FF: Ishq-e-Watan *Chapter 78 Posted* - Page 33

CHAPTER 23

OF MISUNDERSTANDINGS AND DATES

Sid leaned over the parapet, staring at the distant lights from the city.

'Tu kahan chala gaya tha? Maine tujhe kitna dhoonda.'

'Main hamesha tera dhyaan rakhunga.'

'Ab dekh, Champ. Yeh chhota baby teri zimmedaari hai. Iska dhyaan rakhna.'

'Tu m-mujhe kabhi n-nahi chodhkar j-jaayega, na?'

'Tu kahan chala gaya tha? Maine tujhe kitna dhoonda.'

"Siddharth?" He looked over his shoulder. Sanju. He wordlessly turned back. "Tu abhi tak Monami ke laane pareshaan hogo? Woh theek hai."

He hummed in acknowledgement. She sighed.

"Siddharth..."

"Mujhe baat nahi karni hai", he muttered.

"Chhoti si baat ke laane itna pareshaan naa ho."

His gaze lifted. "Aapke liye woh chhoti si baat hogi, ma'am. Meri liye nahi hai."

She sighed. "Siddharth, tu chhoti si baat ko zaroorat se zyaada badha raho hai. Itni gambhir baat bhi naa hai. Monami theek toh hogo ab. Kaa zaroorat hai itna dukhi hone ki?"

His eyebrows pulled together. His jaw clenched, before he took a deep breath. "Main kyun, kab, kaise react kar raha hoon, aapne bina samjhe hi yeh declare kar diya ki meri feelings insignificant hain?"

"Hum yeh bilkul naa keh raho hain", she said. "Hum sirf itna keh raho hain ki Monami theek hai ab. Tujhe itni tension lene ki zaroorat naa hai."

He shook his head. "Baat yeh nahi hai ki Monami theek hai ya nahi. Baat yeh hai..." He paused, staring at her. "Are you even interested in understanding my feelings? Kyunki aapne toh usse pehle hi declare kar diya ki main overreact kar raha hoon."

She scowled. "Hum par bhadakne ki koi zaroorat naa hai. Hum sirf isliye aaye the kyunki tera mood achha naa tha."

He looked away. He took a deep breath. "Mujhe thodi der akele rehna hai." He shoved his hands in his pockets, walking off.

She didn't call after him.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

"Aaj toh tu badhi khush lag rahi hai", Suman ji said, smiling at Koel. "Kya baat hai?"

She shrugged, shaking her head. "Kuchh nahi. Bas aise hi mood achha hai. Aaj Saturday hai, na? Finally, hafta khatam hua."

"#Right", Chitra said happily. "Hafta khatam. Aaj half day aur kal #holiday hai. Yay."

Monami bit into the toast, tilting her head as she stared at Sid. He had his head down, chewing his toast disinterestedly. She nudged him lightly. He glanced up. Her eyebrows pulled together in a questioning glance but he just sighed in response.

"Abhi thodi der mein batata hoon. Akele mein", he muttered. She nodded. Her gaze fell on Koel, who was quieter than usual as well, but unlike Sid's droopy frown, she had a small, content smile.

Monami eyed her silently, absentmindedly listening to the cadets. Koel peeked at someone, her smile widening. Monami followed her gaze, finding Faizi looking at her too. She tilted her head. What? Did she miss something? They were friends, that everyone knew, but she had never seen Koel sneaking glances at him like that.

'Faizi Sir, aap... mere saath dance karoge?'

'Aap hume dance ke liye puchhe aur hum manaa kar dein? Aisa kaise ho sakta hai?'

'Yeh kya chal raha hai? Maine kuchh miss kar diya kya?'

She glanced at Karan. Did he find it weird too? He was typing something on his phone. He glanced up suddenly when Faizi said something and the two glanced at Koel. Karan rolled his eyes, shaking his head. His gaze lifted to Monami's, meeting her eyes. She quickly turned away, dropping her head. She winced.

'Buddhu', she scolded herself. 'Aise mat dekha kar kisi ko bhi. Pata nahi kya sochne lagenge. Teri curiosity ke chakkar mein koi tujhe creepy, psycho bhooth hi naa samajh le. Waise creepy, psycho samajh sakte hain Karan Sir par bhooth toh nahi samjhenge. Unhe toh bhoothon par vishwaas nahi hai, na? Khadoos kahin ke. Achhe waale bhooth ki existence ko dismiss kar rahe the. Unke saamne toh achha bhooth bhi offend ho kar bura bankar hi aayega.'

Her gaze lifted to Koel, who smiled to herself, sneaking another glance at Faizi.

'Par yahan toh kuchh chal raha hai. Faizi Sir toh friendly hi hain, par Koel... aisa behave nahi karti.' She smiled slightly. They looked cute together.

Her curiosity sated, she turned her attention back to Sid. He still didn't make an effort to even pretend to listen. His mostly uneaten toast laid on the plate, and he pushed it around with a finger, chasing it around the plate. Monami nudged him again and he lifted his gaze again.

"Khaane par gussa nahi hote", she muttered. "Khaana tujhse gussa ho gaya, na, phir vomit karta rahega."

Monami shook her head, pushing the plate away. She turned away, staring quietly outside the window. Sid huffed. 'Oye, Moti Billi', he said sternly. 'Khaane par gussa nahi hote. Khaana tujhse gussa ho gaya, na, phir vomit karti rahegi. Chal, chup chaap kha le.' She sighed, picking up the plate.

Sid smiled slightly. "Mera dialogue mujhi par?"

She shrugged. "Recycle and reuse?"

He chuckled. He gulped down the rest of his toast with his coffee in two huge bites, standing up. Monami frowned. 'Itni bhi jaldi nahi khaana tha. Isne toh jaadugar ki tarah khaana gayab kar diya.' She quickly finished her own breakfast, gulping down her coffee and rushing out after him.

