Chapter 3 (Brothers, Banter, and Blunders)
The “Brother” Bond
The narrow lane outside Kaatelal & Sons buzzed with life. Rickshaw bells clanged, vendors shouted, and — like clockwork — the orange Duke roared to a stop.
Garima, already in Gunnu disguise, muttered under her breath, “And here comes trouble on two wheels.”
Vikram strutted in, helmet dangling from one hand, grin firmly in place. “My brother!” he announced loudly, slapping Gunnu on the back so hard the wig nearly slipped.
Garima choked on air. Brother?
“Uh… yes. Brother,” Gunnu said, forcing a grin.
“See?” Vikram said to the nearest customer. “This barber isn’t just my stylist. He’s my brother now. Blood or not, same thing.”
Garima’s smile stiffened. Brother. Out of all things, he had to pick brother.
“Careful, Mehra,” Gunnu said, snipping the customer’s hair with extra flair. “I charge double if you keep hugging me mid-shave.”
“Good,” Vikram smirked, leaning against the counter. “That way, I can pay for my brother’s loyalty.”
Garima clenched her jaw, scissors clicking. If only he knew.
Tea Stall Confessions
Later, Vikram dragged Gunnu to a nearby tea stall.
“Two cutting chai!” he ordered, plopping onto a bench. “Come, brother, sit.”
Garima sat stiffly, tugging at her wig. “You treat all your barbers like siblings?”
“Only the special ones,” Vikram said easily. “You’ve got guts. Honesty. Feels like family.”
Garima’s heart skipped. Family. Dangerous word.
She forced a smirk. “Careful. If you keep adopting strays like me, you’ll run out of helmets.”
Vikram laughed, sipping chai. “Then we’ll share. I’ll drive, you hold on tight. Brothers look out for each other.”
Garima nearly spilled her cup. Hold on tight? This is getting unbearable.
Susheela vs. Chanchal Chachi, Round Two
Back at the Kaatelal house, Susheela — in her Sattu disguise — tiptoed into the kitchen, hoping to steal a late-night paratha.
But fate, in the form of Chanchal Chachi, was already there, kneading dough like she was punishing it.
“Sattu!” Chachi barked, narrowing her eyes. “Why are you sneaking into this house at midnight? This isn’t your baap’s haveli, it’s Kaatelal House!”
Susheela froze, clutching a plate like a shield. “Uh… I was… checking security! Yes. Robbers are everywhere these days.”
Chachi snorted. “Security? With a plate in your hand?”
Susheela quickly hid the paratha behind her back. “Weapon. Very… advanced. Delhi style.”
Chachi stepped closer, squinting. “Advanced weapon? Smells more like ghee than gunpowder.”
Susheela’s nervous laugh echoed through the kitchen. “Exactly! Ghee-power is stronger than gunpowder, Chachi.”
Chachi folded her arms, unimpressed. “Hmph. And why are there two tea cups here when only you came sneaking?”
Susheela stammered, shoving one cup behind a jar. “That? Uh… practice. One for me, one for… my reflection. Builds character.”
“Reflection drinks chai?” Chachi asked flatly.
“Yes! Very modern reflection. Delhi brand.”
Chachi shook her head, muttering, “This Sattu eats more in this house than his own. One day, I’ll check if his real home even exists. Strange boy, with stranger habits.” She stomped off, still glaring over her shoulder.
As soon as she was gone, Susheela sagged against the counter, clutching the paratha like a life raft. “One day, this Chachi will drag me to court herself,” she whispered.
Banter in the Shop
The next day, Vikram appeared yet again, Duke growling like a herald of chaos.
He leaned casually on the barber chair. “So, brother, tell me something. Why don’t you ever talk about your family?”
Garima froze, comb in mid-air. Because you’re staring right at them, fool.
“Private life stays private,” Gunnu said coolly, trimming a customer’s hair.
Vikram smirked. “Ah, mysterious type. Fine. Then at least tell me — why this shop? You could be in Delhi, cutting models’ hair, charging five times the rate.”
