Rani still does not get it? - Page 4

Originally posted by: regnow

Change doesn't happen because society actually does not give a crap. They think it's something for police to handle and changing the law is the solution. They won't look at society's problems and why women are so disrespected in India because they have nothing to gain from it.

It starts from birth itself. The sex ratio is so skewed in India because girls are aborted. Once they're born, there are celebrations if a boy is born and worries if a girl is born. A lot of parents are not bothered about educating their girls because society has deemed it that girls have get married and leave and go take care of the husband's family. They see no point in investing in daughters because they benefit their husband's family only. Joint family culture is almost always dismissive of women in subtle ways too. They are there to cook and clean and take care of elders. They're taught to sacrifice because they are not that important and other people's happiness is matters more.

In general, women are just not valued that much so men think they can do whatever they want. They've seen it all their lives.

I agree with all that on papers...absolutely good points....Sadly...never going to happen.....since I see zero changes hapening after Nirbhaya case...so I am asking for practical suggestions......theorey mein I also have a ton of suggestions...nothing will work though.

Originally posted by: blue-ice.1

you have better suggestions?? I want to listen to the suggestions given by those bashing Rani.

There are no good short-term solutions. All you can do is be aware of your surroundings. Always let someone know where you're going and what time you expect to be back. Make sure your family knows what bus you're taking or what route you're using or use the safety features services like Uber have. But none of that will prevent anything if you're unlucky.

But long term, Indian society does need to change. Force kids to take gender studies classes, make it a requirement to go through training (anti-harassment, etc.) the way workplaces do, teach what is right and wrong in terms of behavior... parents are useless and won't do anything but the state can take over and mandate that these things happen in school. Bad people will always exist but getting them when they're young will lessen it.

Originally posted by: regnow

There are no good short-term solutions. All you can do is be aware of your surroundings. Always let someone know where you're going and what time you expect to be back. Make sure your family knows what bus you're taking or what route you're using or use the safety features services like Uber have. But none of that will prevent anything if you're unlucky.

But long term, Indian society does need to change. Force kids to take gender studies classes, make it a requirement to go through training (anti-harassment, etc.) the way workplaces do, teach what is right and wrong in terms of behavior... parents are useless and won't do anything but the state can take over and mandate that these things happen in school. Bad people will always exist but getting them when they're young will lessen it.

@ bold...very good suggestions 👍🏼

Long term wali toh chalti rahegi.....its like the gun violence in USA...after every incident there are days and days worth of discussion, debates, blame games and then its back to the same old same old....nothing happens......where as in gun violence there hardly anything we can do to protect ourselves but in rape cases...atleast SOME will be saved if they are following ur suggestions or learning self defense....not all...but may be some..and that is something.

Didn’t Rani say in one of these interviews that it’s the woman’s responsibility to defend herself? That is an extremely problematic statement to make. And it does put the onus of it on the victim. So no, she’s not just advocating for self defense as a means of defending oneself and lessening the dangers. She’s declaring women’s self defense as the solution to the problem of rape.

Originally posted by: IAmLuvBolly

Didn’t Rani say in one of these interviews that it’s the woman’s responsibility to defend herself? That is an extremely problematic statement to make. And it does put the onus of it on the victim. So no, she’s not just advocating for self defense as a means of defending oneself and lessening the dangers. She’s declaring women’s self defense as the solution to the problem of rape.

Last year round table she said in so many words that its the onus of the woman to not be a victim of the me too because in her long career she has never been a victim of such a thing only because of the way she conducted herself and didn’t let the men take advantage of he....If that is not a problematic statement, I don’t know what is!

Originally posted by: IAmLuvBolly

Didn’t Rani say in one of these interviews that it’s the woman’s responsibility to defend herself? That is an extremely problematic statement to make. And it does put the onus of it on the victim. So no, she’s not just advocating for self defense as a means of defending oneself and lessening the dangers. She’s declaring women’s self defense as the solution to the problem of rape.

Like I said ...in theory...Rani is absolutely wrong.....In theory we all should be able to roam around in the middle of the night and be safe...in theory I should be able to leave my house open and not have it robbed...In theory I should be able to not lock my car and yet it shouldn't be stolen..In theory if I drop my wallet...no one should abuse my credit card....but does that happen.....and even when we take care of our homes, cars, credit cards....still they can be robbed, stolen and misused right......will u depend on the state and society and authorities to take care of ur property?? Nahi na.....then why is it not important to apply the same thing to ur ownself when its the most important thing of all....once a girl gets raped and killed...will she come back....then why is it wrong to do whatever we can do to safeguard ourselves...

