Part 10 (Day 4[Part 1])

Khushi stirred in her sleep as the morning sunrays woke her up. She tried to lift her left hand to cover her eyes from the disturbing sunrays but she was unable to move it. Khushi tried to open her eyes, blinking rapidly to focus her sight. With her sight still blurry she noticed her hand being held in a tight grip by a bigger hand. She moved her gaze up and saw the owner of the hand. With her gaze fixed on his face, she inched closer to him and instantly was aware of the weight on her waist. Lifting her empty hand she graced his face. Her soft hand tracing his face, his forehead, his closed eyes, his cheeks, his sharp cheekbones, and finally resting on his lips. Khushi stared at his lips and then lifted her eyes to look at his face. Slowly slowly leaning close to him, she softly pecked his lips and saw him stir in his sleep. She immediately moved away from him, afraid, but the hand on her waist didn't allowed her to move away. Her gaze immediately went towards his face, frightened that he is awake, but he wasn't.

He again stirred in his sleep, the sunrays disturbing him. Khushi lifted her hand to block the sunrays from falling on his face but it was a futile attempt. Catching hold of the hem of her duaptta, she spread her see through dupatta in front on his face and saw his features relax. With a small smile playing on her lips, she covered his face with her dupatta and tried to dislodge her waist from his hold. But as she was about to get up, her mouth let out a soft gasp as the hold on her waist tightened and she landed straight on his chest.

Arnav slowly opened his eyes to see through the transparent dupatta. He saw her frightened face and desperate to vanish that fright from her face, he pushed her more into him. With his both hands securing her into his arms, he began.

"What were you doing?" Arnav asked her in a morning hoarse voice.

"Hum...Hum...kuch nahi.." Khushi stammered, wrinkling in his hold.

"Kuch nahi? But that's not what I saw you doing" Arnav breathed on her face.

Khushi's breath hitched. Her hands slowly moving towards his shoulder.

"Hum...hum...kuch nahi...saachi" Khushi rasped, her body trembling due to the close proximity.

"Accha? Then let me do something then.." Arnav lifted his head little from the pillow and touched her lips with his, the transparent dupatta being a nonexistent barrier.

"Hmmm" Khushi protested and lifted her face.

"Chubh raha hai..." She rubbed her lips with her fingers.

Arnav let out a soft chuckle and removed the dupatta from between them. Pulling her again to him, he softly kissed her cheek.

"Ab nahi chubhegi" Arnav gave a heart melting smile.

Khushi just stared at him, her beautiful orbs fixed with his caramel one.

"Khushi, what should I do for your forgiveness?" Arnav broke the silence. His voice reaching the deepest and the darkest recesses of her heart.

Khushi still stared at him, a very simple question and she even knows the answer to, but what after that? What after this one week? What after this week he has asked for? Will they again go back to the same world and this fairy world will come to an end? What will she do then? She will die this time, this time she will not survive.

"And what if you left be after I forgive you?" Khushi slummed against his chest, too tiered of fighting against literally everything. "Nobody comes back once they leave me." Khushi continued in her pained voice. " Amma Babuji left me and never came back." Khushi closed her eyes as her heart cried for her loss. "You also told, you will leave me. What if you left me? You married me for six months and after that you will leave me. You told that day. You married me for your Di and now you will leave me. You told me...you told me..How can you say that?!" Kushi pulled away from his chest. "How can you, Arnav ji?!! How can you say that?!" She started smacking his chest with her small fist but with all the strength she can gather. "Tell me...Tell me...You answer me...answer me!!" Khushi shouted, the hot stream flowing down her cheek. "Answer me!! You want forgiveness? You want my forgiveness?!! Then first wipe away that day from by mind, heart and soul. Please earse it...then...then I will forgive you...You had told that you can do anything, right?! Then do this small thing for me!! Do it for me...you told you love me , right?! Then do it. Do na Arnav ji!! Do! You can do anything, na? Then do it!! Please do it...I don't want to remember that day...whenever you ask for forgiveness that day starts playing like a reel in front of my eyes...do something to vanish it...do it, Arnav ji!! Please...please" Khushi again crashed against his chest as all the strength left her body.

Arnav embarced her tiny figure in his large one, his eyes all red due to the unshed tears. His one hand went to her cheek as he lifted her face. He dropped desperate kisses all over her face, breathing a sorry after every kiss. "Sorry...Sorry for everything Khushi...You know I am a Rakshash...A true Rakshash...A Laad Governor...A useless man who can't do anything without your help...help me...help me Khushi...Tell me what should I do to vanish every harsh memories...Tell me Khushi...I will do anything...just tell me...tell me Khushi, please..." Arnav pleaded desperate for some help. Any help where he can vanish all the memories of past three months for her as well as from his mind.

"Don't ask..."

"Khushi?"

