Thank you, for all those who liked and commented. Here's the prologue and I look forward to hear what you felt about it.
Prologue
November, 2010
It wasn't easy. It never was, to overcome the numbness that engulfed her, to shrug off the chillness of its bitter claws as it scarred the heart, each stroke running deeper than the previous one, picking up her splintered dreams in its folds while she struggled to free herself from the invisible chains immobilizing her with its steely grip. The usual calmness that had been her strength in these eighteen odd years of her life as she was forced to act upon her parents' decision was nowhere in reach as her chest heaved with punctured breaths.
A sense of frightening, hysterical laugh bubbled up her throat while her eyes strayed around, the eerie silence in the room with its pale walls rounding in on her like the mist on the outside as skies darkened up. The neatly organized, monochromatic room scoffed at her as she swallowed a hard sob. The uncertainty stumbled her backwards, snatching the blanket of familiarity in her own room that she had spent all her life. Her eyes wide in her face as she stared at the pale reflection in the mirror, tears blurring her vision, lips parted in an effort to fight off the bubbling sob while water puddled down at her feet from her drenched saree.
How had it come to this?
Wasn't it just that morning that she had finally managed to convince her mother to talk to her father about her higher education, after three tormented months of battling?
She had been happy. Thrilled that in few years she would be one of those few residing in Laxmi Nagar Chawl who graduated with a bachelor's degree. She would turn her dreams into reality. She would then not only help her father with their small but profitable sweet shop but also take their business into higher levels. Her mother had laughed at her craziness but she was determined, to do her best in order to provide a better living for the family.
Yet, here she was, few hours later, lost in the world of harsh realities where goals were considered as fantasies, something beyond their reach. Lost and suffocated in her own house while the family busied themselves looking after the preparations to bid adieu to their youngest daughter. Unwanted and unwelcomed daughter, a distinct voice alien to her own ears snapped from somewhere within as she continued staring at her reflection, at the parting filled with red powder, the sudden downpour smudging it, leaving traces of melted powder along the bridge of her nose.
The sudden gust of air howled at her as the door swayed open, followed by the sharp click of lock. She shut her eyes painfully at the presence of the person who had all but been familiar throughout her life. Her mouth curved into a bitter, loathing smile at the irony of her situation. She had known him, watched him growing up in front of her, from a silly, boy-next-door who bullied her at every given opportunity to a soft-spoken, supportive teenager and ended up being a good friend. In the darkest hours where her life scrambled up with a pile of carelessly thrown glares and words from her family and neighbors alike, he had been that ray of hope, reaching out to her and being that lending hand. But that moment was long gone. They had snatched the only friend she thought she finally had, as ruthlessly as always.
"I can't accept you as my wife."
She shut her eyes, her fists gripping the sides of her saree as the words greeted her, each word twisting the knife in her bleeding heart in that cut to the point tone she had admired as a kid. Her whole life, she had been unwanted and unwelcomed. Born as third daughter in row when all they wanted was a son, a helpless girl who never understood the difference between reality and fantasy and now, a wife unaccepted by her husband of three hours.
"Let's pretend for as long as Amma is fine." Her... husband stated nonchalantly, not bothering to look at her as he continued. "I don't want to risk her health and I'm sure you don't have a problem. In fact, you'll be too happy to be away from Chawl, don't you?"
Her head snapped with a sharp intake of breath, too shocked to respond to the man who was glaring at her as if... "you think I planned this?" She snapped back, losing her control at the accusations of doing something she had never done. "That I married you because I want to leave?"
"Ah, don't pretend, alright." He sneered. "You always wanted to have a better living. And you snatched the first opportunity and jumped in to marry me. Come on, stop being an innocent girl when you're clearly not."
How in the name of lord she wished to clear her name in the mess and prove her innocence? Just because she wanted to have a life didn't mean she would do anything for having one. Who else, better than the man standing in front of her as her husband, knew the burning passion to leave where they had been residents since they were toddlers inside her, waiting for the right opportunity to embark in a journey that would lead her to the destination?
Yet, he was being one of those dim-witted, gossiping crowds calling themselves as Chawl's socialites.
Or, did he not remember that it was his mother who asked him to marry her? That it was his family approaching hers? That, every decision in her life was not taken by her but her family, against her will, leaving her with no choice but to compel.
If this was what her family believed, she thought vigorously, that she would go to any extent to shape herself as a better person, if this was what her husband think of her, then there was no point in arguing and trying to prove herself otherwise.
She would as well live up to it, with as much grace as she could muster.
"Let's pretend for as long as your Amma is fine, but in return, I'd like you to talk to my Baba about my studies."
Khushi Kumari Gupta stared at her husband, her steely gaze held high as she refused to lower her head and let others rule her life. Enough was enough, a small voice whispered as she wiped tears off her face.
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