He was on the terrace.

"Chal", she said, walking up to him. "Bolna shuru kar."

"Mera aur Sanju ma'am ka jhagda ho gaya", he said, crossing his arms.

"Kis baat par?"

He sighed, narrating the tale quickly. She hummed. She sat down on the parapet, swinging her legs over. She patted the spot next to her. He leaned over, looking down before backing away. "Zyaada upar hai", he muttered. She twisted her body, leaning against the pillar.

"Tune Sanju ma'am ko yeh bataaya ki tujhe bura kyun laga?"

He shook his head. "Unhe farak padta? Unhe meri feelings se koi matlab nahi hai."

"Nahi padta farak, toh unhe yeh bhi nahi farak padta ki tera mood kharaab tha. Isliye hi aaye the, na, tere paas, kyunki tera mood kharaab tha?"

"Par aakar toh yeh hi kaha, na, ki main overreact kar raha hoon?" Sid said.

"Toh tune bhi toh dhang se yeh baat explain nahi kari, na, ki tu kyun upset hai?" She titled her head slightly. "Sid... Sanju ma'am tujhe sirf ek mahine se jaante hain. Woh teri feelings ko bina blole thodi naa samajh jaayenge."

He looked down, fidgeting with his bracelet. He sighed, leaning against the parapet. "Par..."

"Par kya?" She tugged on his arm and he looked up. "Tu aur Bala, aur tu aur Koel, bhi toh dost hai, na? Tu bina kahe kya unki har baar samajhta hai?" He shook his head. "Yeh bhi toh ho sakta hai, na, ki kabhi tujhe jo baat insignificant lag raha hai, woh unke liye bahut significant ho."

"Par woh yeh baat toh kam se kam puchh sakti hai, na, ki itna sad kyun tha?"

"Tu khud unko ideal response nahi de raha aur unse expect karta hai ki woh tujhe ideal response de?" She hit his arm a little. "Tu kyun yeh soch raha hai ki unhe yeh kehna chahiye tha, ya woh kehna chahiye tha. Tu unki intention dekh, na? Tu sad tha aur woh tujhe happy karna chahte the."

He hummed. He sighed, nodding. "Meri galti hai, phir?"

She smiled a little. "Baat galti ki nahi hai. Baat sirf samajhne ki hai. Tujhe sirf itna samajhna hai ki tu Sanju ma'am se thoda sa zyaada expect karne laga hai. Jitna zyaada tu expect karega, utni zyaada hi tujhe disappointment hogi. Tu jaa aur Sanju ma'am se baat kar aur apna point samjha ki tu kyun aur kya feel kar raha tha."

He nodded. He kissed her forehead. "Thanks, bro. You're the best."

She smiled, watching him run off. She turned her gaze to the city, leaning against the pillar.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

Faizi closed the door of the room behind himself. He sat down on an empty chair, next to Karan, who was watching Sanju quietly as well. She was hobbling back and forth from her cupboard to the bed, setting her clothes. Usually, she'd be punching away things in the gym, but her sprained foot had her restricted. It only made her angrier.

She turned her gaze towards them after a couple of minutes, sighing a little. Karan wordlessly gestured to Monami's tidy bed, and she sat down, sighing.

"Bataane ka mann nahi hai ya mahurat ka intezaar kar rahi hai?" Karan asked after a minute.

She heaved a sigh, launching into her tale and explaining everything. The two hummed.

"Tujhe pata hai, Sanju? Jab Bhaiya pehli baar mission par gaye the, main 8 saal ka tha. Mujhe pata tha log shaheed hote hain, par kabhi kisi ka marna paas se nahi experience kara tha, isliye mujhe yeh baat dhang se samajh nahi aayi thi. Sabne mujhe hamesha usse door rakhne ki hi koshish kari thi jab main chhota tha. Mujhe laga Bhaiya gaye hain, toh waapas toh aayenge hi, jaise hamesha aate hain, par Batra ma'am ko bahut darr lag raha tha. Mujhe bilkul samajh nahi aaya ki unhe itna darr kyun lag raha tha. Ab jab badha ho gaya hoon, toh samajh aata hai ki unhe darr kyun lag raha tha. Yeh baat bataane ka yeh purpose hai ki kabhi kabhi jo cheezen hume unimportant lagti hai, ya chhoti lagti hain, woh kisi aur ke liye bahut badhi hoti hain."

Sanju nodded slowly, trying to digest his words.

'Aapke liye woh chhoti si baat hogi, ma'am. Meri liye nahi hai.'

'Main kyun, kab, kaise react kar raha hoon, aapne bina samjhe hi yeh declare kar diya ki meri feelings insignificant hain?'

"Sanju, tumne kal ek baat notice kari?" Faizi asked. "Jab Siddharth ne Monami ko sorry bola, toh woh iss baat par nahi bola tha ki woh ghabra gayi thi, woh iss baat par bola tha ki jab Monami use dhoond rahi thi, toh woh nahi tha uske saath."

'Baat yeh nahi hai ki Monami theek hai ya nahi. Baat yeh hai...'

Sanju heaved a sigh. "Hume poori baat sunni aur samajhni chahiyo thi, na?"

Faizi smiled a little. "Log ek baar mein samajh nahi aate hain, Sanju." His grin widened a little. "Kabhi kabhi lagta hai ki koi samajh aa gaya aur phir agle din woh kuchh aisa kar deta hai jisse lagta hai ki hume toh kuchh pata hi nahi hai uss insaan ke baare mein."

The two tilted their heads, nodding a little in agreement to his words. There was a knock on the door before it opened a little. Siddharth peeked in.

"Aa jao, Siddharth", Faizi called. He gave Sanju a look as the two majors stood up, leaving the other two to talk.

