Importance of saying 'No' - Page 10

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JayashreeR thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#91

Originally posted by: DaffodilsNew

Well I really hope she does.

Dts why I wrote in my post.....I hope Pallavi doesnt disappoint me.


But alas people took it in the wrong way.

you are not wrong in making this post I felt this is most needed post


pallavi should learn to say no.. I completely agree with u. 🤗


And yes I also hope Pallavi does not disappoint me..

JayashreeR thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#92

Originally posted by: nuomi.riceball

No, I don't think Pallavi considers Deshmukh as her mayka.

People will just say no directly, voicing their opinions without any preamble or fear of offending anybody in their mayka. What Pallavi is doing is being a very typical good bahu who will never say no to their mayka because that's what is expected from a typical community and society. To please their husband and their sasural in every way.

I never thought abt this point.. U are right she was never treated as daughter of the D house always she was treated as bahu...


And that's why she is not getting courage to say no.... But she took her stand when she reached her breaking point hopeful this time we get to see The bahu of Roas who is smart and give answers at straight face

WhtsinAname thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#93

Originally posted by: JayashreeR

you are not wrong in making this post I felt this is most needed post


pallavi should learn to say no.. I completely agree with u. 🤗


And yes I also hope Pallavi does not disappoint me..


Thank you so much for the support and understanding🤗


But the way people fought over this post.....made me feel really bad. I posted it and went to work . By the time I came back this had turned into a battleground. Made me wish to quit the forum for good.

nuomi.riceball thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#94

Originally posted by: JayashreeR

I never thought abt this point.. U are right she was never treated as daughter of the D house always she was treated as bahu...


And that's why she is not getting courage to say no.... But she took her stand when she reached her breaking point hopeful this time we get to see The bahu of Roas who is smart and give answers at straight face

I can't agree with you more! Nobody in the Deshmukh family except maybe for Sulochana and Milind (not sure whether this is going to be for the moment, or will always be that way), ever treated her as the daughter of the family rather than the daughter in law. This is most especially true when Sulochana told her to go back to her house, and Vijay said, "this is also her house".

Vijay only lets her stay in the house when he has some use of Pallavi. When Pallavi is no longer serving her purpose and stops contributing to the family then she is kicked directly without mercy whatsoever.

I even think that Pallavi acts more like daughter in the Rao house than she is in the Deshmukh house. She was not hesitant to punish Kirthi, even going as far as telling Jaya what she thought Kirthi had done to Mandhar.

Srijeeta06 thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#95

Originally posted by: nuomi.riceball

I can't agree with you more! Nobody in the Deshmukh family except maybe for Sulochana and Milind (not sure whether this is going to be for the moment, or will always be that way), ever treated her as the daughter of the family rather than the daughter in law. This is most especially true when Sulochana told her to go back to her house, and Vijay said, "this is also her house".

Vijay only lets her stay in the house when he has some use of Pallavi. When Pallavi is no longer serving her purpose and stops contributing to the family then she is kicked directly without mercy whatsoever.

I even think that Pallavi acts more like daughter in the Rao house than she is in the Deshmukh house. She was not hesitant to punish Kirthi, even going as far as telling Jaya what she thought Kirthi had done to Mandhar.

Pallavi experiences a lot of difference in Rao house because there she doesn’t have the feeling of obligation which she feels towards Deshmukh family

Rao family made place in her heart and mind gradually and with all the flaws.

She didn’t need to prove or act like a son of the house which was expected of her in Deshmukh house

She was free to take decisions and do everything with no barriers

That’s why she is strong when she is in Rao Mansion and with Rao family.

But in Deshmukh house it’s always her obligation that comes into play putting her dilemma of what is easy and what is more right because she feels obliged that being an orphan she got a family


Srijeeta06 thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#96

Originally posted by: DaffodilsNew

Well I really hope she does.

Dts why I wrote in my post.....I hope Pallavi doesnt disappoint me.


But alas people took it in the wrong way.

