Sense of touch or sense of belonging? - Page 2

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fatssrilanka thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago
#11

You have written so well. Yes, I too noticed it. Virat was guilt ridden, so he left the hand he was holding. And, when Sayi gave him permission he felt so good. And, when she left his hand once again he was disappointed. Virat can't stay away from Sayi and he longs to be close to her.

jane_austen thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago
#12

I think it was Sai who first glanced at her hand (for like half-second); Virat's gaze is consequently directed to the hand due to Sai's glance. So why did Sai glance at her hand in the first place?

laksh thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago
#13

Originally posted by: jane_austen

I think it was Sai who first glanced at her hand (for like half-second); Virat's gaze is consequently directed to the hand due to Sai's glance. So why did Sai glance at her hand in the first place?


If you mean before he took his hands away?


It is all new to her, she is noticing the change in their relationship as how he is now stopping her to thank her by holding her hand. She is rejoicing it but he misunderstood her glance.

Edited by laksh - 5 years ago
jane_austen thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago
#14

Originally posted by: laksh


If you nean before he took his hands away?


It is all new to her, she is noticing the change in their relationship as how he is now stopping her to thank her by holding her hand. She is rejoicing it but he misunderstood her glance.

Oh ok. Nice. I misunderstood her glance as coming from her own trauma of the incident.

janhav thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago
#15

Very beautifully described, @laksh... It is the most natural progression and the fact that they are able to tell the story of their growing love in such an organic manner is what really makes the show watchable (only if they could fix their execution)... I think as you and most of the others have said they are coming closer -- they are slowly moving from one level of intimacy to another. So, because they have established their emotional intimacy, the next step has to be physical intimacy. That is when you want the person to be in close proximity, spend as much time in each other's presence... It is easier for Virat to feel that way than Sai because he is the one who's more 'aware' of the changed condition between them. But Sai has begun getting comfortable with the touch, she is yet to decipher the message he's trying to convey.

Even within the physical intimacy, there are various stages -- first when you notice the person, then the eye contact and prolonged gazes, the effect of each other's voice, hand-holding (where they are), the next is when you might get comfortable putting the arm around the shoulder and so on😆... Frankly, I would like it to go slow (not by replacing their scenes with Kaku-Paku love story) because I can't discount the fact that she's only 19. She must be able to enjoy the experience and emotion first of falling in love.

Svt611 thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago
#16

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I'm glad this scene and the guilt was there! It was a very nice touch..

laksh thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago
#17

Originally posted by: jankiraghav

Very beautifully described, @laksh... It is the most natural progression and the fact that they are able to tell the story of their growing love in such an organic manner is what really makes the show watchable (only if they could fix their execution)... I think as you and most of the others have said they are coming closer -- they are slowly moving from one level of intimacy to another. So, because they have established their emotional intimacy, the next step has to be physical intimacy. That is when you want the person to be in close proximity, spend as much time in each other's presence

Exactly my thoughts and you have worded it so well and they are able to show it very well in this show.

... It is easier for Virat to feel that way than Sai because he is the one who's more 'aware' of the changed condition between them. But Sai has begun getting comfortable with the touch, she is yet to decipher the message he's trying to convey.

Very true

Even within the physical intimacy, there are various stages -- first when you notice the person, then the eye contact and prolonged gazes, the effect of each other's voice, hand-holding (where they are), the next is when you might get comfortable putting the arm around the shoulder and so on😆...

Yes, I completely agree, it happens in stages, I feel a slow transition makes it more meaningful, helps to form a bond.


Frankly, I would like it to go slow (not by replacing their scenes with Kaku-Paku love story) because I can't discount the fact that she's only 19. She must be able to enjoy the experience and emotion first of falling in love.

True, her age has to be factored in. I think in this matter, credit has to be given to Virat, he is a decent guy and very gentle and thoughtful too. Sai should first be able to comprehend these and only then she will be able to enjoy the experience.