"Isko kya sapna aata hai ki humaari baat kab khatam ho gayi hai? Doosri baar aise time par aaya hai," Karan said, as they walked back. He punched Faizi's arm. "Tujhe kyun nahi aa sakte aise sapne? Monami finally mujhse baat kar rahi thi, aur tu aa gaya beech mein."

Faizi rubbed his arm. "Uska talent hai. Humaare paas nahi hai ab, toh hum kya karein?" He smiled slightly. "Par hume dikh raha hai ki tum Monami se baat karne ke liye kitne eager ho."

He glared at him. "Tu phir shuru ho gaya uss line par? Main sirf uski help karna chahta hoon." Faizi just smiled, making Karan huff in irritation.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

Sid grabbed a chair, sitting down. "Hi", he said. She nodded a little in greeting. She eyed him. He didn't seem angry anymore. She relaxed a little.

"Gussa shaant ho gayo tera?" She asked.

He winced a little. "Haan, woh..." He paused. "Let me explain. Main upset isliye nahi tha kyunki Monu ko panic attack aaya tha yaa woh itna dari hui thi. Main upset isliye tha kyunki jab woh mujhe dhoond rahi thi, main nahi tha uske paas." He sighed. "Ma'am... Monu, na, mere liye bahut zyaada important hai. Hum ek doosre ko hamesha se jaante hain. Jab chhote the, tab toh aur log the humaare saath- humaare parents, par badhe hue, toh... humaari mothers toh rahi nahi, aur hum dono ka relationship humaare fathers ke saath kaafi complicated ho gaya. Phir, bas hum dono hi bache ek doosre ke paas. Uska dhyaan rakhna meri responsibility hai, aur yeh responsibility main bahut seriously leta hoon. Yeh mere liye big deal hai."

She nodded a little. "Tera rishta Monami ke saath kaisa hai, woh tum dono jaante ho, aur tum dono hi samajhte ho. Par... hum tujhe yeh baat zaroor bataa sakto hain ki tu uska bahut achhe se dhyaan rakhto hain, aur yeh baat Monami ko bhi pato hai. Kal bhi tha tu uske saath. Toh apne aap ko itna kosa mat kar."

He frowned. "Sorry but what's kosa?" Sanju sighed, shaking her head in exasperation.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

Faizi held up a green t-shirt. "Yeh?"

Karan scrunched his nose up. "Kaccha kela lagega."

"Kaccha kela?" He muttered in confusion, keeping it back in. He tilted his head, picking up another one. "Yeh?"

He frowned. "Yeh kya hai? Kisi 2 saal ke bacche ko finger paint karne ke liye pakda diya tha kya? Baby isse achha pattern banaa legi. Jala de ise. Pocha banaane layak bhi nahi hai."

"Itni bhi buri nahi hai." Faizi picked up a black shirt, holding it up. "Yeh theek hai, na?"

"Woh sadak mein black tar daalta hai? Tu woh lagega. Apne upar white lines bhi paint karle, chalta phirta sadak lagega." He paused a little. "Ironic, nahi? Sadak chalegi?"

"Karan, yaar, hadd hoti hai. Simple black shirt hai. Tum, na, bakwaas mat karo", Faizi snapped. Karan's lips tugged up in an amused smile, and he chuckled a little. "Tum humaare saath mazaak kar rahe ho?"

"Tujhe itni der baad samajh aa raha hai?" Karan asked, chuckling. "Kuchh bhi pehen le. Itna kya soch raha hai?"

"Date hai, Janaab", he said. "Aise thodi naa hota hai."

"Jaakar khaana hi toh khaa kar aana hai. Restaurant jaa rahe ho, na? Use tujh mein interest hai yaa tere kapdon mein?"

Faizi rolled his eyes. "Date khaane ke liye nahi hoti hai. Aur achha dikhna zaroori hota hai date par." He picked up one of the t-shirt Karan had rejected. "Sach sach batao. Yeh theek hai kya?"

Karan shrugged. "Haan, theek hai", he said.

"Hum... hum kaccha kela toh nahi lagenge, na?" Faizi asked.

He tilted his head, inspecting it. "Naa. Kacche kele ka color thoda sa dark hota hai isse. Ghaas lag sakta hai. Ghaas ka yeh hi color hota hai, na?"

"Karan!" Faizi said. "Hum, na, Batra ma'am ko complain kar denge ki tum hume bahut tang karte ho."

"Achha, theek hai", he said, chuckling. "Black shirt pehen le."

"Pakka?"

"Haan, haan. Black mein sab achhe lagte hain."

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

Koel quickly closed the door behind her, hurrying out. She was almost late. Faizi must be waiting. She turned the corner. She froze when she heard the noises approach, and she winced, taking a couple of steps back. She was yanked aside suddenly, a bandaged hand pressing against her mouth. Her eyes widened.

Monami.

She quickly pushed open the door of a store room, pulling her inside and shutting it. A second later, lots of footsteps passed by and Koel relaxed a little. "Agar sn-sneak out k-karna hai, toh b-bina d-dekha k-kaun k-karta hai?" Monami asked.

"Woh main..."

"D-Date par j-jaa r-rahi thi?"

Her eyes widened. "Tumhe kisne bataaya? S-Sabko pata hai kya yeh?"

She shook her head. She leaned back against the wall, a small smile on her face. "Aise k-kapdon mein t-tum aur k-kahan jaa r-rahi hogi?" She asked, crossing her arms. Koel looked down at her dress. She sighed.

"Monami... please kisi aur ko mat bataana yeh. I don't want anyone to know."

She smiled at her, nodding. "S-Sure."

"Sid ko bhi nahi."

Monami imitated zipping her lips, and throwing the key away. She looked her up and down. "One th-thing m-missing", she said. She unhooked her bracelet. She grabbed her wrist, hooking it onto her. "P-Perfect. F-Faizi S-Sir dekhenge toh d-dekhte hi r-reh j-jaayenge."

