If there was something Arnav Singh Raizada despised the most in his life,the one thing he could never bear,the one thing that held the power to enforce extreme reactions from him were tears in his Khushi's eyes.
The first time he has seen those hazel orbs glistening with unshed tears,it has evoked a strange emotion inside him.The emotion he was well versed with now.Even when they claimed to hate each other,her tears bothered him,troubled him,piercing his heart into pieces.
The dreaded night at the guesthouse after the heated war of words between them,she has ended up fainting in his arms.One moment she has been lashing out at him like a tigress and the other she has been in his arms.
It had been the first time he had seen her so vulnerable,the lone tear he has wiped off that has escaped her eye lids.The indecipherable feeling that has kicked inside him ,he had wanted to carry off her at someplace where he could keep her safe and no harm could make its way to her.
The moment she has sunconsciously held onto him prohibiting him from going away from her.Only he knew how much of courage he had to muster to leave her that day.Unknowingly his heart has embarked on the journey to be there for her always.
There has been misconceptions,they have clashed at every given point of time,a wall of misunderstandings has hung between them but if there was one thing that has remained constant in their whole journey was the innate need to protect her.It wasn't the responsibility that he felt towards his sister or family.It was far more intense,it was a need essential for his own existence.
Her tears bothered him,troubled him,piercing his heart into thousand pieces.He wasn't averse that initially it had been him who had driven her to tears many a times but every tear she cried has ended up hurting him more than her.Hasn't this been the very reason he had tried every tactic to drive her away but in the inner recesses of her heart,Khushi had been privy to this truth of his.
He had broken all his rules when it came to her and she has ended up breaking down every wall,making her way to his heart only to become the sole possessor of it and her happiness held the key to his.But Tonight was perhaps the first and he would make sure the last time where he wanted her to cry.To shed tears of grief and let him ebb away every inch of pain from her heart.He wanted to take it all away ,feel it instead of her.
As she lay still in his arms listening to his heartbeats,Arnav realised it was a deep rooted pain that has come forth again.She was avoiding eye contact with him lest he reads the reason of turmoil in her eyes.But who was she fooling?.
Arnav glanced at the time,it was half past 12.Shaking her up lightly he whispered lovingly as one does to a child.
"Khushi,get up,you need to eat".
in her response Khushi tightened her hold on him incessantly shaking her head in denial.Sighing,Arnav used the tactic that would never falter as he deliberately stated.
"Fine if you won't then I won't either and you know that I can't take medicines without eating".
His lips on its own curved into a smile as she sat up upright immediately.Comewhat may she will never let anything come in way of his wellbeing.He was warming up the food when he saw the bowl kept in the corner away from all the dishes and Mr Raizada knew exactly what to do.
Khushi was at the poolside gazing at the stars.She didn't said a word as Arnav took turns to fed her and himself.She ate without any fuss when all off a sudden,Arnav choked up on food coughing badly,having all the attention of Khushi at once.
She patted his back as her voice grew notche higher due to budding anger at his carelessness.
"Are you insane.This is so spicy,Can't you do one thing correct without my help".
Arnav looked up amused at her remark as she handed him the water and rushed towards the kitchen.Khushi came back panting for breath before putting a morseful of lemon pudding in his mouth.He relished the taste of the pudding making her realise that she has been yet again fooled by her husband.
She pushed him away only for him to bring her closer and finish their errand of eating with Arnav engaging her in conversations one after the other,not letting her think about anything else till her eyes dropped in the dire need of sleep.
Driving towards AR next morning,his hold on the steering wheel tightened,his knuckles turning white with the pressure.Khushi had told him that she wanted to spend the day at the orphanage.Each day they would drove together to their respective offices and today he missed her presence around her,her lively chattering,her infectious laughter,engulfed with which,no journey ever seemed long to him.
He wasn't angry,he knew what she was doing.She was pushing him away,not wanting to be in close proximities with him lest the strong shield she has put on breaks down.With a quick call to Aman to reschedule all his meetings for the day,Arnav turned around the wheels of his car towards "AASHIYAAN".
Khushi sat beneath the tree watching the children play merrily.How innocent was childhood untouched from all the worries and manipulations of life.The carefree attitude,these children didn't knew what lay beyond these four walls the place,they called their home.
After their second wedding,they both have laid the foundation of this orphanage together.An endeavour to provide home to children who had noone to call their own.Arnav and her would often come here to spend time with these kids.Alongwith the basic neccessities,these children also needed love and care and they tried to do it the best they can.