Beautifully written.


Have replied in green font.

Edited by laksh - 5 years ago
janhav thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago
#18

Originally posted by: laksh

Yes, I completely agree, it happens in stages, I feel a slow transition makes it more meaningful, helps to form a bond.

When you cohabit with a person, the romance is basically in the fact of being in each other's presence. Romance is construed as "physical touch" but the literal meaning of romance is the feeling you feel when you are with that person who is your love-interest, beyond friendship and almost all other descriptions that can be used to define that relationship.

True, her age has to be factored in. I think in this matter, credit has to be given to Virat, he is a decent guy and very gentle and thoughtful too. Sai should first be able to comprehend these and only then she will be able to enjoy the experience.

He also knows that she's a victim of sexual harassment and the fact that she's hesitating because of the misunderstanding between them. At least he has understood that she has 'misunderstood' his feeling for Vahini but he has not understood that he needs to do the spashth talking Jo ladki video call par haath dekhna hai sunke sirf hand show karegi, wo spashthly conditons have changed sune bina 'romance' kaise feel karegi. Someone tell this man 😆

But yes, he's definitely someone she trusts in this matter since the first day. Otherwise, she wouldn't have agreed to share the bed with him. And it is his patience and his perseverance that will eventually also help her realise that she can actually break her walls and fall in love.

Ekaanek100 thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago
#19

Originally posted by: laksh

Held her hand, then left it because he was reminded of his actions and his mistake.

She places her hand on his hand tells him that he can hold it for such reasons.

But what was the next thing? She takes her hand from his hands to carry on with her work and he was diappointed? He looks at her hand that was removed from his.

That scene was so cute. Didn't like the loss of touch, if he was not feeling guilty a minute before he might have even asked arey haath kyun chudvaaya.


I am reminded of the scene when Sai says she will eat the food on her own and he gets disappointed. She asks him to stop feeding her and he was like looks like you didn't hear me, I told you that I will feed you. And when she said you need to have your food too and you might also faint and I can't take care of you, he didn't know what to do.

So the next plan, started his nautanki.

No one cares about my food, aai bhi mujhe khilathi nahi hai and all and the way she catches his intentions. Seedhe seedhe boliye na mere haath se khaana hai.


Sense of touch, how significant is it? Virat is in a stage where he doesn't like the loss of contact, she has just started to get used to the touch and he is already in the stage of not able to tolerate the loss of contact.


Loss of touch or her not showing interest in staying close or their proximity has started to disappoint him, his insecurity starts to creep in slowly.

The touch gives him not just the pleasure but a feeling that she is his, makes him feel that he has rights on her, will be with him, gives him the sense of belonging.


Any noticed? Feel this way?

Virat like i said in one of your posts the other day is actually extremely attached to Sai.. He is emotionally dependent on her..He craves for things like having dinner with her..Since he reaches home late at night mostly , I assume he doesnt have dinner with his family. But since Sai has been his wife he really wants her to

wait for him so that they could have dinner together..and expectation he has not have had with anyone in the family and a habit he denied Pakhi to follow. He craves for moments with Sai. That could be anything.. dinner.. sitting and talking.. going out or for that matter even fighting. If you look at his dialogues when he apologizes to Pakhi/family for anything Sai has done he always apologizes on behalf of her with a certain degree of right he feels he has as Sai's husband. He considers himself and Sai to be in the same team. He thanks Pakhi for coming back and denies thanking Sai saying usko kyu bolun thanks.. Not because she doesnt not deserve it but because we both are same..bolo na bolo ek hi baat hai... When he thinks Sai would be hungry he doesnt eat as well... not because he wants to punish himself for his family's behaviour but because it doesnt comes from within.. He is attuned to Sai.. Sai has started mattering to him beyond any limit.