"Tum kya mind reader ya kuchh ho?" Koel asked. "Ab yeh kaise pata tumhe ki meri date Faizi ke saath hai?"

"J-Jab m-mere kamre mein d-dance p-party ho r-rahi thi, toh t-tumne F-Faizi Sir ko kh-khud d-dance ke l-liye p-puchha. Aur welcome p-party mein bhi s-sirf woh hi ek l-ladke the j-jinke s-saath tumne d-dance kara. Aaj bhi, tum e-extra h-happy l-lag rahi thi, aur F-Faizi Sir ko d-dekh r-rahi thi, aur woh bhi t-tumhe d-dekh r-rahe the. I th-thought aap d-dono ek d-doosre ko p-pasand k-karte ho, d-didn't know a-actually s-saath ho."

"It's a recent development", she admitted.

Monami smiled. "I h-hope t-tum h-happy ho." She opened the door a little, peeking out. "I th-think r-raasta c-clear hai. Ek s-second." She opened the door wider, stepping out. She gestured her out. She pulled her along, helping her out of the academy. "H-Have fun."

"Thank you", she said. "Help karne ke liye bhi."

Monami gave her a thumbs up. "Ab j-jao, F-Faizi Sir w-wait k-kar r-rahe hain."

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

Koel laced her hands with Faizi, sighing happily, as they walked on the street. Evening had fallen, the sky a beautiful shade of pink and orange. It spanned over them, seen amidst the canopy of trees.

"Nice date", she said.

He smiled. "Ek cheez bachi hai", he said.

Her eyebrows furrowed. "Kya?" She glanced at her watch. "7 baj gaye hain. 8 se late jaayenge toh daant padegi."

"8 se late nahi hoga", he assured. "Hume ek bahut achhi jagah pata hai, jahan par bahut achha dessert milta hai. Bas 2 minute lagenge."

Koel hooked her arm with his. "Toh chalo."

Faizi pushed open the door to the shop, letting her go in first. "Yahan ka blueberry cheesecake bahut zyaada achha hai", Faizi said."Kuchh aur try karo yaa naa karo, yeh toh try karna banta hai."

"Blueberry cheesecake?" She perked up. "Mujhe bahut pasand hai."

He placed the order, before pulling back a chair for her. She smiled at him, sitting down and Faizi sat down in front of her. "Tumhe pata hai, jab main chhoti thi toh mujhe cheesecake itna pasand tha ki main har roz maangti thi. Aur jab milta tha, toh chodhti nahi." The waiter placed the two plates in front of them. Koel smiled at him. "Thank you."

"Humne pehli baar cheesecake tab try kara tha, jab hum 12 saal ke the. Jahan hum rehte the, wahan par cheesecake aas paas ke kisi bhi shop par nahi hote the. Phir ek baar hum apni Ammi ke dost ke ghar gaye the. Jab unhe pata chala ki hume meetha bahut pasand hai, toh woh hume lekar gaye the aur tab humne pehli baar cheesecake khaaya tha."

She clicked her tongue. "Tumne apni life ke pehle 12 saal bina cheesecake ke kaise nikaale?" He laughed a little. He shrugged, eating a bite. Koel took a big bite, licking her lips. "So good."

Faizi held up a spoonful to her mouth. She glanced up at him, a slight blush spreading on her cheeks. His lips tugged up in a smile, and he nodded to it. She leaned forward, and he fed her the bite.

Her left hand slid over to his, clutching it lightly. He squeezed back, entangling his fingers with hers as they both ate. Shy, comfortable silence fell between them.

As they walked back to the jeep, Faizi narrated a tale of an incident in his days as a cadet. Koel smiled to herself, glancing down at their hands. They hadn't let go since the café. She didn't want to let go.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

Sid looked up when the door to the mess opened. Koel walked in, a small smile on her face. His eyes narrowed slightly, inspecting her. He tilted his head.

"Koel, tu kahan thi?" Suman ji asked. "Suman ji ne tujhe khaane ke time kitna dhoonda. Kahan chali gayi thi?"

"Woh... woh mujhe bhookh nahi thi toh main thodi der chhat par chali gayi thi."

"Chhat par?" Bala repeated. "Chatt par toh main dekhkar aaya tha. Aap toh nahi dikhi mujhe."

"Wahin thi main", she said. "Tune dhang se dekha nahi hoga."

He shrugged, nodding. "Shayad", he conceded.

"B-Bala, tera b-birthday aa r-raha hai, na?" Monami interjected. "T-Tujhe kya ch-chahiye g-gift mein?"

"Oh, haan. Main toh bhool hi gayi thi. Bala, #gift bataa. Kya chahiye tujhe?" Chitra asked. "Kal chhuti hai, na, hum kal le aayenge."

Bala frowned. "Taufa? Mujhe apne janamdin par kabhi taufa nahi mila. Hume khaane ke liye mil jaata tha, woh hi bahut tha. Taufe ke paise kahan se laate." He grinned. "Jo bhi doge, main khushi khushi le lunga."

The cadets glanced at each other. "Tune apna janamdin kabhi nahi manaaya?" Suman ji asked. He shook his head.

"Bala G bro, iss baar tera birthday blast hone waala hai", Sid declared. "21 saal ka hoga, na? Sabki kasar nikaal denge."

Koel hit his arm. "Hum academy mein hain, Sid. Zyaada badhe promises mat kar. Pata nahi trainers kya allow karenge."

"Bala, hum sab tumhaara janamdin achhe se manaayenge", Prem ji said. "Agar trainers ijaazat nahi bhi denge, toh hum aas paas waale ravivaar ko tumhaare liye kuchh karenge."

Bala smiled a little. "Sach mein?"

"#Of course", Chitra said. "#Birthday toh special hona hi chahiye."

"Mere liye, na, kabhi koi cake nahi lekar aaya. Hum cake laa sakte hain?" He asked.