"Don't ask for forgiveness,,,,,,I don't want to revist the memories for which you are asking for forgiveness...I don't want...don't want" Khushi whispered against his neck.

"I will not...I will not, Khushi.." Arnav promised. He will not ask for forgiveness. He will give her moments that will over shadow all other memories. He will give her beautiful moments, beauty of which will vanish all other memories from her heart.

...

Arnav laid the ordered dishes on the dining table and looked at khushi, who was siting silently on her chair. After her morning breakdown and his promise, she haven't uttered a word. After her breakdown he had picked her up, took her inside the room, wipped her drenched cheeks, whispering his love and promise again and again, wanting to gain some reaction, anything, even the smacking on his chest would have done. But she remained silent, not even lifting her eyes to look at him. Was the Khushi yesterday night an illusion, a beautiful dream?

"Khushi breakfast..." Arnav pushed the filled plate in front of her. And soon saw her mechanically pushing the morsel down her throat.

Arnav closed his eyes and clenched his jaws. What more she wants him to do? What more he can do? He is showing her how much he loves her. He is ready to do anything for her. Then what else she wants him to do? He will do anything, all she needs to do is ask for it and he will do it! Then why she is all quite, why can't she tell him. Like she use to do. She use to fight with him, quarrel with him, call him names, nag him till she gets what she wants. Then why can't she demand it now? Why?!

Arnav's thoughts were short lived as he heard the doorbell ring. He got up from his chair but like yesterday, Khushi stood immediately and ran off towards the door.

Raphael stood in front of the door, whistling. His both hands in his trouser pockets. He heard the door being unlatched but what hit him after that, he had no clue.

"Khushi?" his hands went on Khushi's shoulder to hold her to him.

"You are late today. I want to talk to you." Khushi breathed as she tightened her hold on him.

"Sorry for being late and yes. We can talk as much you want" Raphael said, smiling, as he pulled away from the hug.

Khushi smiled at him and turned around.

"Arnav ji, you have your breakfast and take your medicines" Khushi told without lifting her eyes to look at him and again turned.

"Chale?" Khushi caught Raphael's hand in her.

Raphael nodded and they both walked out of the cottage.

Arnav just stared at the closed door, not knowing what to feel. So it's just him she is being all immune. She can hug that man, complaint for being late, talk but not with him.

He is not the one who had hurt her, it's you!

A voice that had permanent taken a place within him, retorted back.

His lips strectched into a smile and he soon found himself splintered into a wild mirth. Yes! He had hurt her and now it's her turn. And she is bloody awesome at that! Yes! she was hurt. He had hurt her BUT wasn't he hurt when he saw the only woman his heart has allowed to love, other than his Di, in the arm of other man? Wasn't he hurt when he dragged her to the temple? Wasn't he hurt when he forcefully married her, bearing her accusing eyes? Wasn't he the one who was hurt when he saw her receving the slap from her Amma? Wasn't he hurt when he threw her out of his room? Wasn't he hurt when he saw her shivering in the cold night? Wasn't he hurt whenever her accusing and pained eyes looked at him? Wasn't he hurt when he heard his Mami taunting her? Wasn't he hurt when he saw that burn on her hand?

Bloody wasn't he hurt too in this past three months?!!!

The glass held in his hand broke, unable to bear the pressure and soon his bloods pooled at the floor.

*drip*

*drip*

*drip*

He saw the blood exude out from his hand. But why wasn't it hurting? Why wasn't the wound in his hand lessening the pain in his heart?

Why?!

He crumbled in the corner, all the energy leaving him in a hush.

...

Raphael looked at Khushi as she walked with him. What is bothering her?

"Khushi?"

"Huh?"

"You wanted to talk about something, right?" Raphael asked as he stood in front of her.

Khushi looked at him for a moment before nodding her head affirmatively.

"Then tell me.." Raphael encouraged.

"Why am I so confused?" Khushi asked, her expression nothing less then a child who thinks their parents have an answer to every question.

Raphael smiled at her and took her to the same stone bench they had sat yesterday.

"About what, Khushi?" Raphael began.

"About everything...about me...about him...everything..."

"Lets began from one and then proceed further, is that ok with you?" Raphael asked her.

Khushi nodded her head.

"I don't want his sorry..." Khushi said after few moments of silence.

Raphael stared at her, without saying anything, wanting her to proceed.

"Today he asked for forgiveness...but...but it's not about forgiving him...whenever he asks for forgiveness...his words...his words reverberate in my ears...it's not him I can't forgive...it's his words I am unable to forget...I...I...I don't want to shout at him...I don't want to deny him anything...but...but whenever he asks for forgiveness or looks at me with that guilt ridden eyes, all I can remember is his words. I don't want to remember that...I...I just want to forget it...just erase in from my mind ...but it never goes away...You had told you will help me...So tell me ...tell me what should I do?" Khushi asked, softly, looking at him.

Raphael smiled at her and took her one hand in his.