Now Now we have seen Virat time and again mentioning to Sai how she doesnt consider him anything.. He has a hunger to listen being called a family..or a friend if not pati.. Initially he would not tread into mentioning the word Pati...and would limit his wishes to being called a family or a friend... recently in frustration he did say tum toh mujhe dost nahi maanti...pati toh dur ki baat.. That was a weak moment where came out with what he considers himself to be. His apology went with asking her to call him her family..her parivar.. because deep down he remembers that she said she has no one to call her own..ab bhi toh akeli hi hun.. He respects her comfort zone..he also accepts that she doesnt like him..so he doesnt go with main pati hun tumhara.. But he wants to feel that belonging.. He wants Sai to belong to him and he knows he belongs to Sai. Sai has hardly let her guard down has far as her feelings are concerned and Virat is almost at brink of losing it all.. He is overwhelmed with his emotions for Sai.. And the fact that he doesnt know its love..because of his delusional definition of love.. those emotions are taking a toll on him

Now coming to him being possessive and insecure.. Virat has been shown to be possessive at places where there was no need for the same.. I mean even in Amey's case he knew she was not flirting but acting.. yet his actions screamed anger ..It felt like he would destroy things around him..He could not deal with those words coming out for his Sai for someone else.. And then the whole Aniket's issue..the way his eyes darkened when she mentioned Aniket happily was again something that made me think what is the big deal.. Sai was talking about Aniket not in an appreciative way but genuinely someone who she thought was talented.. From Sai's point of view it looked all normal..Also I believe Aai seemed more sorted and accepted about guy friends when she asked kis ladke ne diya sai.. SHe was not admonishing her bahu but just asked her in a normal way.. Virat goes extreme when it comes about guys in Sai's life..who have had minimal existence till date.. Did he not think or does he not think she wont have any friends in college at all.. Or considering the deal does he not expect her to fall in love.. Or probably he does and thats what brings out the extreme jealousy and insecurity.. One feels insecure when the other person has not assured you about your position in her/his life. There is no assurance from Sai's side. She has not even on her called him family..pati toh dur ki baat.. Virat fears rejection...fears her aloofness.. He is vulnerable now..extremely vulnerable hopelessly in love and since he doesnt know its love.. it increases the degree of hopelessness.. He right now is at a position where he keeps on clinging to her..without any reciprocation from her side. He needs assurance from her.. assurance that also allows him to touch her.. She has said few times appko haq nahi banta chune ka.. ya aapne mujhe kyu chua.. she insists on maintaining distance,,is not okay with friendly touches as well at times.. All this is nothing but rejection.. He considers Sai as his wife and wants to feel a belonging . With so much love to give and getting not much in return has also made him a bit needy.. The want to be called hers..and to call her ..his.. is exponentially increasing and hence any kind of distance emotional or physical makes him agitated..

I am not sure what would be the case if by any chance Jagtap comes back and even lays a finger on Sai.. Also special mention to the streak we also saw in the look he gave to that bike wala during that outing..He was angry.

PS: Neil's portrayal when he is jealous is mindblowing..Just for that portrayal of his I would want to see a small track..I was disappointed when Aniket's track was removed suddenly.

Your views on his possessiveness and insecurity are welcome

fatssrilanka thumbnail
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Posted: 5 years ago
#20

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

Virat like i said in one of your posts the other day is actually extremely attached to Sai.. He is emotionally dependent on her..He craves for things like having dinner with her..Since he reaches home late at night mostly , I assume he doesnt have dinner with his family. But since Sai has been his wife he really wants her to

wait for him so that they could have dinner together..and expectation he has not have had with anyone in the family and a habit he denied Pakhi to follow. He craves for moments with Sai. That could be anything.. dinner.. sitting and talking.. going out or for that matter even fighting. If you look at his dialogues when he apologizes to Pakhi/family for anything Sai has done he always apologizes on behalf of her with a certain degree of right he feels he has as Sai's husband. He considers himself and Sai to be in the same team. He thanks Pakhi for coming back and denies thanking Sai saying usko kyu bolun thanks.. Not because she doesnt not deserve it but because we both are same..bolo na bolo ek hi baat hai... When he thinks Sai would be hungry he doesnt eat as well... not because he wants to punish himself for his family's behaviour but because it doesnt comes from within.. He is attuned to Sai.. Sai has started mattering to him beyond any limit.