"C-Cake ke b-bina b-birthday h-hota hai?" Monami asked. "C-Cake toh aa-aayega hi." She smiled at him. "T-Tumhe jo ch-chahiye, woh h-hum s-sab k-karenge, as l-long as t-trainers m-manaa naa karein."

He grinned. "Hum balloons laa sakte hain? Aur... aur hum sab milkar bahut saara khaana khaayenge. Aur..."

The cadets smiled as he raved on, talking about food and dancing and music. They weren't sure what they were allowed to do, but they would try their absolute best to make it a good one for him.

CHAPTER 24

A LAX SUNDAY

"Karan, tu aa raha hai, na, aaj?" Param asked.

"Haan, haan, bola toh", Karan said. He sifted through the papers, putting them in different piles. "2-3 ghante mein aa jaunga. Thoda sa kaam hai, par pakka aunga. Achha, suno. Baby kitna gussa hai?"

Param chuckled. "Gussa hai par tujhe dekhte hi saara gussa bhool jaayegi. Tu uski chinta mat kar. Kal bhi uchhal rahi thi ki tu aayega."

He smiled slightly. "Aur Bhabhi ko puchho, na, ki woh mere liye pancakes banaa sakti hain kya?"

"Use pata hai. Kal shaam ho hi mujhe bheja tha samaan laane ke liye."

His smile widened. He filed the organized papers. "Bhabhi ko kehna ki woh best hain."

"Keh dunga", he answered, chuckling a little.

"Bhaiya, main ghar aakar baat karta hoon. Thoda sa kaam hai, woh khatam karna hai."

"Theek hai. Bye."

"Bye."

He pocketed his phone, before picking up the files. He paused, seeing the notes he had made as a guide of PTSD and Monami. He picked up a pen, flipping to the page of 'Habits And Problems.'

'She can get panic attacks when she is reliving a nightmare too many times. She needs distraction and comfort.

Symptoms of Panic Attack- Uneven breathing, shaky hands, sweat, not responding when talked to, increased heart rates, crying. Might be different each time.

Note- Talking or humming is best for distraction, preferably while hugging her or touching her in some form for comfort. Try to spot before she gets a panic attack and distract her.'

He paused, thinking it over, before adding another note.

'Note- Way, way out of my league. Call Siddharth immediately.'

He capped the pen, staring at the page. He tilted his head, reading the notes over. His gaze lingered on the third point he had written almost a week before.

'She can get lost when she is thinking about a nightmare. She does not like to talk too much and prefers to think and deal with it herself. She does not like being touched and it is best to shut up and leave her to her thoughts because she might start to feel that she isn't getting her space.

Note- Needs to be analysed whether she is in the mood to talk or not.'

"Hadd hai", he muttered to himself. "Kabhi nightmare ke baad baat nahi karni hai aur kabhi karni hai. Kabhi yeh khud distracted hoti hai, kabhi ise distraction chahiye. Kabhi koi hug kare, toh panic karti hai, aur kabhi koi nahi kare, toh karti hai."

He heaved a sigh. He leaned against the back of the chair, staring at the notes.

"Monami Mahajan, tumhe samajhna chah raha hoon par tum toh samajh hi nahi aa rahi ho."

'Log ek baar mein samajh nahi aate hain, Sanju. Kabhi kabhi lagta hai ki koi samajh aa gaya aur phir agle din woh kuchh aisa kar deta hai jisse lagta hai ki hume toh kuchh pata hi nahi hai uss insaan ke baare mein.'

"Sahi keh raha tha Faizi. Mujhe laga tha ki mujhe tum samajh aa gayi ho- ek sherni jo apne aap ko duniya se chhupakar rakhti hai." He shook his head. "But you aren't that simple, Monami. Tumhaare baare mein har cheez complicated hai. Tum darr kar karti kya ho, woh tak simple nahi hai." He narrowed his eyes. "But tumhe toh main samajh kar rahunga. I accept the challenge."

He straightened up, picking the files again.

Monami Mahajan was a lot of things.

Entrancingly intriguing was one of them.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

"... Aur phir, hum academy waapas aa gaye", Koel said.

"Hmm", Nikhil said, nodding. Koel chuckled at his serious expression. "Koel, tujhe lagta hai mujhe woh pasand aayenge?"

"I hope so." She propped the phone up on the desk, letting Nikhil get a better angle through the video call. "He's pretty nice. Sab use pasand karte hain."

"Aur woh mujhe pasand karenge?"

"Pakka", Koel said. "Maine use tere baare mein bahut kuchh bataaya hai. And he thinks ki tum dono ki bahut achhi banegi."

Nikhil smiled a little. Her mother bent down, leaning over Nikhil. "Dikhne mein handsome hai? Photo bhej, na? Agar achha nahi laga dikhne mein, toh manaa kar dungi."

Koel rolled her eyes. "Maa! Seriously?"

"Waise, teri Maa ne toh aise hi bola tha ki ladka dekh lena", her father called from somewhere off the screen. "Tune toh sach mein hi dekh liya. Itna seriously nahi lena hota hai har baat ko."

"Arey? Dekh liya toh achhi baat hai, na?" Her mother said. "Ab use achha laga, toh kya problem hai?"

"Maine kab kaha problem hai?"

"Matlab toh woh hi tha, na?"

"Koel, ab toh tune bhi suna. Bol, maine ek baar bhi yeh kaha?"

Koel sighed, shaking her head. Her gaze met Nikhil's, and he facepalmed, shaking his head. She chuckled. "Ek kaam karo", she said. "Aap log ladh lo, main baad mein call karti hoon phir."

"Arey nahi nahi", her father said. "Phir tu apne doston ke saath chali jaayegi, aur dhang se baat hi nahi hogi." He walked into the frame. "Teri Maa toh hamesha ready rehti hai ladne ke liye."