I don't think any sane person would ever put the blame on the girl for getting raped...its always the rapist who is at fault....but how is that saving the girl....maybe self defense and other precautionary measures can save the girl..

Humare desh mein Mandir ke liye toh decision le liya gaya....but no justice for Nirbhaya....that is the messed up state of things we live in....and that is perspective that people like Rani have when they say what they say.

Originally posted by: cricketfan1

Arre Anjs, it goes without saying that we women need to first look into ourselves for help...Every humanbeing needs to...But here the problem is bigger than that...These lessons are being given since times immemorial but hua kuch nahi....More and more people have to talk about how the society has to change and shame it for the current state, then there may be some collective change....I don’t know what she is saying now, but in the last year’s round table she literally said that she blames the women for letting the me too happen to them...😳

Yea, even i didn't like her thoughts in last year's interview...

But this situation is different.... We all spoke up so much when nirbhaya case happened, but what after that, similar or worse cases kept happening..... There are parents who still defend their rapist sons, finding loopholes in the law and demanding juvenile court for them..... 2 out of the 4 people who helped unnao case accused in murdering the victim were Trivedi.....my assumption is that they might be family....

So when society is not changing, at least we need to adapt.... If self defence helps even 1 out of 100 cases, then it is beneficial, right ?

Yea, it's govt's job to protect us and make strict laws to stop such crime from happening and we should very much hold them accountable but in the meanwhile it won't harm to be a little more alert, a little more self+sufficient about our own safety....

this self-defense won't help us handle situations of gang rape but it will at least help us in situation where there is a single rapist....

Originally posted by: blue-ice.1

I kow...ki theory mein bahut achha lagta hai...society change karo...raise better boys..and blah blah.....and that is never going to happen.....so let us keep living in our Lala Land till then and bash anyone who is coming up with a practical solution....

There was a lot noise made when those rapists were shot down by the cops...ki kyon maara...we live in a civilzed society....kaun se civilized society Bhaiyaa...wahin jahan ladkiyon ko torture aur rape karke..they are burned alive.....is this a civilized world we are talking about??and this is te civilized world that we live where people giving good advice like girls should learn self defense should be bashed/....just because it doesn't match their theory of a perfect world existing somewhere..

We can raise better boys at the same time we can ask our girls to learn self defense for their own good ..what’s wrong in saying that to girls is beyond me....it’s not that exhausting for girls ..and no need for kick boxing and lifting the men....it’s some simple techniques with practical mind...if this protects u against evils why not ?changing society is not in our hands but protecting ourself is def we can do ..

Originally posted by: blue-ice.1

Like I said ...in theory...Rani is absolutely wrong.....In theory we all should be able to roam around in the middle of the night and be safe...in theory I should be able to leave my house open and not have it robbed...In theory I should be able to not lock my car and yet it shouldn't be stolen..In theory if I drop my wallet...no one should abuse my credit card....but does that happen.....and even when we take care of our homes, cars, credit cards....still they can be robbed, stolen and misused right......will u depend on the state and society and authorities to take care of ur property?? Nahi na.....then why is it not important to apply the same thing to ur ownself when its the most important thing of all....once a girl gets raped and killed...will she come back....then why is it wrong to do whatever we can do to safeguard ourselves...

I don't think any sane person would ever put the blame on the girl for getting raped...its always the rapist who is at fault....but how is that saving the girl....maybe self defense and other precautionary measures can save the girl..

Humare desh mein Mandir ke liye toh decision le liya gaya....but no justice for Nirbhaya....that is the messed up state of things we live in....and that is perspective that people like Rani have when they say what they say.

But that’s exactly what Rani is doing. By saying it’s the woman’s responsibility to not become a victim she’s putting the blame on the woman.

BI, you are doing exactly what you told AM not to do in the Sanjay/Kriti topic. You are making excuses for Rani. She’s victim blaming because she has an accused rapist in her family and doesn’t want to deal with the reality of that.

Originally posted by: IAmLuvBolly

What’s really disturbing here is that she’s raising another future woman.

what’s disturbing ? May be she is raising her girl teaching self defense...? I don’t see any disturbing in what she said to learn self defense for ones own good....