Garima tilted her head, lips curving. “Because Delhi doesn’t have customers with your kind of ego. And that’s my specialty — cutting egos down.”
The customer burst out laughing. Vikram clutched his chest dramatically. “Brother, you wound me! First my hair, now my ego.”
“Both needed trimming,” Gunnu shot back.
The shop erupted with laughter, and even Susheela, sweeping nearby, couldn’t hide her smile — though worry flickered in her eyes.
Midnight Ride
That evening, Vikram revved the Duke outside. “Come on, brother, let’s ride. Nothing clears the head like wind in your face.”
Garima hesitated. Riding pillion again meant holding on — dangerous, tempting. But Gunnu couldn’t refuse without suspicion.
So she climbed on, muttering, “If we crash, I’m haunting you.”
“Relax,” Vikram grinned, speeding off into the night. “I take care of my brother.”
Garima’s heart pounded as the wind whipped her wig. She held tighter than she meant to, silently cursing his choice of words. Brother, haan? If only you knew what kind of sister you just adopted.
Closing the Day
Later, back at home, Garima collapsed onto the bed, still flushed from the ride.
Susheela pounced. “He took you out again?! At night?! On that monster bike?!”
Garima smirked, hiding her nerves. “Don’t worry. According to him, I’m just his brother.”
Susheela’s jaw dropped. “BROTHER?!”
“Yes.” Garima grinned wickedly. “So relax. Safe as houses.”
Susheela groaned, burying her face in a pillow. “This is worse. Much worse. Brothers never stay brothers in these stories.”
Outside, the faint growl of the Duke echoed like a promise — playful, dangerous, and impossible to ignore.
The Next Day (Confusion in the Air)
The clang of scissors and the sharp scent of shaving foam filled Kaatelal & Sons that late afternoon. Customers lined the benches, gossip bouncing off the shop’s wooden walls. Gunnu worked briskly, sweeping stray hair while Sattu manned the chair like a general in uniform.
Vikram strolled in casually, helmet tucked under his arm, his confident stride softened with an awkward hesitation.
“Arrey, Bhai! Again?” Sattu teased, raising an eyebrow. “You’re becoming a fixture here more than our customers.”
“Bas… thought I’d check in on my bhai log,” Vikram replied, giving Gunnu a friendly clap on the shoulder. His hand lingered just a second too long. “Besides, Gunnu here gives better company than my useless college friends.”
Garima swallowed hard, masking the jolt that ran through her. She forced a gruff tone. “Bas, bas, don’t butter me up. We charge extra for that.”
The men in the shop laughed, and Vikram smiled wider than necessary.
Later that evening, outside the shop
Vikram leaned against his bike, speaking in low tones to his friend Rohit, who had dropped by. Gunnu, sweeping near the doorway, caught every word.
“Yaar, it’s strange,” Vikram muttered. “I’ve been around plenty of girls—pretty ones too. But this Gunnu… I don’t know, there’s something different. I feel… calmer? Lighter? Even when he irritates me, I just…”
Rohit smirked knowingly. “Bhai, you’re falling for your barber.”
“Shut up!” he hissed, dragging his fingers through his hair when Rohit’s smirk didn’t fade. “It’s not like that. He’s… he’s like a brother. A younger brother. A very… warm, confusing, dangerously magnetic brother.”
Rohit leaned lazily against the bike, eyes gleaming with mischief. “Magnetic, haan? Careful, Bhai, magnets don’t care if it’s north or south—they just attract.”
The words cut deeper than Vikram expected. His jaw tightened, but he said nothing, his silence louder than denial.
Just beyond the threshold, Gunnu’s broom froze mid-air. Garima’s heart hammered in her chest, her breath stuck somewhere between a gasp and a sob. The weight of his confession—twisted by Rohit’s joke, softened by his own hesitation—washed over her in waves of guilt and aching longing.
She pressed herself to the wall, praying they wouldn’t notice her. For the first time, the charade felt less like a disguise and more like a trap she had built with her own hands.
The Salon Chaos
The next day, Vikram decided to “help out.”
“Hand me that razor, Gunnu,” he said confidently, rolling up his sleeves.