"Papa, aap dono hi hamesha ready rehte ho", Koel said. "Saara blame Maa par mat daalo."

"Dekh, yeh aisa hi karte hain hamesha", her mother said.

"Arey, bas, bas", Nikhil interrupted. "Phir se mat shuru ho jaana."

Koel laughed, as her parents stared at him, affronted. They huffed, making Nikhil facepalm again. "Aap logon ka kuchh nahi ho sakta."

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

"Subah subah itni #fresh air hai, na?" Chitra said, taking a deep breath. "Training waale din toh #drills ki wajah se enjoy hi nahi kar paate."

"Mumbai ke pollution se toh bahut better hai", Koel agreed.

Sid slung an arm over Bala's shoulders. "Bol, Bala G bro. Kuchh special chahiye tujhe birthday ke liye?" He asked. "Yaa apne hisaab se khareed lein?"

Bala grinned. "Bhai ji, main toh khushi khushi le lunga sab kuchh. Main toh bas isi baat par khush hoon ki mujhe taufe mil rahe hain."

"Yeh janamdin tujhe hamesha yaad rahega", Prem ji promised.

"Hum balloons aur decoration toh laa hi sakte hain", Suman ji said. "Sid aur Bala ka kamra sajaa denge, aur Suman ji healthy khaane mein hi kuchh aisa banaa hi degi jo tujhe pasand aayega."

"Guys, raat ko baithkar discuss karte hai, na? Trainers se permission bhi le lenge", Koel said. "Aur jo samaan chahiye hoga, woh special permission lekar weekday par hi le aayenge."

"Abhi ke liye, gifts!" Sid cheered. "Bala G bro, apna gift tu apne birthday waale din hi dekhna. Toh, isliye no coming close jab main shopping kar raha hoon."

"Same", the rest echoed.

Bala looked at them. "Toh main kahan jaaon?" He asked.

"Kahin bhi chala jaa", Koel said. "Thodi shopping kar le, kuchh khaa le. Kisi ko call kar le. Humaara thodi der mein ho jaayega, phir sab ek saath ghoom lenge."

He sighed disappointedly, randomly going into one of the shops as everyone dispersed.

"Yeh kaisa lagega use?" Suman ji asked, holding up a cologne.

Koel shrugged. "Maybe?"

"Woh Sid ka lagaata hai, na? Uske paas apna hoga, toh use achha lagega", she reasoned. Koel nodded in agreement. She smiled, moving to the counter.

Koel idly strolled around the shop, trying to spot something Bala would like. She ran her fingers over a leather jacket. He often eyed Sid's quietly. She checked the size, before grabbing it and turning to the counter.

She paused, glancing at the colognes. She inspected them, picking up one that looked good. She opened it, spraying a little on her wrist. It smelled good.

'Faizi ko pasand aayega kya?' She thought. She glanced around, before dropping her head and staring at it for a few thoughtful seconds. She grabbed it, moving to the counter.

"Yeh dono, please", she said.

"Yes ma'am", the girl said.

"Aap gift pack karte hain?"

She nodded. "Par extra charge hoga."

"No issues. Dono gift pack kar dijiye, alag alag. And uh... alag alag pack karna."

"Sure, ma'am", she said, scanning the items before beginning to wrap the items up. Koel smiled a little. 'Bas... dono ko pasand aaye.'

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

Karan inserted the key into the slot, twisting it. The engine roared to life, and he pulled out of the academy, pausing at the gate to flash his ID for the sign out.

'Chalo', he thought. 'Cheezen finally thodi settle down ho rahi hain. Cadets bhi schedule mein aa gaye hain aur Mission Euphoria bhi khatam. Ab training aur spy par dhyaan dena hai.'

He slowed down, seeing a familiar girl walking down the road. He stopped next to her, and she looked up.

"Kya baat hai, Rani Sahiba?" He asked. "Academy mein exercise kam hoti hai kya jo paida nikal gayi ho? Kahan jaa rahi ho?"

"C-City m-market", Monami answered.

"Aa jao, main chodh deta hoon. Baitho", he said.

She paused hesitantly, before opening the door and climbing in. "Th-Thank you."

He nodded, pushing down on the accelerator. "Baaki sab cadets ke saath kyun nahi gayi tum?"

"M-Mujhe th-thoda k-kaam tha", she said.

"Toh Ustaad ji ko keh deti. Woh kisi ko kehkar tumhe city tak chudhwaa dete", he said.

She looked away. "M-Main nahi ch-chahti thi m-meri w-wajah se k-kisi ko t-takleef ho."

He sighed. "Monami... agar tumhe kuchh ho jaaye, yaa tum safe naa ho, us mein logon ko takleef hogi. City tak chodhne mein nahi. Yeh raaste sunsaan hai aur dono taraf jungle hai. Insaan aur janwaar dono se khatra hai. Agli baar se aisa mat karna", he scolded lightly. "Ustaad ji ke paas nahi jaana, toh mere paas aa jaana. Yaa Faizi yaa Sanju ke paas. Theek hai?" She nodded. She turned her head to look out, watching the trees pass by silently.

He turned his gaze back forward, quietly driving to the city. His phone buzzed in his pocket, and he pulled to the side, taking it out. Bhaiya.

"Ek minute", he said to Monami. He accepted the call. "Haan, Bhaiya?"

"Chhote, kitni der mein aa raha hai tu?"

"Aa raha hoon. Raaste mein hoon."

"Jaldi aa, na?" He snapped. "Sadiyan lagaa deta hai."

He rolled his eyes. "Aa raha hoon. Teleport nahi kar sakta main. Thoda toh patience rakh lo."

"Arey, tere patience ke chakkar mein Baby ne mera sar khaa liya hai. Subah se sau baar sun chuka hoon, 'Chachu kab aa rahe hain?' Har do minute mein puchhne aa jaati hai.'

