to get a grip over things and make sure to prioritize my self-respect, even if in the moment it feels selfish. There are still little moments of struggle but it's thankfully rarer and manageable :)

Took me quite a bit of time and efforts tbh because it's not easy to dismantle those traumas; they can be so deeply rooted in you. So to anyone who might need to hear this, remember you are your own sun 🫶

You think i am?

Originally posted by: Beautyful_Mess

Every word you just said. Mine was limited to selected few when I was younger cause I had fear of losing people but I also learned to deal with it as I grew older.

So glad that you pulled through It can be a real task to even take cognizance of these things.

Originally posted by: DushtKanya

So glad that you pulled through It can be a real task to even take cognizance of these things.

Originally posted by: mintyblue

I literally am not a people pleaser and never will be one

what abt u ppl?

I wish I could be like that