Chapter 22

Arnav and Khushi heard the door bell ring as they were seated in their room after breakfast. Arnav's eyes immediately fell on Khushi, knowing very well who was on the other side of the door.

Khushi looked at Arnav ji as she was about to get up from the bed.

"Arnav ji...you...you go and see who it is.."Khushi told to Arnav.

"It will be Raphael, Khushi. " Arnav replied.

"Than go and open the door"

Arnav looked at Khushi, confused.

"Why? Don't want to go out with him?" Arnav asked.

"No...we will talk here only, in this room" Khushi replied, crossing her legs on the bed.

Arnav, still his gaze dubious, moved outside the room.

...

"Hello, sweetheart.." the happy voice of Raphael greeted Khushi.

Khushi lifted her gaze to look at him, smiling.

Raphael went and sat beside her.

"So why this change of venue?" Raphael asked.

"Hmm...woh...Arnav ji...what if he again fall sick...we can't go out na..." Khushi replied, smiling.

Raphael smiled back, pinching her cheek.

"Where is Arnav ji?" Khushi asked.

"He got an urgent call, he is attending that" Raphael replied.

"So,...what do we talk today?" Raphael asked playfully.

Khushi looked at him, a mischievous glint shining in her eyes

"Do you have any girlfriend? "

Raphael lifted his eyebrow at her.

"Girlfriend?"

"Yes, girlfriend!" Khushi giggled.

"I have you" Raphael put his hand around her shoulder.

"What?!"

"Yes, you are a girl and also my friend, aren't you?"

"Uffo...I didn't meant like that...I mean do you love anyone?" Khushi asked, wanting to know his secret.

"Oh...the way you love your Arnav ji?" Raphael asked looking in her eyes.

"Yes.." Khushi gave a nod.

"I don't think so...I think love is not my cup of tea. ...I had been in few serious relationship...but it didn't worked for me...so I guess ...no I don't love anyone the way you love your Arnav ji"

"What do you think about love? Do you think fools fall in love? Do you think I am a fool?" Khushi looked at Raphael, expecting him to answer her doubts

"Fool?" Raphael laughed. "I don't know about love but you are definitely not a fool." Raphael tilted his head down to look in her eyes. "Do you know why?" Raphael asked.

Khushi shook her head, staring back at him.

Raphael smiled at her before continuing.

"Because a girl who can make a man like Arnav Singh Raizada go on his knees and beg for forgiveness can be anything but a fool."

Khushi lowered her misted eyes.

"I...I...I am so confused...I mean I want to love him...want to accept him...but...but something is stopping me...I mean...I don't know what is that...you have answer to every question than tell me...what is that?...I...I don't want to hurt him...I love him...I don't want to take any revenge from him...for...for whatever he has done to me...Revenge is not even on my mind, believe me...but when I deny him anything...and...and see the hurt in his eyes... a hurt that he gladly receives because...because he...he thinks I am hurting him because he had done the same...No. I am not doing that...I am not trying to hurt him...it ...it just happens...and that the hurt in his eyes...I can't take that...Tell me one thing, can...can anyone hurt the one whom they love...can you hate or hurt the person you love?" Khushi lifted her face, again the child-like look.

Raphael looked at the lost child in front of him. Her pale face, big doe-like eyes deprived of any peace clearly shown by her dark circles under her eyes. He looked at her petite form and even felt the fragile state of her heart. His heart surged with protectiveness, to protect the child in front of him.

Resting his palm against her cheek, he began.

"Can you define love, Khushi?" Raphael asked, his eyes shining with affection.

Khushi's unsure eyes just stared at him.

Raphael waited for the response, but none came. So resting her head on his shoulder he began.