He smiled slightly. "Raaste mein hoon. Aadhe ghante mein pahunch jaunga. Time bataaya toh tha. Ab main drive kar loon, ya yahin ruka rahoon baat karne ke liye?"

"Toh kar, na, drive? Mana kisne kara hai? Ghar aakar baat karte hain. Aur jaldi aana, warna yeh Baby... Arey, Baby, abhi Chachu se baat kari hai. Aa rahe hain, meri maa. Raaste-" He cut the call.

Karan shook his head slightly, pocketing the phone again. He pulled back on the road, taking a turn that will take them to the city.

"S-Sir?" Monami said. He glanced at her. "S-Sorry."

His eyebrows furrowed. "Sorry kyun?"

"M-Meri w-wajah se aap l-late ho r-rahe ho. Aa-Aap m-mujhe y-yahin ch-chodh do, m-main b-baaki ke r-raasta ch-chali jaungi", she said.

He rolled his eyes. "Do baatein", Karan said. She looked at him in surprise, immediately raising two fingers. "Pehli." She kept her middle finger down, holding the index finger up. "Main ghar jaa raha hoon. Late ho bhi gaya, koi tsunami nahi aa jaayegi."

"Aur d-doosri?" She prompted, raising the second finger again.

"Mere ghar waalon ko hamesha complaint rahegi, chaahe main kitna bhi pehle chala jaoon. Sunday ko dopehar mein jaata hoon toh kehte hain subah aana chahiye tha, subah jaata hoon toh kehte hain kal shaam ko hi jaata. Aur kabhi kabhi toh kehte yahin reh le." His lips curled up slightly.

"Must be nice", she muttered, probably to herself.

"Kya?" She shook her head. "Must be nice kya?" He pushed.

"M-Must be n-nice knowing ki k-koi hai jo aa-aapka itna b-besabri se i-intezaar k-kar raha hai, ki k-koi aapse i-itna py-pyaar karta hai." Her voice trailed into a softer, longing tone. His eyebrows furrowed.

"Tumhaare ghar par bhi toh koi tumhaara wait kar raha hoga."

She shook her head. She chuckled a little, uncharacteristic bitterness in the sound. "M-Mere Papa toh s-sirf yeh w-wait kar r-rahe hain ki m-main kab f-fail hongi. Kab aa-aakar yeh k-kahungi ki m-mujhse n-nahi hui yeh t-training." Her eyes welled up with tears.

Karan's grip tightened on the steering wheel. "Your Dad's in for a long, fruitless wait then", he said. "Tumhe naa main haar manne dunga, aur naa tumhe training chodhkar jaane dunga. Meri best cadet ho abhi. One of my best commandos banogi tum."

Her lips twitched up in a smile. "Th-Thank you", she whispered.

"Waise, apne Papa ko mention kara tumne, par Mumma ko nahi?" He asked. "Tumhaare Mumma support karte hain?"

Her smile dropped immediately, and she glanced down at her hands. "H-Hote toh z-zaroor k-karte", she said softly. She smiled a little. "Woh h-hain n-nahi ab. Sh-Shaheed ho g-gaye."

"Shaheed?" He asked in surprise. "Tumhaare Mumma defence mein the?"

She nodded. "A-Army d-doctor."

'Badi baap ki bighdi aulaad hogi yeh.'

'Outdoor adventure sports ke camp ki tarah treat karegi ise.'

'Wo ek spoiled, rich privileged kid hai jise lagta hai ki woh hum normal logon se bahut upar hai.'

He pressed down on the break, halting on the outskirts of the market. Monami smiled at him. "Th-Thank you."

"Monami", he stopped her. She looked back at him, her hand on the handle. "Woh..." He paused. "Main tumhe spoiled, privileged kid samajhta tha. I am sorry."

Her eyebrows furrowed, a small, confused smile tugging her lips up. "Aap al-already s-sorry b-bol chuke hain." She smiled. "It's a-all in the p-past n-now. M-Main bh-bhool g-gayi hoon, aap bhi bh-bhool jao. Thanks f-for the r-ride. Bye." She opened the door, hopping down. She waved at him and he lifted a hand back.

His fingers curled back down, and he gripped the steering wheel. He stared after her for a few seconds, watching her leave before he pressed down on the accelerator, turning to the direction of his house.

'Woh h-hain n-nahi ab. Sh-Shaheed ho g-gaye.'

'R-Rani woh j-jo apne l-logon, apni m-mitti k-ke liye apni jaan bh-bhi de sakti hai.'

'Rani w-woh jo apne d-desh ke liye j-jeeti ho, a-aur d-desh ke liye m-m-mar jaati ho.'

'Yeh kya apni maa ke baare mein baat kar rahi thi uss din?' He thought. 'Jaise baat kar rahi thi uss din, tab bhi lagaa tha ki jo isne kaha, iske liye woh kuchh mean karta hai. Apni maa ke baare mein baat kar rahi thi kya yeh?'

"Jitna tumhaare baare mein jaanun, Monami", he said aloud, "utna hi tumhaare baare mein sochne par majboor hota hoon. Tumhaari har baat mein aisi cheezen hoti hain, jo pehli baar mein naa main dekh paata hoon, naa sun paata hoon. Jo bahut, bahut baad mein samajh aati hain mujhe." His lips curled slightly. "Aisi kitni cheezen hain jo tumne mujhe already bataa di hain apne baare mein, par main dekh yaa sunn nahi paaya hoon?"

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

Monami stared at the white board. 'BALA'S BIRTHDAY PLANNING' was sprawled on the top in Koel's scribbly handwriting. She hadn't realized they were on a mission.

"Okay, everyone", Koel said seriously. "Our mission? Bala ka birthday achha banana hai."

"Ek baat bata", Sid said. "Tere andar Prem ji ki aatma aa gayi hai kya? Itna dramatic?" Koel threw the marker at him, and he caught it. His eyes lit up. "Marker jiske paas, captain woh."