Gunnu’s eyes widened. “Arrey, this is not your bike carburetor! One wrong move and you’ll send uncle-ji home with half an eyebrow.”
Sattu snorted. “Go on, try it. Let’s see how much talent you have beyond counting bolts and brake pads.”
But before either of them could stop him, Vikram had already lathered shaving foam on a bewildered customer. He held the razor like a spanner, concentrating so hard his tongue peeked out.
“Steady… steady…” he muttered.
The customer flinched. Foam splattered on Vikram’s shirt. The crowd erupted in laughter.
Sattu smacked his forehead. “Hai Ram! He’ll ruin our reputation before the scissors do!”
Vikram, embarrassed but unwilling to admit defeat, grinned. “Dekha? Free comedy show with every haircut. Best offer in town!”
The shop roared with laughter again. Even Gunnu couldn’t suppress a chuckle, though her chest ached with the memory of his words from the night before.
The more Vikram tried to rationalize his confusion, the deeper he slipped into it. And Gunnu—alongside Sattu, equally invested in the charade—found the comedy of errors tightening like a net neither of them could escape.
The Razor Disaster
The salon was buzzing with chatter when Vikram, with sleeves rolled up, barged confidently behind the barber’s chair.
“Move aside, Gunnu. I’ll show you how it’s done,” he declared.
The poor customer, a pot-bellied uncle-ji with half his face already covered in foam, stiffened in terror.
“Arrey beta, have you… done this before?”
“Of course!” Vikram lied smoothly. “How hard can it be? Just cream and blade. Like adjusting a clutch plate!”
Sattu nearly choked on laughter. “Clutch plate? This is not a Hero Splendor, Bhai. It’s a face!”
Ignoring her, Vikram positioned the razor at a dangerous angle. He pressed too hard, dragging it across the foam with a dramatic flourish. A long white streak appeared, but so did a thin red line.
“AAAAH!” the uncle-ji yelped, clutching his cheek.
“Relax, relax!” Vikram panicked, dabbing at the foam. Instead of wiping, he smeared more cream across the man’s nose. The customer sneezed violently, spraying shaving cream everywhere—on Vikram’s shirt, Gunnu’s face, and even across Sattu’s wig.
The Great Rescue
“Bas! Enough!” Gunnu shoved Vikram aside, her voice gruff but firm. “Go tighten a nut, Romeo, and leave shaving to professionals!”
Sattu swooped in, grabbing a towel and pressing it to the uncle’s face. “You’ll live, uncle-ji. Maybe. Unless you get infection. But don’t worry, Gunnu has special haldi-turmeric treatment.”
“Special?!” Gunnu hissed under her breath, glaring at Susheela’s improvisation.
The entire shop roared with laughter. One of the younger boys shouted, “Oye, Vikram bhaiya! You’re the first mechanic-barber in Rohtak! Maybe open ‘Cuts and Clutches’?”
Even the injured uncle-ji, once pacified, chuckled nervously. “Beta, stick to spark plugs. Your hands are made for spanners, not razors.”
The Aftermath
Red-faced, Vikram slumped in a chair, watching Gunnu clean up the mess with efficient swipes of the razor. His gaze softened despite the humiliation.
There was something about the way Gunnu’s brow furrowed in concentration, the way his (her) laughter burst out unrestrained when Sattu teased him. Vikram found himself smiling without meaning to.
But then the thought crept in again, unsettling and unshakable:
Why does this feel different? Why does being around him… feel good?
“Stop staring and pass me the towel,” Gunnu muttered, snapping him out of his thoughts.
Vikram obeyed instantly, only realizing later how quickly he’d done it.
That night, Gunnu lay awake replaying everything—his words to Rohit, the accidental hand lingering on her shoulder, and the way he had stared while she shaved the uncle clean.
Her heart was split in two: one half soaring at the attention, the other crushed under the weight of the lie.
And across town, Vikram tossed in bed, muttering to himself:
“He’s my brother. Just a brother. A very… dangerously magnetic brother.”
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To be continued.
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