"No one can define love, Khushi. No one. A love can be as pure as mother s love for her baby, she can do anything for her child, her love is so pure that even if she is in pain, she cuddles her child close to her chest. Just like yours, you love your Arnav ji. Your love wants to give him, love him, a selfless love. And on the other side, Arnav too loves you. But he is a selfish lover. A lover who wants his love to be with him, love him as he does. Your love for him wants to give him everything, and his love wants to take everything you have. Because he thinks loving you means he owns you, that he had conquered you. And your love? Your love wants to give him everything he wants, love him selflessly. And his love is selfish. And there is nothing wrong in that. Absolutely nothing. He is a possessive lover, who just wants his love to be with him, not caring about anything and anyone. And may be this is the reason behind what he did after the misunderstanding. He abused you, tried to make you suffer, tried to destroy you, tried to hate you just like he thought you are doing. He wanted to abuse you because he thought you had abused his love by having an affair with his B-I-L. He wanted to make you suffer just like he was suffering. He wanted to hate you just like he thought you hated him. And today also, the unconditional love is showing you, leaving his Di for you. By doing all this he is doing nothing for you, he is just making sure his love stays with him. He selfishly wants to keep you with him. Tell me Khushi, why he refused to leave you after you said you don't need him anymore? You know why? Because he is selfish. He can do anything. He can do anything to keep you with him, even if that means hurting himself. Just like he is doing now. I know he is not happy to be separated by his family, I know he don't like me coming so close to you. But still. Still he is tolerating all this. Why? Because he knows that by doing all this he can keep you with him. If we see, than we will not find any difference in your love and Arnav's love. We will not be able to find any difference in selfish love and selfless love. The only difference lay in separation. The day he said that he married you because you had an affair, he told that he hates you and that he will leave you. That day you were shattered, desperate to mend the broken pieces, you wanted him to love you just like you do, you wanted him to see your love, you wanted him to never leave you, you wanted him to accept you. But he left you. And you, instead of going after him, you allowed him to leave you. Because your selfless love didn't allowed you to go after him, to beg him, and tie him in a relation he don't want to be and instead you succumbed yourself in your imaginary world, a unreal world were your Arnav ji loves you, you can see the love in his eyes which you wanted to see, and you accepted it. You thought that this world is better were your Arnav ji loves you, cares for you, doesn't abuse you and you accepted it with whole heart and cut all ties with the real world. That's your selfless love for him. And Arnav? A selfish lover like Arnav, once he knew your innocence and love for him and that he loves you, he ran for you, pleaded you, begged you but you refused. But still he tried, tried till you gave up and agreed to live with him. A man like Arnav can never accept any unreal world, he is a strong man, who has his heart and mind in control. Only your love has the power to overpower his all senses. And if you would have refused to come with you, than instead of dawning himself in any unreal world like you, he would have killed himself."

Raphael was forced to stop as Khushi threw her in his arms.

"No...Don't say that...please...he can't leave me..." Khushi sobbed frantically clinging to him.

"Shhh.." Raphael ran his hand on her back. " It's an illusion that strong man can take anything, can make a way for him no matter were he is stuck. No one is strong, Khushi. Everyone has his or her weakness. Have you heard about Adolf Hitler, Khushi? He too was a strong man, a manipulator, a man with immense power, who was on a mission to conquer the world. But he too had a weakness, you know were his weakness lay? Defeat. Success was like a drug for him, he needed it, at any cost. And you know what he did after he was forced to face his first defeat? He killed himself. Suicide. At that time nobody believed that. Even today when we talk about his suicide, a tiny part of our brain isn't ready to accept that a man like Hitler can kill himself. But I believe. I believe that when a person is made to face his fear than he can do anything. I am not comparing Arnav with any Hitler. All I am saying is just like defeat was Hitler's biggest fear, his biggest weakness, the same way Arnav s biggest weakness is you, he fears losing you." Raphael pulled away from the hug and made her look at him.

"So don't you ever think that, his selfish love holds any control over your selfless love. Don't you ever think that he will leave you because he can NEVER. He needs you like a drug. He needs you for his survival. You are his sustenance. You have proved him that you can live without him. Even if it is an unreal world. But still you can.But he? He had proved you that he can't live without you. So if you fear losing him than you can put that demon to rest because what you fear is his BIGGEST fear, a nightmare, which if turned into reality than he can do anything. He can even burn the whole world down or can even kill himself."

Raphael looked in her eyes, the dubious clouds that had overshadowed her, now clearing.

"He will never leave me? " Khushi asked with so innocence and hope shining in her doe-like eyes that Raphael felt a sudden lump rouse in his throat.

Swallowing the lump, he shook his head.

"Never. If he loves his life, that is..." Raphael laughed.

Khushi smiled, her fears finding it's abyss.

Khuhi stared at Raphael, his arms still around her.

"You know..." Khushi started.

"I know what?" Raphael lifted his eyebrow.

"You are..."

"I am?"

"You are my Angel." Khushi said with all seriousness.

Raphael looked at Khushi for few seconds before bursting into laughter.

Khushi looked at him confused and pulled back from him, siting cross legged in front of him.

"What? Why are you laughing?" Khushi demanded.

"Angel?" Raphael again laughed. "This is my first. I had been called crazy, insane, weird and even psycho but Angel?" he was again found laughing.

Khushi looked at him, not an ounce of playfulness on her face, she was all serious.

"Hum saach bol rahe hain, aapko mazaak lag raha hai? You are really my Angel" Khushi said again with all earnestness.

Raphael laughter convinced to a smile.

"Your Angel?" Raphael asked, caressing her cheek with his thumb.

Khushi nodded her head innocently. Leaning closer, she kissed his cheek.

"My Angel with beards.." Khushi laughed, throwing her head back.

Raphael joined her, mesmerized by her laughing face. He looked at her happy face with a pride surging inside him, a pride a father feels after helping his child take his first step on his two wobbly feet.