"Mera marker hai woh", she snapped. "Waapas kar."

"Uh-uh", he said. "Ab tu baith, aur main plan karta hoon. Waise bhi, Bala mera roommate hai. By that logic, sabse zyaada haq mera banta hai uspar." He hopped to his feet, dodging Koel's swipe for the marker. She let out a frustrated groan, sitting down.

Monami chuckled slightly, hugging her knees as she sat on Sid's bed. The seven all had gathered in Sid and Bala's room, using their Sunday evening to plan a good enough birthday party for Bala.

"Okay, so sabse pehle, permission", Sid said. "Hume Karan Sir se permission leni hai. Preferably cake banaane ki, aur thoda junk food ki aur haan, rooms mein khaana laane ki. Uske baad hum apna plan of action decide karenge. Now, the big question. Kaun jaayega puchhne?"

There was a pause, as the cadets stared at each other.

"Bhai ji, main jaunga toh Karan Sir ji mere 'happy birthday' ke naam par mujhe hi mombatti ki tarah jalaa denge", Bala said. "Itna bhi yaadgaar nahi karna. Main nahi jaunga."

"#No way", Chitra said.

"Monami, tu chali jaa", Suman ji said.

Her eyes widened. "M-M-Main? Main k-kyun? Tum s-sab h-hamesha m-mere s-saath hi aisa k-kyun k-karte ho? Maine k-kya b-bigadha hai? L-Last time, t-tech ke liye p-puchhna tha, m-mujhe aa-aage kar diya. Aur ab bhi?"

"Kamini, pichhli baar toh tu chup chaap khadi thi mere saath", Sid said. "Bola toh maine tha. I went last time, toh main iss time nahi jaa raha."

"Par tujhe toh achhe lagte hain woh?" Prem ji said.

"Prem ji, I like him. It doesn't mean he likes me. Party ke liye puchhunga toh mujhpar hi bhadak jaayenge."

"I think Monami going is a good idea", Koel said. "I really think Karan Sir has a soft spot for her."

"Suman ji ko bhi yeh hi lagta hai", Suman ji said. "Yaad hai, jab tu locker room mein giri thi, toh Karan Sir khud tere saath rahe the jab tak tujhe hosh nahi aaya tha."

'Woh toh sirf isliye kyunki woh mujhse information chahte the', she thought. 'Par ab yeh toh nahi bol sakti. Kahan phas gayi hoon main? Phir, bomb ke paas pahuncha denge yeh log. Pichhli baar toh nahi phata, par party ke baare mein puchhungi, tab toh pakka seedha phatega bomb.'

"Bro, correct bol rahe hain", Sid said. "I think tu Karan Sir ki favourite hai. Agar tu puchhegi, toh sabse zyaada chance hai ki haan hogi." She looked at him, wide eyed. "Bro, Bala ka birthday tujhe special nahi manaana kya?"

She heaved a sigh. She nodded. "Par m-mood d-dekhkar. A-Abhi abhi m-maine unhe k-kisi ko d-daantte hue s-suna tha."

"Done", they echoed.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

"Hi", Faizi said.

Koel smiled at him, sitting down on the stairs. She glanced around. The stairs they met on was hidden in plain sight at the back of the academy, barely anyone passing through. It looked on at the gardens, leaving her relaxed every time she was there.

"Aaj toh tum sab cadets bahar gaye the, na?" Faizi asked. "Kaisa raha?"

She shrugged. "Bala ka birthday aa raha hai, aur usne kabhi apna birthday celebrate nahi kara. Toh hum sab uska birthday extra special plan kar rahe the, toh aaj sabne gifts liye uske liye aur phir idhar udhar ghoome, thode games khele, masti kari, junk food khaaya, and back to academy."

"Tumhaara kya plan hai birthday ka?"

"Monami Karan Sir se permission legi pehle. Phir, jitna woh allow karenge, uss hisaab se hum decide karenge."

His eyebrows furrowed. "Monami permission legi? Woh hi kyun?"

She shrugged. "Hume lagta hai Karan Sir has a soft spot for Monami. Woh unki favourite hai. Agar woh puchhegi, toh humaara chance haan milne ka zyaada hoga." Faizi's face broke into a grin. "Kya hua?"

He shook his head, chuckling. "Kuchh nahi."

She eyed him, before letting it go. "Main tumhaare liye kuchh laayi hoon."

"Humaare liye?" He asked in surprise.

She reached into her jacket pocket, producing the gift packed cologne. "Yeh lo", she said, holding it out. "Aapke liye gift."

He took it. "Is mein kya hai?" He asked.

"Kholkar dekho, na?"

Faizi ripped the paper off, smiling a little. He turned the bottle over, inspecting it. "Yeh kis liye?" He asked.

"Main kya tumhe aise hi gift nahi de sakti? Bala ke liye dekh rahi thi, toh yeh dikh gaya. Mujhe laga tumhe achha lagega."

"Bahut achha hai", he said. He leaned closer a little, and Koel's gaze dropped to his lips. They were inches from hers. Heat rose to her cheeks and her heartrate picked up. She closed her eyes as he leaned closer. His lips touched her cheek, pressing a soft kiss. "Shukriya", he whispered.

Her eyes opened as he pulled away. His lip curled into a slight smile, almost as if proud of the effect he had on her. She took a deep breath, glancing away. She jerked her head down in a nod.

The bell rang in a distance. "I should go", she said, standing up.

He stood up too, nodding. "Good night."

She turned around. She paused a little, turning back. She leaned up, pressing a kiss on his cheek. Faizi's eyes widened in surprise. She smiled slightly. "Good night." She turned around, running off.

Faizi shook his head a little. He chuckled to himself, a hand raising to his cheek where her lips had touched him. He turned the cologne over in his hand, his smile widening. He shoved his hands in his pockets, beginning to walk back.