She wondered why she hasn't been able to confide in him.He hadn't probed her for any questions,she was well aware how much it would ache him to see her like this but still he hasn't voiced a word.He had just been as her wall being her anchor.
Though having sometime to herself to think,Khushi reached to the conclusion that she herself doesn't know what was exactly troubling her.Yes the events of last evening has triggered that reaction from her and brought back all those horried memories.But right now when she couldn't pinpoint clearly,she felt angrt at herself for feeling this way.
She had accepted the truth long back.It was a reality that she can't alter then why was she being like this.She wasn't a kid anymore,she was a grown up woman and hadn't she been more fortunate than all these kids here.
She has known her parents,felt their love and care and then she did have a family.Yes the differences always remained but she hasn't been living in a fairytale bubble either.Hasn't this been the very reason that she has always accepted every word said to her with a smile,shouldering every responsibility.Then what was it that was gnawing on her senses,she was unable to figure out.
Arnav entered the orphanage,knowing exactly where to find her,he made his way towards the playground.His eyes found her sitting solemnly with a far away look in her eyes.As he stood there staring at her intently,he didn't need to hound his brain further as what may have transpired in his absence became crystal clear to him.
Last night his sole aim had been to comfort her and that is precisely the reason ,this thing didn't crossed his mind.The struggles of his life has mastered him in reading people.He may appear silent on the outside but he observed everything happening around him.Arnav Singh Raizada wasn't oblivious to the step treatment that came her way without her any fault.
He remembered every single instance and the rage that shot through him but he chose to keep quiet for her sake and somewhere down his heart,he was grateful to them because his Khushi was not left homeless after the unfortunate death of her parents.
There were somethings that neither he or Khushi could change.They couldn't bring their parents back and If someone can't see the gem his Khushi was,if someone failed to love her the way she deserved to then it was their loss.It was as simple as that for him.
Khushi had him and he had her and that was the ultimate truth of their life.Hiss family and hers,they both felt dutiful towards them and they would fulfill all that it took but in the end it was only Arnav and Khushi and their small world and he would be damned if he let her drown herself in self inflicting pain.They both have had enough for a lifetime.
He took purposeful strides towards her,sitting on the ground besides her. discarding his coat.But if he expected her to be surprised seeing him there,she was not.
She had known he would come,he was the one person who nomatter what she did would always find his way back to her,Khushi thought as she found the most comfortable place in his arms,resting her head at his heart.
"When we have children,we will tell them about their grandparents.They will know where we come from".
Khushi looked up at him hearing him say the words that has been on her mind as well.His eyes mirrored her pain,there was an hope coupled with an ocean of love synonymous to his name,of the void being fulfilled when they have their own family.
Their trance was broken as they were surrounded by the kids who were gleeing with happiness seeing their two most favourite people day before than their fixated day.The intial excitement was soon followed by the sound of giggles and laughters as Arnav and Khushi let go of themselves completely becoming a child again as they indulged themselves in playing with them.
Instead of driving back home,Arnav took Khushi for a hindi movie.Seeing her so engrossed in the movie as if it was all happening for real and she was a first hand witness to it,Arnav rejoiced in watching the myriad display of emotions on her face.By the time movie ended,Khushi was hungry and well averse with her love for food,Arnav Singh Raizada surprised her for the third time in a day when they dined at Chandni Chowk's Paranthe Waali Galli For Dinner.
And when she questioned that he didn't like to eat at such places,he shut her up with a firm "I don't but you do".Her mouth watered seeing her favourite food as she went on ordering almost bits of everything on the menu.Arnav basked in contentment as Khushi's heartfelt smile lit her face after an entire day.
Sometimes silence is much more comforting than words and that is what surrounded Arnav and Khushi as they drove aimlessly on traffic free roads.Their hands entwined as an innate peace engulfed both them.
By the time they reached home,Khushi was fast asleep in the car.Arnav unfastened her seatbelt and picked her up in his arms as her fingers clutched at his lapels on their own.He tucked her in the bed and sat there caressing her face.Bending down he kissed her forehead and vowed more to himself than her.
"I wish I could feel all the pain instead of you but I promise Khushi,Ill make it go away".
"WHEN IT HURTS TO LOOK BACK AND YOU ARE SCARED TO LOOK AHEAD,YOU CAN LOOK BESIDES YOU AND ILL BE THERE".
PS - If anyone is wondering,Chandni Chowk is actually the heart of Delhi and the food is the major highlight.The Paranthe Waali Galli is pretty famous for its different varieties in Paranthas and they are not to be missed if you are here for a visit.
TO BE CONTINUED.
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