Chap 14 on Pg 136 Entrapment : An Extremely Dark Advni FF - Page 23

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2filmy thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Trailblazer Thumbnail Commentator Level 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
ok here she made a mistake
he never allowed anyone else to take control in his matters and he hated if anyone spoiled his plans
next she took his name which he hadn't allowed her
I think this is completely a dominant thing right
or maybe he hates that he had to change his name for her so he hates if the cause of his name change takes his name without his permission
suddenly he changed and was the opposite of the person she had seen till now
I think here she got an idea how bipolar he can be
he is happy with her submission now and wants her to address as she would her husband
she was shocked at his confidence and he challenged her as Indrani was forcing her to marry PP
Chandni put up a weak defense for Indrani but Advay dismissed it easily
2filmy thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Trailblazer Thumbnail Commentator Level 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
he challenged her if she will marry him if her mom asked her to and she answered defiantly
I agree with him here he isn't like Indrani he won't force her to marry him he will wait till she marries him willingly of course he will manipulate situations and matters and leave her with no other option but that's a different thing altogether
of course he knows that she will agree to marry him
I loved how u put all his thoughts every memory came back to haunt him he missed his family badly the house brought them back vividly
I loved that he asked if she ate before eating
wow so Murli went from Didi to bhabhi of course he knows they will marry
hmm so one of the reasons he wants to marry her is as it was his mother's wish that's interesting
the elders had decided it and he knew that
also he loves her and she had loved him too
2filmy thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Trailblazer Thumbnail Commentator Level 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
of course if things were normal his parents would be alive AdNi would be married with children
I understand the depth of the betrayal he felt with her words and actions
he deserved to get everything in life and was supposed to be the next Mahant but for her lie everything changed and now he had nothing
Chandni came to offer him kheer how sweet of her
he tried to soothe the pain he had given her earlier
but he gave her a warning to not mess with him and always obey him she nodded in agreement
he was clearly getting aroused as she was so close and he was drunk
she wanted to leave but he held her hand and tasted the kheer and appreciated it I loved that he asked her if she has eaten
2filmy thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Trailblazer Thumbnail Commentator Level 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
poor Chandni I understand all this was just too much for her so she ran away to her room
he was really messing with her brain
she found him familiar yet she didn't know him
she felt an instant connect with him but didn't know why
she was so confused at her own reaction to him
she had hoped for Dev to come back but he never came
also she couldn't understand Advay at all
one minute he was so careful and cheerful the next minute he is all angry and dark
he seemed to know her well that baffled her more
Illuminatus. thumbnail
11th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 8 years ago
OMG! See how fast I came back to check on you. πŸ˜‰
Fabulous chapter... evry interaction between Advay and Chandni edges on being erotic. I loved how Advay dipped her finger in to the Kheer and sucked it.

Advay is dark and with a purpose. I am eager to read everyday. 😊
2filmy thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Trailblazer Thumbnail Commentator Level 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
by the way the way he had the kheer was so suggestive but I am sure Chandni didn't understand it
but why did she run away
ChitraGS thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Dazzler Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago

Originally posted by: 2filmy

by the way the way he had the kheer was so suggestive but I am sure Chandni didn't understand it
but why did she run away


OMG priya, what would u do if a man you have jsut met starts sucking ur fingers πŸ˜†πŸ˜†
it a surprise she hasn't slapped him yet
Mangothyme thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Navigator Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
Hi Chitra,
I have so many feelings after I read this chapter, they are all over the place so forgive the randomness. You are such a good writer and pay such attention to detail it surprisingly brought back a rush of memories for me, not just Advay.

That scene on the terrace with the Mahant's antique easy chair and him chanting hymns, Advay sitting at his feet doing homework, combined with Advay having dinner reminded me of my grandfather. Whenever we visited India as kids, grandfather would be sitting on a terrace in his easy chair, while we sat at his feet as he taught us to write the local language. He would sing Carnatic hymns and drink filter coffee while eating some snack. There was no gushing Ganges but the roar of traffic in the distance, but this scene you wrote took me straight to one of my cherished childhood memories. Thank you so much. I can't thank you enough for that.

It is the little details like those that make you are great writer. I absolutely love your Chandini. I could never connect with the serial Chandini because on one hand she is wearing the most modern sari drapes showing her navel with a stranger in the house but she cannot work ? There were so many jarring discrepancies in the serial Chandini, but not your Chandini. I love how she covered her toes with her sari. The modesty that I imagined that was so much part of a Mahant daughter is there. She not working despite highly educated works for me. What I love about your story is I don't have to make leaps of logic to justify things or make an excuse of it is a desi soap it is not supposed to make sense. It just flows. Thank you so much for the attention to detail you pay. It is such a pleasure to read.

Chandini and BDSM in this story will not be out of place. Sanskaari and sensual can go hand in hand if written with care and respect like you do. Looking forward greatly to read about the Mahaarti and the opening of the treasure. Thank you once again. If you ever decide to publish this, I will definitely buy it. You are that good and I mean it sincerely.
2filmy thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Trailblazer Thumbnail Commentator Level 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago

Originally posted by: ChitraGS



OMG priya, what would u do if a man you have jsut met starts sucking ur fingersπŸ˜†πŸ˜†
it a surprise she hasn't slapped him yet


she really finds him so intense and attractive na ?
I would have been intimidated too
2filmy thumbnail
8th Anniversary Thumbnail Trailblazer Thumbnail Commentator Level 2 Thumbnail
Posted: 8 years ago
ok just have to clarify a few things
I hope the door doesn't open on the day of Maha Aarti
does Meghna here have a child who's growing in the orphanage ?
will PP be as creepy as in the show
how did Advay suddenly remember his mother's last wish amid his revenge
once he married her he can't abandon her so how will he take his revenge then
may be he will slowly isolate her from her family as sh had done to him long back

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