"Close your eyes, Khushi."

"What?" Khushi looked confused.

"Just do it."

Khushi obliged to him and closed her eyes.

Raphael unfisted her palm and kept on her closed eyes.

"What do you see, Khushi?" Raphael asked in a low voice.

"Dark...everywhere I see is dark...I am afraid of dark" Khushi tried to push his hand that was holding her hand to her eyes, but Raphael stopped her.

"There's no need to be afraid, Khushi. Just concentrate on my words, will you?"

Khushi nodded her head.

"Just rememeber the day he accused you of having an affair." Raphael said in a low voice and felt Khushi's hand clutch his hand in a tight grip as she shook her head.

"Trust me, Khushi. Just do what I am saying."

Khushi tried to regulate her breathing. All she was able to see was darkness. As Raphael's words fell on her ear, she tried to do as he asked her to. And then everything started--- his pulling her, shouting on her, her asking him the reason behind their marriage, his shouting the reason, accusing her and then...then the heartbreak.

Raphael felt Khushi trying to sway her hands away from her eyes, violently, using her all strength. But he held on her tight, not allowing her to open her eyes.

"Leave me...pull your hands away...pull it...please...I will die...please ...please...his eyes...his eyes are so accusing...I will die...please...please..."

Raphael pulled her in his arms, still not allowing her to open her eyes.

"Shhh...Shhh... Don't panic, Khushi. Just listen to me...shhh. Now think about all the good memories you have spend with him...when his eyes weren't accusing but held only love...love for you... " Raphael whispered in her ears, as he held her close to his chest, his hands still on her eyes. And as soon as he finished, he felt Khushi relax in his arms.

Khushi felt her beat coming back to its uniformity as she heard Raphael's words. Love? Yes! She had seen love in his eyes, floating like a soft feather in his brown caramel eyes. She has seen love when he had shook her asking her what if he had lost her? She had seen love when he helped her during her Jiji's wedding. She had seen love when he handed her the hanky to wip her tears, she had seen love when he had bought her bangles, she had seen love when he told her he wanted to say something. He loved her then. She had seen it.

"He loved me then...I had seen it...he loved me...he loves me" Khushi splintered her words.

Raphael smiled at her face, which was gaining back it's glow.

"Yes, he did and he still does. Now tell me Khushi, which Arnav ji you want? The Arnav ji who loves you or the Arnav ji who you don't like to remember?" Raphael asked, choosing his words carefully, not wanting to ruin the progress he had made.

"I..I...Who...who loves me...I want the Arnav ji who loves me...I want him..." Khushi whispered, exhausted by all the mental work.

"Then just remember that moments and push the harsh memories to the darkest pit of your mind, where you can never reach. Push it, Khushi. Push it so far away, that it never returns again...not even when someone tries to remind you...just push it...and just remember the moments you have lived with Arnav ji, who loves you...and throw the other away...lock it in a empty room and throw the key in the deepest sea. Try it, Khushi. Do as I say! Do it." Raphael's tone turned from soft to authoritative.

Khushi fought, she fought to push those memories in the darkness, where she can't see it, can't feel it. She allowed her mind to swallow the good memories and diffuse the bad one from her mind. And soon her feature relaxed, she had done as he said and now she felt the good memories overshadow the bad one.

Raphael felt Khushi relax against him and he knew he was yet again suceesful. But today this success brought something else with it. Today it wasn't to boost his career, today it didn't felt like he had achieved yet another stone in the race. Today a contentment spread on his heart, a unknown happiness. He kissed her forehead, as he pulled his hand away from her eyes.

"Open your eyes, Khushi.." Raphael said softly.

And saw her orbs flutter against the closed eyelids and then slowly slowly she opened her eyes.

"Are you still confused, Khushi?" Raphael asked, a smile playing on his lips.

Khushi lifted her head to look in his smiling eyes. She slowly shook her head and hugged him tight.

"Thank you...Thank you so much...Be always there for me...I need you...Don't go away...I need you.." Khushi expressed her gratitude, too happy to find someone who can help her.

Raphael hugged her back, praying to God that she never ever again need someone like him. He wants to treat her as soon as possible and make her all well. But he liked the feeling of being needed, to be wanted.

Precap---

Raphael pulled Khushi away, forcefully.

"Khushi, let him treat Arnav. You are not helping him. Listen to me" he hugged her, not allowing her to move.

"No! Leave me...I want to be near him. He will leave me...he will leave me. Why isn't he opening his eyes?! Why?! Don't he know that I can't live without him, don't he?! Leave me! Leave me...otherwise he will leave me...please leave me...leave me...I beg you" but Raphael held her tight as she violently sobbed and fought him in his arms.

"Shh...shh, Khushi...he will open his eyes, dear...he will be all fine..trust me...you trust me, don't you? "

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shona_arhilover2014-03-20 05:51:43