No

You didn’t do the mistake of posting this

There is a international best seller ‘The Art of saying ‘No’’

Not every body can put down their feet when required due to numerous reason

So this has been a quite sensible post I think

nuomi.riceball thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#97

Originally posted by: Srijeeta06

Pallavi experiences a lot of difference in Rao house because there she doesn’t have the feeling of obligation which she feels towards Deshmukh family

Rao family made place in her heart and mind gradually and with all the flaws.

She didn’t need to prove or act like a son of the house which was expected of her in Deshmukh house

She was free to take decisions and do everything with no barriers

That’s why she is strong when she is in Rao Mansion and with Rao family.

But in Deshmukh house it’s always her obligation that comes into play putting her dilemma of what is easy and what is more right because she feels obliged that being an orphan she got a family


That's why I said that she never considered the Deshmukh house as her maayka; she is acting like typical traditional Indian bahu to the Deshmukh house. In the Rao house, she is acting more like the daughter of the house or modern bahu of today's era.

WhtsinAname thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#98

Originally posted by: Srijeeta06

No

You didn’t do the mistake of posting this

There is a international best seller ‘The Art of saying ‘No’’

Not every body can put down their feet when required due to numerous reason

So this has been a quite sensible post I think


Thank you girl🤗


Didnt know abt the book. Will take a look.


But yeah der was this scene in a movie....it wasnt even serious but there the guy teaches the girl to say No....bcz its important and she has never been able to say it....due to numerous reasons like you said.

Jugnu21 thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago
#99

Originally posted by: Srijeeta06

Pallavi experiences a lot of difference in Rao house because there she doesn’t have the feeling of obligation which she feels towards Deshmukh family

Rao family made place in her heart and mind gradually and with all the flaws.

She didn’t need to prove or act like a son of the house which was expected of her in Deshmukh house

She was free to take decisions and do everything with no barriers

That’s why she is strong when she is in Rao Mansion and with Rao family.

But in Deshmukh house it’s always her obligation that comes into play putting her dilemma of what is easy and what is more right because she feels obliged that being an orphan she got a family

so true… but I feel whatever be the situation, she will never go back to D-fam… which raghav also iterated today… she had the opportunity once when VD thought Raghav’s has planned whole jewelry stealing case… that time also the flashback she had is of the day when she was thrown out in middle of the night on someone’s accusations…even same flashback came when Sharda pleaded her to stop her marriage with Raghav and come with her….

though she is not saying but I think she has never let go of that feeling she had when she was thrown out…and in future also I don’t think she will ever come back to trashmukhs but rather go to her brother’s house if need required…

She is in touch with her aai and kaka over phone post her declaration as PRR and went to trashmukhs only for things related to Mandar (his bday prayer, revealing his accident truth, return mandar, being called by d-fam and now by BWA) yeah she went for vat savitri pooja too.. but did not enter the house.. and stayed only for brief time…

may be I am wrong but I think she will never go back unless VD apologize to her and her husband which is not going to happen in near future…

Srijeeta06 thumbnail
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Posted: 4 years ago

Originally posted by: DaffodilsNew


Thank you girl🤗


Didnt know abt the book. Will take a look.


But yeah der was this scene in a movie....it wasnt even serious but there the guy teaches the girl to say No....bcz its important and she has never been able to say it....due to numerous reasons like you said.

Welcome 🤗


Which movie is it?

It’s important to be taught to say ‘no’ , politely but firmly when required.

And this really needs to be taught to everyone

But unfortunately it’s not done

Especially to a girl, because she has to go to ‘someone’s’ house

I put ‘someone’ in quotes because that someone eventually is supposed to become her everything and also her house till death do apart in usual cases

But still she is taught that she is supposed to maintain a certain decorum there which is at times beyond my understanding.

So yes it’s necessary and extremely important to know when to put down the feet and say ‘enough of it, I won’t do this’ or a simple ‘no’

Edited by Srijeeta06 - 4 years ago

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