Now Now we have seen Virat time and again mentioning to Sai how she doesnt consider him anything.. He has a hunger to listen being called a family..or a friend if not pati.. Initially he would not tread into mentioning the word Pati...and would limit his wishes to being called a family or a friend... recently in frustration he did say tum toh mujhe dost nahi maanti...pati toh dur ki baat.. That was a weak moment where came out with what he considers himself to be. His apology went with asking her to call him her family..her parivar.. because deep down he remembers that she said she has no one to call her own..ab bhi toh akeli hi hun.. He respects her comfort zone..he also accepts that she doesnt like him..so he doesnt go with main pati hun tumhara.. But he wants to feel that belonging.. He wants Sai to belong to him and he knows he belongs to Sai. Sai has hardly let her guard down has far as her feelings are concerned and Virat is almost at brink of losing it all.. He is overwhelmed with his emotions for Sai.. And the fact that he doesnt know its love..because of his delusional definition of love.. those emotions are taking a toll on him

Now coming to him being possessive and insecure.. Virat has been shown to be possessive at places where there was no need for the same.. I mean even in Amey's case he knew she was not flirting but acting.. yet his actions screamed anger ..It felt like he would destroy things around him..He could not deal with those words coming out for his Sai for someone else.. And then the whole Aniket's issue..the way his eyes darkened when she mentioned Aniket happily was again something that made me think what is the big deal.. Sai was talking about Aniket not in an appreciative way but genuinely someone who she thought was talented.. From Sai's point of view it looked all normal..Also I believe Aai seemed more sorted and accepted about guy friends when she asked kis ladke ne diya sai.. SHe was not admonishing her bahu but just asked her in a normal way.. Virat goes extreme when it comes about guys in Sai's life..who have had minimal existence till date.. Did he not think or does he not think she wont have any friends in college at all.. Or considering the deal does he not expect her to fall in love.. Or probably he does and thats what brings out the extreme jealousy and insecurity.. One feels insecure when the other person has not assured you about your position in her/his life. There is no assurance from Sai's side. She has not even on her called him family..pati toh dur ki baat.. Virat fears rejection...fears her aloofness.. He is vulnerable now..extremely vulnerable hopelessly in love and since he doesnt know its love.. it increases the degree of hopelessness.. He right now is at a position where he keeps on clinging to her..without any reciprocation from her side. He needs assurance from her.. assurance that also allows him to touch her.. She has said few times appko haq nahi banta chune ka.. ya aapne mujhe kyu chua.. she insists on maintaining distance,,is not okay with friendly touches as well at times.. All this is nothing but rejection.. He considers Sai as his wife and wants to feel a belonging . With so much love to give and getting not much in return has also made him a bit needy.. The want to be called hers..and to call her ..his.. is exponentially increasing and hence any kind of distance emotional or physical makes him agitated..

I am not sure what would be the case if by any chance Jagtap comes back and even lays a finger on Sai.. Also special mention to the streak we also saw in the look he gave to that bike wala during that outing..He was angry.

PS: Neil's portrayal when he is jealous is mindblowing..Just for that portrayal of his I would want to see a small track..I was disappointed when Aniket's track was removed suddenly.

Your views on his possessiveness and insecurity are welcome

Wow! Your post is splendid. Agree with everything that you have mentioned. Virat wants Sayi to reciprocate his love and when she's keeping a distance he feels agitated. He wants her to be close to him and wants her to understand his feelings. He hates when she talks about another guy because he feels insecure which is normal regarding the situation in which they married. In the beginning this marriage was a deal and so both of them had promised not to expect anything from each other. But, now the same responsibility is slowly progressing into love which Virat has begun to realise but Sayi has yet to realise.

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