A Strange connection
“Why am I feeling so restless? Why am I thinking about Poornima?” Rajneesh thought. He was unable to understand the new emotions he was feeling. He kept saying in his mind, “I met so many girls in my life, however, I never felt any connection to any of them. On the other hand, Poornima is different. Whenever I meet her and see her, I feel a strange connection. Even the meanings of our names are connected. When Rajneesh means Moon Poornima means the time period of full Moon. Well, it seems I am thinking too much. I need to stop thinking now. So many strange thoughts are occupying my mind. I probably need to talk to someone to understand my thoughts better.”
“Brother! Where are you?” Nirvaan was calling him. Raj came out of his thoughts and responded quickly, “Yes, Nirvaan.” His cousin said, “What were you thinking? You were so immersed in your thoughts. Are you worried about something? Please share with me. I shall try to help you.” Raj told him, “I am very puzzled! Why does someone feel so important only after a few meetings? Why do my thoughts revolve around her so much?” Nirvaan smiled and replied, “Her? Interesting!” Raj said, “Why do you mean, Nirvaan?” He said, “Are you thinking about Poornima?” Raj immediately replied, “How do you know?” Nirvaan replied, “The way you talked about her that day it seemed you started liking her.” Raj told him, “Come on Nirvaan! I barely know her! And you are talking about liking her.” Nirvaan laughed, “Do you know something, brother? When you talk about her your face glows. And you do not realize that.”Raj insisted, “There is nothing like that. I don’t believe you!”
Nirvaan told him, “Brother, I am not a love guru. But I know you. So, I understand you behave differently when you talk about her.” Raj thought deeply, “Is Nirvaan right? Am I behaving differently because of Poornima? Why is this happening?” Nirvaan’s voice helped him come out of his inner monologues. “Brother, you started thinking again!” Raj replied, “Did you come here to say something, Nirvaan? ”He replied promptly, “Oh yes! I completely forgot! Badi Ma is waiting for you. She needs to discuss something important with you.” Raj was slightly surprised, “Ma needs to discuss something important now. It is 10 p.m. right now.”
He went to talk to his mother. Raj’s mother told her, “Beta, this is the right age to get settled. Have you thought about getting married? Do you like someone? If you like someone you can talk about her.” An innocent face came in front of Raj’s eyes when his mother talked about someone special. However, Raj ignored his thought and said, “Ma, please! I do not want to get married now.” His mother insisted, “Beta, you do not understand my concern. It is very important to get married at the right age.” He said immediately, “Can we talk about it later, Ma? I am feeling sleepy right now. Can I go to my room?” His mother said reluctantly, “Okay, go to your room. However, we need to talk about your marriage tomorrow.”
Raj came to his room and started thinking again. Raj preferred to write his thoughts in diaries and had been doing this since his childhood. He started writing, “Feelings or emotions are so complex and life is very unpredictable. It becomes tiresome when we do not understand our own emotions and thoughts. Nirvaan is probably right. I am falling in love with Poornima. There is something different in her and it caught my attention. She’s mentally strong and courageous. However, there is a softness in her eyes. Even though she spoke to me roughly I didn’t mind at all. Why? My heart is getting soft towards her. Yes! I am in love! I tried to ignore my feelings but I couldn’t. These feelings or emotions are so strong that I cannot explain. I never felt such a strong connection with anyone like this. I need to talk to Poornima and understand what she thinks about me. I know she will not care about love. She is struggling with poverty every day. Then why would she think about anything else? She may reject me saying there is a class difference if I convey my feelings to her. No! I shall not say anything to her. I shall try to become her friend at first. She will become my friend and begin to trust me. Friendship is the key to her heart. I shall make her my best friend for sure. When she will become my friend, she will understand I am a good person. She will not be angry with me anymore. I hope I can become a very important person in her life.”
-The end-
liked how you potrayed his inner turmoil of her may not being comfortable due to class issues and how decide to be her friend
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